Missypie, the other advantage to quiche is that it can be made in advance!
My daughter ended up with seven bridesmaids (a lot, I know), but she has a sister (maid of honor) and she moved to seven different locations while growing up due to my husband’s job. She is extremely outgoing and made so many life-long friends during our many moves - she really struggled to hold it to just seven! Besides her sister, her bridesmaids include her two best friends from elementary school, her two best friends from high school, and her two best friends from college. She is so tight with all of them. She doesn’t have any bridesmaids from grad school, but many of them will be invited to her wedding. It can be so different within a family - my middle daughter says she wants a small wedding (when she gets married WAY down the road) with only a couple of bridesmaids. Both scenarios will be fun!
missypie, big box of fried chicken
My daughter has a friend whose cousin is a gourmet cake artist (art is the only way to describe the gorgeous and lifelike cake sculptures she makes) who made for my daughter packages of 5 little cake balls iced so to read “Will You Be My BridesMaid”. Each bridesmaid was sent a box. As to the Maid of Honor, my daughter and she are so incredibly close and attuned to each other that it’s like 2 bodies with one brain. There was never any question about who would be the MoH. It was like they just knew organically, like it was programmed in their DNA. The MoH is best friends with my daughter’s fiancé and was in on things even before my daughter, helping the fiance to stage a candle lit proposal in a park in the city where they all live.
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I think my D just called and asked MofH and bridesmaids.
I’ve always liked you, youdon’tsay! Most people won’t admit to liking fried chicken anymore.
@missypie You’re hanging around with the wrong folks, or maybe just the skinny ones. 
“Day-of” coordinators – I didn’t know that such a thing existed, but sounds like a good idea to me.
Anyone have any experience / recommendations / things to look for or watch out for? From DD’s wedding-planning spreadsheet, it looks like they are being quoted prices at least ranging from $750-$2250.
We just chose a reliable relative, who was one of my 1st cousins. She didn’t have an fires to put out but was standing by, just in case. For my niece’s wedding, I was the official coordinator and did put out a few brush fires, but it went very nicely. I think it’s not all that tough to find a friend or relative who would be happy to serve. My neighbor served for one of her friend’s D’s weddings and she had a family friend serve for her D’s wedding.
I’d add that it’s a “destination” wedding and bride & groom live far from parents & home. I put “destination” in quotes because it’s nobody’s idea of a dream vacation in August. They are getting married in central NJ… which does have advantages over their home city of Brooklyn. But I have the sense that anyone close enough to them to be willing and able to take on that responsibility might be someone who really ought to be an invited guest.
Yeah calmom, that’s often the dilemma. My daughter has worked as a day of coordinator for a wedding planner and it really can take so much stress off a bride and her immediate family. Everything from assisting the bride in getting ready for the ceremony and keeping scheduling of pre-ceremony prep and formals coordinated and on track, to making sure all the vendors interface and coordinate well at the beginning of the reception when all the entrances and first dances get cued up. My daughter is using a coordinator at her wedding in October. When interviewing them, really talk to them about what they see their role as being and how they would recommend sequencing and timing of the multitude of things that go on prior to the ceremony (hair, make up, dress, formals, does the coordinator keep the wedding party members on track with the stuff they are involved with pre-ceremony) as well as how the coordinator will assist in keeping everything moving with proper sequencing and timing as the ceremony begins and later as the reception begins. Something to also find out is if the coordinator has worked the venue and worked with the caterer, photographer, videographer and music provider before. If not, talk to the coordinators about how they interface with other vendors and what they see their role being in that regard.
You “day of” person can do as much or as little as you like - from orchestrating the day as Michael describes above to just hanging out at the venue “day of” to receive the flowers, greet the caterer, final set up plans, etc. FDIL’s mom recently met with a “day of” person and I believe she is going to hire her for the day - I was thrilled to hear this - less stress but more affordable then a wedding coordinator for the whole planning period.
My thought of a great use of a “day of” coordinator would be to hire a Non-Family Member, someone who can assert his/her authority over any crazy aunt or overbearing guest who tries to bully the wedding party to get their own way. I would imagine a family friend or younger person might be intimidated by an older person trying to throw their weight around.
Wedding Day Emotions can get even a more “normal” person cranked up… like “what do you mean, the bride isn’t going to carry the family bible as she walks down the aisle. Every bride for the last 10 generations of our family has done this. I better go talk some sense into her before she makes a huge mistake.” That’s where a non-relative who is being paid to smooth things out will earn his/her wages, talking the relative down and keeping the bride happy.
Some venues require a professional day-of coordinator be hired as part of the contract, and specifically mention no relatives or friends!
One venue we (briefly) considered required a day-of coordinator. $900 in suburban DC. That was just for one day of services, one pre-wedding meeting, and only for the part of the wedding that was taking place at the venue. They also required the use of their catering contractors and florists, plus their charge for the venue.
Yikes Countingdown, that seems wildly excessive.
Our D’s co-ordinatior was also the florist and moonlighted as a dispatcher at a town car co. We got discounts all the way around.
$900 is within range of what my D. has been quoted thus far. This isn’t a requirement for her… just an option. But I know that it’s more than just a greet & smile type of job – certainly my daughter is going to expect her money’s worth.
Glad I am the MOG. The day of coordinator talk is stressing me out.
I finally did start a checklist. I think it’s easy for the tasks to stack up on the groom’s side because there is “not much” to do. But just the having friends and family fly in from two different airports staying at three different hotels is plenty for a mere mortal to keep track of. (Yes there is an “official” hotel but there is a good reason for each group to be where they are.)
@missypie, I’m MOG too - I don’t have a checklist! Maybe I should! Care to share what kind of things are on your “to do” list??? I’m firming up the bbq caterer for the casual rehearsal dinner this week. Have been getting other supplies and decorative items for that dinner as well.
Need to buy the wedding shower gift which is in a couple of weeks - should I go for the Kitchen Aid mixer?
I did offer to make the hotel “treat” bags if people take advantage of the hotel rooms we blocked. But too soon for that.
One thing I need to get on - what my H is going to wear - ugh, he hates dressing up and will take NO responsibility ahead of time for it. Do FOG usually just wear a suit or something similar to what the groom/groomsmen are wearing???