<p>Frankly, I was not participating in preparing my kids for college anyhow and I did not choose their classes either. I would say, let your kid be a High Schooler in all aspects of it. If they need help, they ask or a parent can tell if something is not right. Other than that, I was just driving my D. to her after school activities every day as she was one of the youngest in her class and got her license as one of the last. But she got it few days after she turned 16 and I was off the hook driving her everywhere. That was the extend of my participation other than her asking us few times (including while in college) to assist in academics. I did make sure that she prepared for her ACT though, but that was much later. She enced up graduating #1 in her private HS and one reason probably was that we were not bothering her too much about her HS academics and college. We did talk about future way back in middle school, since she was looking for career with horrible job prospects (marine Bio). That kind of resolved on its own in HS, since she discovered that she loves Bio the most out of her science classes. So, the natural progression of this discovery was going for pre-med. I would say, unless there is some kind of tragic events, sickness or disaster (hopefully none of it will happen), stay away and support / help / assist with whatever they cannot do at a time (apparently, they cannot drive at 14, as one example). </p>
<p>I’m going to echo some other posters, and say he needs s foreign language (and you’ve said that social studies is already covered). EC’s are important too, and I have found that counselors (at least the ones here) don’t start emphasizing that until it’s pretty much too late. Have him identify a few interests in 9th grade and explore them, continue on with what he enjoys, and possibly take on some type of leadership role as a junior or senior. </p>
<p>Read the school handbook and learn how the school figures GPA/class rank, every school does this differently I didn’t know how this worked at our school until mid term and had I been better informed I might have advised D to take different classes. I had no idea about weighted and unweighted GPA.</p>
<p>Also plan out a testing schedule. Find out what, if any tests your school requires and when they are given. My kids don’t do any testing in 9th grade but they know that they will take the PSAT in Oct of 10th and 11th grade, that the school requires them to take the PLAN in 10th grade and ACT in April of 11th grade. My kids also take the SAT twice, once in 10th and 11th grade and any SAT 2 subject test after they complete the corresponding course. We don’t do any test prep in 9th grade but it helps with long term planning to know when/if these tests will happen.</p>
<p>Don’t underestimate the importance of the PSAT! Read up on National Merit in the Financial Aid & Scholarship section.</p>
<p>I was reading this thread last night and looked up How To Be A High School Superstar on our lib website. Turns out there is an ebook so I borrowed it and ended up staying up way too late reading it. I-)
It is interesting and illuminating. But kind of disheartening that all his anecdotes seem to be of well-off kids. Still a lot of basic principles to think of as a parent. Can’t imagine my 8th grader reading it though.</p>
<p>I agree that the book is not applicable for most of the kids. The idea and the principal is there, but the execution is just so hard in reality. </p>
<p>You should run some net price calculators on state schools or others you’re aware of (probably 5) to see what they cost generally so that YOU can know what you can afford. Also get a great score on the PSAT.</p>
<p>PSAT by far is not the end of the world at all. D. did not get a good score, was not a semi-finalist or any of this. Ended up on full tuition Merit award for all 4 years in college and then plus more in the last 2 years, based on her HS GPA and ACT score. She did not prepare for PSAT, but prepared for about 5 hours for ACT and the difference in results was huge.</p>
<p>Do not try to choose classes to enhance a gpa. Colleges will figure out their own gpa, often an unweighted one- ie no extras for Honors, AP classes like many HS’s do. Consider the numbers and types of courses needed for colleges (eg foreign language) and let your son choose what he wants while meeting college admissions guidelines. Your son’s guidance counselor should be helpful with that.</p>
<p>As your son progresses he will have more and more input into his chosen courses. Remember it is HIS life and he needs to be in charge of it. Do monitor him for changes- my son became bored and his grades dropped from a 4.0 as he wasn’t as engaged as he was freshman year. Watch his internet sites as he explores the web. It seems as though all boys, even well behaved/smart et al ones, try out the nasty sites. They are very capable of hiding what they are doing unless you have good computer skills. Watch out for too much gaming. Your little boy is growing up and will rebel in various ways as he reaches for independence. Remember the terrible twos? Well, he may have already embraced the terrible teens, and different methods of guiding him are needed. You have an emerging adult, exciting but also stressful many times. School based extracurricular activities are a wonderful way for him to explore interests and spend his time.</p>
<p>Also just make sure he keeps up his grades…</p>
<p>and does he have any extracurriculars he is interested in? Colleges prefer that you do fewer activities more in depth than many superficially.</p>
<p>Wow, some great advice from several of you. Good to see the wide range of passion (some even off the charts) from parents, even the unnecessary advice on pornography habits and child rearing. But it’s cool, I know it’s all coming from people who care, and that’s awesome. :)</p>
<p>For our Freshman year we’ll be staying close to his academic counselor, but for the most part be allowing him to acclimate into 9th grade and just enjoy his first year in high school. We’re not going to apply anymore pressure than he’s already experiencing. He’s got a lot on his plate, including 3 honors classes, I think that’s enough for now. We’ll start discussing academic options to give him a more competitive edge for college sometime later next year, but even then, we’ll do it without undue pressure and give him the majority of the decision making and input. That’s the plan for now. Thank you all so much!</p>
<p>Let your kid be a kid. He’ll never get these years back.</p>
<p>@fullload - I am a planner and I do not think 9th grade is too early to start planning. You can do this without alerting your child.</p>
<p>My recommendations (most were already mentioned)</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Run Net Price Calculators - start with your state flagship, an out of state public and a private. Biggest issue of college applications is the parents not understanding the financial process. Then kids apply to dream schools or schools recommended. Parents finally catch on January - March of senior year. By then the student has been accepted and now can’t afford to go.</p></li>
<li><p>Understand the Federal Student Loan limits.</p></li>
<li><p>PSAT - It is important in the merit hunt, but not the end of the world. Too many of our local schools tell the kids it is not important at all. This is just not true. It IS important for kids who can score high. Treat it as you would the SAT.</p></li>
<li><p>Understand SAT II - Best time to take these is as the corresponding course ends.</p></li>
<li><p>Understand AP classes and Exam costs. Most schools around us require the student take the exam if they take the course AND the student pays for exam. One schools near us require the student pays for the text books.</p></li>
<li><p>Did I mention money? As a parent, understanding the AP, SAT II, SAT, ACT, application fees and fee for applying for financial aid may be very important. You may need the 9th and 10th grade years to understand the fees you’ll incur in the 11th and 12th grade years.</p></li>
<li><p>My DS1 is what I call a “scratch and sniff” kid. He needs to see, feel, smell to make a decision. DS2 is more of a cyber shopper. In our family, it was important to start “informal” college visits early in high school so DS1 got a feel for the type of campus he wanted. We started by doing summer programs at colleges, attending plays and sporting events on campuses. Basically, no pressure visits that gave DS1 an idea of various types of campuses. We live in a region that has a high number of colleges, so this was easy for us to do.</p></li>
<li><p>Know the minimum requirements for your state flagship and in your case a few art schools. KEEP WORK. My DS1 was notorious for trashing everything. If your kid decides on Art school a portfolio will likely be needed. Put him in the habit NOW to keep things and photograph things.</p></li>
<li><p>Finally - The Guidance Counselors often give poor advice due to ignorance or outdated info. Educate yourself on the college process. Do NOT trust that they will do it for your student.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>All of these decisions should be done by a student, not a parent. Parent job is to provide support, not to interfere. Do the laundry, cook the dinner, take your HS’er to ECs, buy a car when age appropriate,…etc. and leave a kid alone in regard to acedimics, ECs…,unless asked to assist. You are not going to be there at college anyway. If they do not learn how to accomplish whatever on thier own, are you going to be there in a dorm with them?</p>
<p>"reading all the posts from these very VERY high-achieving and driven students and parents.’ - Actually you may find out that the most highly-achieving (#1’s ) are there because parents did not interfere, because they choose what and how to do and because it was their own decision, they stick to their plans (their OWN PLANS) much better than those who were driven by their parents. </p>
<p>I think many of the suggestions above are good. You don’t want to get overinvolved in the process in 9th grade, but for many families, your kids’ college education will be one of the biggest expenditures you will ever make. Reasonable planning makes sense. Understanding the finances is very important, and parents have to do this. Also, I think understanding the testing schedule is important for parents. 9th graders may not have a long view, and may need some encouragement to understand what is important for long-term success.</p>
<p>But this doesn’t mean that parents should do things like try to pick the “best” ECs for their kids, or to push them into certain subject areas. For things like that, what parents should do is encourage kids to find what interests them, and to further encourage them to do their best at the things they choose.</p>
<p>Never try to factor in being new. Classes offered to freshmen are what they can handle- the best students can jump right in with a full load. Do not do your planning for a “competitive edge”. Instead concentrate on his maxing out his individual potential with consideration for his abilities and interests. That will lead to his performing his best and getting the best grades he can while enjoying his life at this stage. He will then be competitive for colleges that are appropriate for him. Relax for now and pay attention to post #30. </p>
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<p>You are joking, right? Our kids did their own laundry, cooked meals with us and for us, and we did not buy a car for THEM…but they were able to use one of our cars. Life skills which they took with them to college and beyond.</p>
<p>To the OP, we offered suggestions to our kids, and gave them support in their endeavors. In. Our case, our kids had pretty solid interests by 9th grade. And our school had a pretty firm curriculum that exceeded the state graduation requirements.</p>
<p>I expected my kids to take the most challenging classes they could handle in required courses and to take whatever electives they wanted. ECs were also up to them. Though the school tried to get kids to be careful about taking too many honors or APs, we always figured they could drop to a regs course more easily than switch to an advanced course. I was not averse to them getting a B in a tough course. The kids wanted to take the most challenging courses so I didn’t have to persuade them. </p>
<p>Sometimes they made choices I wouldn’t have made in course selection or ECs, but I just let it go. A big part of high school is learning how to make choices and to try new things. Yes, I would say "are you sure you want to drop band/add Model UN/whatever, but those were choices best made by the kids. </p>
<p>Do you know much about art yourself, OP? I know nothing. If my kids had chosen to go to an arts magnet, that part of their education would have been out of my hands. </p>
<p>As far as what to read about college, you have received some great advice. Think about costs now. You might want to steer your child in a certain direction or reset his expectations based on what you can pay. The other stuff will reveal itself over time. </p>
<p>My suggestion would be to keep a list of all EC’s, awards, and volunteer hours… because you will have to be able to list them for admissions and scholarships. It gets hard to remember when you are involved in so many things over 4 years.
Have your child learn those life skills like how to get stains out of shirts, and wash clothes. After your child can drive, let them drive to the doctor alone. Teach them how to manage a checking account. These are skills your child can start now before senior year gets crazy.</p>
<p>“After your child can drive, let them drive to the doctor alone” Really? Not sure about your doctor but I very much doubt ours would treat an unaccompanied minor. I know my signature was required for my 17 year old even to get a booster on a vaccination I had previously signed off on.</p>