25 ways to Eff with your roomate

<p>got this from someone’s xanga site…</p>

<li><p>Sit up. Say, “time to make the donuts.” Leave. Do this often.</p></li>
<li><p>Every five minutes, get up, open the door, peek out, close the door and look relieved.</p></li>
<li><p>Express an extreme fear of sunlight. Move away from and flinch at areas of the room that are sunny.</p></li>
<li><p>Pick up the phone every five minutes and say, “hello.” Look confused and hang up.</p></li>
<li><p>Unwrap a candy bar. Eat the wrapper and throw the chocolate away.</p></li>
<li><p>When listening to the radio, sing along with different lyrics and a different tune.</p></li>
<li><p>Address your roommate by a different name every time you talk to him or her</p></li>
<li><p>Constantly drink from an empty glass.</p></li>
<li><p>Every time you handle something of your roommate’s, use a tissue or gloves.</p></li>
<li><p>While unlocking your door with the key, complain that the engine won’t start.</p></li>
<li><p>Name your animal crackers. Mourn for them after you eat them.</p></li>
<li><p>Get a pet rabbit. At a designated time every day, take the rabbit into the bathroom and engage in loud shouting matches. If your roommate inquires, refuse to discuss the situation.</p></li>
<li><p>Try to make meals using your roommate’s electric blanket.</p></li>
<li><p>Put black tape over the eyes of the people in your roommate’s pictures. Complain that they were staring at you.</p></li>
<li><p>Everytime your roommate falls asleep, wait ten minutes, wake him or her up and say, “it’s time to go to bed now.”</p></li>
<li><p>Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate’s potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate’s potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, “He just didn’t belong.”</p></li>
<li><p>Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.</p></li>
<li><p>Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, “The hair, it’s growing. Growing!”</p></li>
<li><p>Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you’re doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, “Soon, soon…”</p></li>
<li><p>Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.</p></li>
<li><p>Tell your roommate, “I’ve got an important message for you.” Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can’t remember what the message was. Later on, say, “Oh, yeah, I remember!” Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.</p></li>
<li><p>While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.</p></li>
<li><p>Make a sandwich. Don’t eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, “Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?” Complain loudly that you are hungry.</p></li>
<li><p>Every time your roommate walks in yell, “Hooray! You’re back!” as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, “Shouldn’t you be going somewhere?”</p></li>
<li><p>Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, “No, I want to watch them suffer.”</p></li>
</ol>

<p>very silly</p>

<p>Very funny.</p>

<p>HAHAHAHAHAHAAH! I like the animal cracker one!</p>

<p>Yet another excellent argument for executing anyone with a xanga site.</p>

<p>There was a similar</a> thread a bit earlier that was amusing (posts #1 and 8). This</a> list is also pretty good.</p>

<p>Nice....that could be pretty fun, especially the singing one!</p>

<ol>
<li>Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."</li>
</ol>

<p>I love that one.</p>

<p>^ HAHA, me too.</p>

<p>I love the fainting one:</p>

<ol>
<li>Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.</li>
</ol>

<p>60 seconds.....</p>

<p>dear lord, I must be really immature cuz i laughed at almost every single one of these. I love this OCD/schitzophrenic roomate! lol</p>

<p>Same here. I laughed out loud silly. I like these and may actually try them:</p>

<ol>
<li><p>When listening to the radio, sing along with different lyrics and a different tune.</p></li>
<li><p>Address your roommate by a different name every time you talk to him or her</p></li>
<li><p>Constantly drink from an empty glass.</p></li>
</ol>

<p>A friend of mine had a roommate once that did sharpen his knife every night...seriously. It was a summer thing, and he only had him for a week, thank goodness.</p>

<p>
[quote]
3. Express an extreme fear of sunlight. Move away from and flinch at areas of the room that are sunny.

[/quote]
OMG, this is exactly how my roommate his. He's really fond of the dark...I don't know why :confused:

[quote]
15. Everytime your roommate falls asleep, wait ten minutes, wake him or her up and say, "it's time to go to bed now."

[/quote]
haha, I should do this one. He always falls asleep in the afternoons at his desk...probably since he keeps his blinds shut and his side of the room is dark, lol.</p>

<ol>
<li>Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer." </li>
</ol>

<p>^HAAHAHAH i LOVE this one...i think i will try it at debate camp this summer :P</p>

<ol>
<li>Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer." </li>
</ol>

<p>I already do this with my pens/pencils when they fall off my desk.</p>

<p>Do you guys have roommates yet? </p>

<p>The best ways to actually **** them off would just be to sleep on their bed, pour water on it, and then say you have bladder problems. </p>

<p>Or you could sexile him/her but never bring a girl/guy back. Keep doing this and saying each time "Yea she's coming dude, get out! Don't ruin this for me". </p>

<p>Finally you could get alcohol and have it laying all around the room. My roommate wouldn't mind but if you had an anti-social do-gooder it would definitely make him/her mad.</p>

<p>I like those ideas. I'm gonna practice w/ my older sister, hehehe...</p>

<p>Okay, so I was literally rolling on the floor laughing while I was reading those and had tears in my eyes. It probably shouldn't be so funny, but seriously...
Name your Animal Crackers. Mourn for them after you eat them.
I am definitely gonna do that, its hilarious.</p>

<ol>
<li>Every five minutes, get up, open the door, peek out, close the door and look relieved.</li>
</ol>

<p>Unfortunately one of my roommate's already does this-- he walks out of the room (no joke) at least 50-70 times a day sometimes 20-30 times in a row.. the door resembles an earthquake everytime it closes. He goes to the bathroom b/c I can hear the bathroom door open and close across the hall. Either he has severe bladder problems or he's incredibly narcississtic (i hear he likes to look at himself in the mirror in there). I'm hoping its the latter...</p>