Parents of the HS Class of 2017 (Part 1)

I thought I’d share the text of an email that all the seniors (and their parents) got at my son’s school today. I thought it was potentially really helpful for the kids to hear this before ED decisions start rolling in (and I also just found out that he’ll hear on his ED application on Friday evening!).

Dear Seniors and Parents:

Below is an excerpt of a chapel talk made by a student at Groton a few years ago. We urge you to read it and reflect on his comments as he describes a way to approach the next few days, whether you receive a rejection, a deferral, or an acceptance.

Sincerely,

The College Office

…Up until this point, my life has played itself out in a predictable fashion. […] I have never had to leap any hurdles or break down any walls standing in my way. While I’m thankful for this, I am also a little wary of what this lack of adversity may cause in my future experiences.

But please don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade my childhood for anything. […] My predictable life has lead me here, and I’m extremely grateful for that. I have enjoyed my long walk on this straight road I’m on, but I feel as though I may be approaching a turn.

This past Saturday, I got rejected from the college that I had always dreamed of attending. I logged on to the admission office’s website, clicked on the link to show me their decision, and saw “we regret to inform you…” glaring at me from the top of the page. When I was little I used to go up to this college’s campus and visit my cousin. I saw how incredibly happy he was there, and I immediately decided that I needed to be a part of that school’s community. I looked at a place from the outside in and made my decision to apply based solely on my own small glimpses into life on that college’s campus. At the beginning of this past term I applied early decision, without ever really taking other possible choices into account. And in the end, things didn’t go the way I originally planned.

That admission office’s decision has created a fork in my road. I stand here giving this talk without knowing where I will turn next, and that feeling excites me. Never before have I stood before a slate this blank. Last Friday, I thought that I would awake the next morning and have my next move spelled out for me. But here I am, 48 hours later, telling you about my failure to achieve that next move. However, I don’t view this as a failure. And I want to stress that point. I don’t think of that rejection as a failure. While I am disappointed, I know I have many other options that will make me very happy.

In the coming weeks my fellow form mates will start to hear from their respective colleges, and I would like to take this chance to say to all of them to not let one rejection put you down. You are all talented and kind people that I feel blessed to go to school with. You have made these last five years the best years of my life and I’d like to thank you all for the memories you have given me. They are more valuable than any acceptance letter to a college. Please don’t forget that. I also want to remind you that while one outright rejection may feel like the failure of all your hard work at Groton, I urge you to look upon it as an exciting new beginning. This is your life we’re talking about. Take it into your control and see what happens. It’s exciting to stand here about to enter my next phase of life without really knowing what my move is going to be.