<p>Especially if you live in the northern states, look at some colleges in Canada. They can be a great value. </p>
<p>Read “The Price of Admission” by Daniel Golden for a peek into the college admission process. It may be disheartening but it is better to know how the game works before getting the thin envelopes in the mail and wondering where things went wrong. </p>
<p>Do not live in a community where you are surrounded by legacy or “development cases” unless you are one yourself. Your child will have to rub shoulders every day at school with inferior students who were admitted over them because of their parents’ alma maters or bank balances. This can make an already stressful time that much more painful. </p>
<p>More than anything, remember the admissions process is imperfect at best, and the decisions do not prove, disprove, validate or invalidate anything, especially who your children truly are, at heart. If they don’t get into their dream school, reassure them, “They let a good one get away.”</p>
<p>re post 180: another way to combat this is to encourage your child to not fall head over heels over a single number 1 choice. During the search process talk up and encourage her/him to focus on the benefits of all the schools on her/his list. We have found that there isn’t a perfect #1. Instead there are multiple great places. The more research you can do the clearer this becomes.</p>
<p>Unless you (parent) are completely clueless, avoid spending the money to hire a private college counselor. All you need is a good organization system and a sympathetic and patient English teacher to help with the essays. Trust me on this - we wasted thousands of dollars and got absolutely nothing of substance from our counselor.</p>
<p>Unless you REALLY don’t have any time or inclination, taking this on as a family activity is just plain fun and interesting–most of it anyway.</p>
<p>This will sound immodest, but I’ve been wracking my brain to think of any mistake we made in this process and “senseless worrying” is the only thing that comes to mind. I read so many books and talked to so many people and spent SOOOO much time on CC, I don’t think my son missed a trick.</p>
<p>I do think historymom’s point is a great one. The first book I read on admissions hammered away at having several first choices. My son stuck with this approach so completely that he had a lot of deciding to do in the month of April. I must say, just about everyone who talked with him about college tried to get him to rank his choices. Well intentioned, I guess, but it drove me crazy.</p>
<p>elizabethh - not all English teachers are created equal. Having put two through the application process now I would not recommend relying on the English teacher for college essays unless you know the English teacher has sat in the admissions information sessions recently and really gets how competitive admissions is and how admissions uses essays. Even our GCs have not updated themselves in many years. I would recommend that parents NOT count on their school personnel to be current re: admissions unless they are paying for private schools that are heavily involved in admissions. I am not sure you should pay for a college counselor but I do recommend students check out some of the books about essays for college. I do think very busy families will find it hard to multi-task life, work, school and the 10 application college process. Some people may be willing to pay for the extra set of hands or eyes.</p>
<p>bethievt,
Absolutely agree on not having one be-all, end-all favorite. DS took this one to heart and plans to implement the results late this month. Each school has some obvious merits that make it attractive enough to DS to choose it over all others. After living with his list, visits, chats with friends and profs, essays and lots of thinking over the past year, he has it somewhat narrowed, but I expect there will be lots of pros/cons discussions over the next six weeks. </p>
<p>There is no one perfect match for him – but there are several wonderful choices where he can grab all the opportunties he wants and make the experience what <em>he</em> wants it to be.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Underestimated the time and pain of essays and the associated burn out as the process goes on (common app is better than none, but the sups drive you nuts.</p></li>
<li><p>How important it is for the applicant to be really liked by the HS personnel. Helps get the best recommenders and support (we were lucky, but I never thought about it ahead of time).</p></li>
<li><p>Total cost of the process (application fees, test fees, visits to colleges, etc.) I knew all of these things but somehow never aggregated them. The number is big, particularly if you are in a sport that requires significan travel also (i.e., $1000/event).</p></li>
<li><p>Exact nature of the athletic quality academic quality tradeoff. This seems important has the acceptances come in and we see people who have made the wrong decision by pushing the athlete side at the expense of the academic side.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>There’s a term from some novel about being “heart-whole” going into a relationship–ooh–it was Louisa May Alcott in one of her earlier writings, I think. That’s what I wanted for my son–that he would be able to pick his absolute favorite knowing he’d be loved back. But it might be safe to call me “over-protective”. Haha.</p>
<p>I agree with hudsonvalley. My guidance counselor told me not to apply to BU because I live in New England and probably wouldn’t get it. She did instruct me to apply to Harvard and Yale. Cool, except I have a 1980 SAT and an A- average at a public school. That literally would have been asking for two rejection letters. </p>
<p>I don’t know if someone already posted this, but ask as many teachers as you can find that like you to write recommendations for you, even if you think they can’t write a good letter. I asked eleven teachers and the ones that I expected to be awful turned out to be my best ones; the ones that I expected to be punctual were the ones I received four months after my request.</p>
<p>This has probably been said, but cram for your SATs in ninth and tenth grade, so you can get your 2300 without cramming in 11th grade, a year when you will be taking much harder classes, and stressing about 100 other things, like ECs and APs. In ninth and tenth grade, you have to work just as hard as in your eleventh grade year if you want the combination of high stats and amazing ECs. Getting the SATs/IIs/ACTs out of the way can allow you to do really cool stuff during your 11/12 years, which is what makes you stand out. You can’t do everything in your eleventh grade year, trust me. Also, use summers to do great things, summer is a tool to be used to get you into college. Start building your app yesterday.</p>
<p>I went through most of the posts and for sure, I wish I had known some of these before applying to college. These might be on the list already, but here’s what I have to add, based on my legion of mistakes:</p>
<ul>
<li>Consider the environments of your prospective schools (e. g. small liberal arts college, huge research university, etc.) and whether you will be comfortable learning and living in them.</li>
<li>If you think you might want to double-major, look into it early (sometime during freshman year).</li>
<li>If you don’t know what you want to do, or if what you really want to do isn’t offered as a major at your prospective schools, consider applying undeclared. I’m not sure how it is at other universities, but at mine, it is troublesome to switch majors.</li>
<li>I feel dumb saying this, but…do NOT attend/apply to a school simply because your friends/relatives/significant other/object of affection goes there. The norm is not right for everyone. I firmly believe that some people do not thrive in college and would be better off going straight to work or to a trade school.</li>
</ul>
<p>I have no idea if this one is in here already, but if you plan on sending a CD supplement for music to a BA school (note that I am not talking about BMus schools, where you have to audition to get in), consider contact the appropriate faculty member to ask if you can sing/play for him/her early in the process–Jan/Feb would be good (do NOT call right now to ask, seniors! It’s really too late).</p>
<p>I’ve heard of two guys who sang for Princeton in person (the tenor got in!), and my son has traveled to one of his BA colleges to sing for the choral director and rehearse with the choir and the director said he’d twist arms to get him in (I realize this is a pep talk; this college is a super reach for my son). I would only suggest this for people who intend to pursue their instrument (which could include voice) in that college, and only if you are pretty darn good. Send in your CD, too.</p>
<p>I have a number of friends right now whose kids either tried college and didn’t like it or have always wanted to take another path and are delaying college or may never want to go. There is nothing wrong with this and for some people it’s absolutely the best path. Plus, if they change their minds, the option is always there. One of the smartest, most successful people I know didn’t finish college and our beloved latetoschool has been fabulously successful without it also–I think I’m right that her screen name refers to a “lack” of a college diploma–if so, it’s the only thing she lacks–what a force of nature! College is great, but it’s not the only way to do well.</p>
<p>Spend more time on the front end, researching which few colleges are the very best fit, and this will translate to less time during the application process.</p>
<p>Fewer applications means better applications! and more genuine essays about your sincerely wanting to be part of that college community.</p>
<p>ONLY apply to colleges that you sincerely wish to attend.</p>
<p>I would add to that^^^ and say that creating a preliminary list of 10+ well researched schools Jr year makes it easier to trim down to the 4-6 you sincerely wish to apply to/attend.</p>
<p>einahpets don’t feel dumb for saying that people should never choose a school just because of someone else. It happens a lot here and usually with disastrous results. That is excellent advice!</p>
<p>I wish I had known about schools who were generous with money.
I wish I had a list of schools that would give me money for things I was doing so I would go all out.
I wish I had known that little little things can make you really love a place.</p>
<h1>??? Make sure you’ve learned how to converse with elders and strangers and make sure you’ve got some basic social skills. You’re going to meet many tour guides and admissions folks and future employers. Social skills are the most important skills you’ll ever learn.</h1>
<p>Make sure your school sends transcripts to the right campus you are applying to if the college has more than one branch. Right out the address on the envelope if you have to.</p>
<p>Since it went up, I’ve been looking at this thread trying to figure out how to respond.</p>
<p>Hmmm. After reading CC since virtually the time it started, long before my kids were headed to college; after making some mistakes with older S, when it comes to younger S’s college experience, I can honestly say that there was absolutely nothing that I wish I had known before his college search.</p>
<p>No joke! Thanks, CC! And thanks to the hard knocks school of parent education via older S!</p>