Our shower was on the smaller side - probably 25-30 at the most in attendance. Most of both of our families are out of town - way out of town or out of country!
I’ll be honest, when it came to providing a list of who I wanted invited, the whole idea of wedding shower - essentially asking to come celebrate but to give another gift - felt kind of awkward to me. Which is why I kept my list small and just very close family and a couple of friends.
@walkinghome, your couple could register for smaller items - not every big item like crockpots, large coffee units, Kitchen Aid mixers, etc. that you have to figure out where/how to store! You can even put gift cards on your registry - great for later when they have more room perhaps.
Someone out there must have had a “tiny house” wedding shower, right?!
If you just don’t have space, register for “date night” gift cards or we even bought an amount toward a kayak for one relative. If you really don’t want stuff but someone really wants to give you a shower/party - ask for a no gift tea or coffee and dessert drop-in type thing or do a potluck and ask everyone to bring a favorite family recipe. Personal and fun but no gifts and not expensive for attendees.
@abasket “^^We had that game too - I didn’t play as I had looked at their registry”
They did a fun twist. The moms around me had also looked at the registry, so really we all had that advantage, except they collected cards and distributed them randomly. So BINGO game wa played with someone else’s card, and it was luck in how someone placed the items on the card- really it worked!
A lot of people, especially those who have been living on their own, do not have showers. The celebration is nice but the extra gift ask makes them uncomfortable. A co-ed wine shower, a recipe shower, an ornament shower, those can be fun. I find asking for gift cards distasteful, personally.
For those with limited need for more stuff, I like two different ideas. One is a recipe shower that could be accompanied by a small utensil to make the dish or a bottle of wine that would match the dish. The other is a Christmas ornament shower. Again, small items that could be contained in one box. The ornament shower is best given in the October - December timeframe.
I’m with you @abasket about the awkward nature of gift parties. I didn’t have any and D didn’t want any. She was overruled by MOG for a party we are attending in groom’s hometown this weekend, but otherwise no gift parties for her wedding. I have participated in showers as a hostess when that was the only opportunity to entertain for a friend’s child and given many shower gifts, but I feel like one wedding gift is enough. Before everyone attacks me, that’s just my personal feeling and I’ve learned there are no absolute rules regarding what is the right path.
@Consolation, we have cross posted. I completely agree with your statement on gift cards. One of my dear friends is the MOG next month and the wedding invite arrived a few weeks ago with a small card listing the registry locations and a note that the couple were accepting gift cards from a local home improvement store. While the STD usually notes the wedding website with registry information and party invitations sometimes note that, I have NEVER seen that before.
JUST dropped our caterer before they dropped us.D’s favorite restaurant, that gets rave reviews, was so flaky about responding to questions on the quote, that I dropped them. Who takes 2 weeks to respond to 4 calls and 2 emails?
So onward and upward. At least the bagpiper is booked!!
^ also had similar caterer situation for rehearsal dinner - a couple owns a catering company, spoke with the wife said three times she would send me menu within 48 hours. ( I didn’t even ask for it so fast, she offered). Five days later, I send a nice email reminder, and she sends me a fast reply, with a menu.
She offered to meet with us last weekend, ummmmmm, not following through on sending a custom menu, something she was adamant about, was a red flag. Moved on.
Reporting back from attending BHLDN sample sale http://www.bhldn.com/2016-wedding-dress-sample-sale/ We got two dresess for a total of $400! It was kind of fun once we got inside. The sale was held at a warehouse in South Philadelphia and when I got there at 8:15 there were about 100 people in line. They let groups of people inside starting at 9 am and we weren’t let in until about 9:45. I was there with my daughter and one of her best friends. Three people were about the minimum needed. Once we got in we headed for the rack of her small size dresses and she stripped down and started trying on dresses! Around us, a hundred young ladies were doing the same thing. No mirrors so everyone took pictures on their cell phones. It was crazy, but no ripping dresses out of anyone’s hands or loud screams. Lots and lots of smiles.
@musicamusica- You’re daughter is so thoughtful! I just told my D about her plans and she said although the trend among the younger musicians now seems to be smaller wedding parties- just one or a couple of attendants- there are still those who expect their friends to make the rounds of several parties, shell out for gowns and travel half way across the country, and she (my D) has had to turn down several invitations because she simply can’t afford it. She’s driving to two weddings this summer that are within a couple of hours- friends can carpool- but one is a very close friend and the others are a couple she performs with regularly. These things get expensive!!
I think having no shower(s) is perfectly fine, but sometimes ‘people’ (oh, those people) insist on having some type of shower and the best way to control the stuff is to make the theme very specific. I like the wine idea. Consumables is another idea, such as delivered dinners, fruit of the month club, a basket with spaghetti & sauce, cooking lessons at a local store. You could have a ‘tiny’ shower and ask that all gifts be no bigger than a shoe box
Years ago my friend’s brother got married and the neighbors wanted to throw a shower for him, so the theme was ‘garage’ and the kids all bought him tools like a wrench or hammer. I think he got a trash can and a hose and it was really cute.
I really like the idea of a themed shower. I’ve talked to two of my daughters good friends and both seemed disappointed at the no shower idea, so maybe we’ll cook up a little something that we know she would enjoy but wouldn’t fill their place up. You all have the best ideas!
Just hit the jackpot. The rehearsal dinner centerpieces are going to be potted herbs ( in an Italian restaurant, with table runners and votive candles .). Trader Joes had potted herb gardens in s perfect size for $6.99 each. Bought 14. Done (as long is I can keep them alive for 12 days ).
@missypie - That is an excellent idea! That made me think if there was something like that we could use for centerpieces at my daughters wedding in late November. It seems that’s the time of year that TJ’s has little rosemary trees. I wonder if we could use them? Maybe string them with mini white lights? Or would that be too big?