@lollylolly I think that you will find that your daughter has Aspergers, I think you might find William & Mary to a better fit than most colleges. I think many students at William & Mary fully embrace their nerdy or quirky sides (one of the places it is seen as “cool”) and the college in general makes a big deal of its community and being a very welcoming environment. There are quite a few students that I know that are high functioning, but also somewhere on the spectrum, a couple of my friends identify this way, and there is even an active neurodiversity student organization.
When I was at William & Mary, I used to participate in their program where they could host prospective students overnight, and one student I hosted overnight had certain characteristics that I suspected strongly aligned with Aspergers. After giving him a tour and introducing him around, he eventually decided to attend William & Mary. Every time I walked across campus, I would find that he would be welcomed or embraced by different friends, he led certain clubs on campus, and overall seemed to be very well adjusted on campus.
William & Mary can still be a challenging academic school, but not for the reasons that you mentioned. I think students overall are incredibly collaborative, supportive of one another, and not really competitive in comparison to some other schools. I completely agree with the characterizations given by @collegemom3717 and @3SailAway as a very accurate way to describe the college experience there.
I think your student can certainly thrive there, as I know many students that have gone through there and have as well. One thing that might be helpful as well as you go throughout your search, is contacting and seeing what resources are available to students via the college accessibility office. William & Mary does a decent job at providing accommodations to students I believe, and there might be certain resources that different colleges might provide that could be beneficial to them.
Cheers your college search! Like I mentioned in my earlier thread, I answer some questions about W&M here so feel free to take a peek as well http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/t/ask-questions-about-william-and-mary-here/.