A Jazzy Journal - another musician's journey

College Majors Music Major
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GoForth was so generous of his time and wisdom to share in his journey. And it’s his vision that this board have a journal of our journey with our musician of the college/conservatory tours, pre-screens, final auditions and decisions. So - I’m doing my part. It will certainly not be as eloquent and I likely won’t be preparing the COA spreadsheets that he was so good at - but hopefully another parent will glean something from the journey.

Like GoForth’s son, our daughter is a bassist. She started out as a celloist in the 5th grade - and when no one volunteered to play the bass, our daughter raised her hand. I had no idea that this would ultimately mean that our family vehicles would need to accomodate such a goliath of an instrument! When we moved from CA to SC at the end of that year, her first best friend was the other bassist at her elementary school - so it served her well. She rarely practiced - but when she auditioned and didn’t get into the local School of the Arts (we learned later they had no spots) a fire was lit. The following year, she got into the school and the instructor was one of those gems that you can only dream that your son or daughter would have. He went on to coach her smallish public school to winning the #1 public school orchestra in the nation at the NAfME’s annual convention. We were blessed!

About this time, our daughter decided that she wanted to go to a serious music camp called Brevard Institute. She auditioned and didn’t think she had much of a chance - but was waitlisted - and ultimately got in as a freshman in high school. That summer changed the course of her ship. She became friends with two very serious musicans there (cello and violin) and practiced so much that her shoulder ached by the end of the 6 weeks. She was hooked! The Boston Pops conductor spent a week conducting the orchestra - and she was moved by the pieces to the point of tears. Friends, emotion and a sense of belonging all fueled her passion. She asked me at the end of that summer to find her a place that she could go full-time just like Brevard - since she didn’t want to leave.

So - we began to search. We looked at UNCSA where she found an amazing classical bassist instructor. She didn’t want to look at Interlocken since she heard that you had to wear a uniform. She heard about Colburn - and practiced to the point of exhaustion - submitted an audition tape and was invited to a live audition. The instructor there said he was so impressed with her video (one of the Bach Suites) that he played it for his Cincinatti Symphony bassist friend and they both were wowed. By this point, she was also dabbling a bit with jazz at her Arts School in SC and was the bassist in their Big Band. We flew to Colburn and she had a less than stellar 3 minute audition. Her triplet brother auditioned at the same time for the ballet school. I had a dream of the two of them being in the same school. But alas, it wasn’t to be. Colburn accepted no basses into their high school program (which turned out to be a blessing - as her ship was about to turn).

During the course of her visit to Colburn, she learned about the Community Program there which incorporated both classical and jazz. And we learned about the Los Angeles School of the Arts - where she applied to and was accepted. So - we moved to CA (we had lived there prior to SC and were glad to go back).

For the last year, she has been emersed in both classical and jazz. Her shoulder began acting up again (the old Brevard one) especially when she bowed with classical. She joined a jazz ensemble at her school and finally began to study jazz theory and had private lessons from a local jazz bassist. At this point - she decided to focus on jazz. She still dabbles in classical - but it hurts her shoulder - and I suspect that her love of jazz has also taken hold. They say that the brains of jazz and classical musicians are different. I can understand that - and I think hers is more a jazz brain. I’ll never forget seeing her play jazz for the first time - she looked happy and like her body was at one with the music. She looked “in the zone” - the epitome of happiness (according to the Happy Movie which I dragged my kids to go see much to their chagrin). In addition to Idylwild Summer Camp last summer, she also went to Stanford Jazz Camp - but she had a somewhat bad experience with being hit on by several jazz musicians in a not so flourished and chivalrous way. Something that she never encountered in SC. Jazz is certainly a male dominated area and she has experienced several of the downsides of being a minority, this being only one of them.

So - here we are. She is a junior in high school - just marking time in academics to play music - particularly jazz. She has several friends from both SC and LA who are at Berklee School of Music so she thinks that’s where she wants to go - but after doing research on here, I’m trying to open her mind up to other options with good jazz programs. Her instructor in SC went to MSM so that’s on her list, NEC, the New School and Eastman…and mom’s trying to enourage her to look at Oberlin and Frost (for financial considerations - my hubby is disabled so cost is a factor for us). And there’s Cal Arts which she doesn’t know much about but that a bassist that she admires at her school is going to. She’s applied to the Summer Program at Berklee and will hear today if she received the women in jazz scholarship. She is also dabbling in contemporary music - playing with a few local LA bands. (she plays electric bass but is more comfortable with upright).

If she goes to Berklee this summer, we hope to tour a few college/conservatories near there: MSM, the New School, NEC - even if it’s in the summer and not indicative of the usual - and set up trial lessons if the instructors are around. She will start working on pre-screen auditions and hopes to have them done by Sept./Oct. And the dreaded SAT/ACT (she is not academically inclined and would gladly by pass this step).

I have learned so much from purusing the boards here. So much collective wisdom to be had. I think the thing that is most striking to me right now after reading the “Tours…Decisions” is that music schools are not as generous with scholarships as academically focused schools. Be sure to have “safeties” on the list. And it’s OK to take a year or two from the traditional college/conservatory progression. And GoForth’s journal taught me to look at the COA - not just the scholarship or tuition - but the bottom line. It feels like an all consuming, anxiety producing exercise - but to try and enjoy it along the way. Easier said than done for me, a triplet mom with an aviation inclined daughter and a ballet boy (who has been blessed with being at the New York City Ballet’s school (SAB) - so lots of balls in the air. And a likely overload of college tours and applications over the next year. I’m so glad that I’m not alone in this journey.

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We do fit 3 adults, a 3/4 upright bass, and an amp in a 2016 Honda Fit.

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This is not a popular opinion, but I wonder if we do our kids a disservice by revealing so much about them. I think it is important to get their permission and let them read everything that we post if they so desire.

The other issue is that these “journey” threads contain so much great info but it is buried in100+ pages and hard for newbies to access.

This forum can serve many functions, and connecting with other parents for support is certainly one of them, but that can be done via PM’s in some cases.

I think that offering information to new parents and students is very important so having separate distinct threads on various topics seems to work well for that, rather than mega threads that start out as sort of diaries.

In other words, experienced parents can answer questions directly if threads are posted with those questions. Reading an entire year’s experience can be wonderful but it takes a lot of time and slogging through info that is not relevant.

Just something to think about. I am long past the undergrad application stage and may sound like a curmudgeon but with the longer view, I tend to think about newbies mainly and how they can best learn about the process.

Certainly the journal threads help with that but the net result is fewer discussion threads that target specific questions and a lot of material to read through!

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@GoForth We have a midsize SUV for our Drummer S (Senior) and Upright Bass Player S (Junior). We can barley fit three people with that set up. My Junior S is no longer interested in sticking with Upright which is a shame since there is a lack of Bass players in our area but continues to lug it around for HS.

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@compmom TOTALLY AGREE!!! IMO way too much personal info is being shared and College Confidential used to discourage talking about scholarship $$. My child would not be thrilled if I were sharing all his experiences.

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Why does everyone assume that their own experiences and those of their own kid automatically translates to everyone else? No where did I see in the CC rules that there should be no discussion of scholarships. No one has used any names here either. We are all adults. My daughter knows I post about her on CC. That’s how we have made the friends and connections that we have. She is fine with it. If somebody figures out who she is then so what. I’m not using her name. Nobody is using names. You’ve made your points repeatedly and if you are unhappy with the comments on the thread then please feel free not to participate.

PS. I edited and tempered my tone to abide my forum rules of being courteous

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https://auth.collegeconfidential.com/module.php/hobsonspolicies/policy.php?policy=forumrules

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I have posted about this issue only once before, around this time last year. I honestly wish someone had posted it when I first started here 11 years ago.

The main message was simply that separate threads about specific topics may be easier to access than info buried in a thread that is 100 pages long. These long threads are an entirely new thing and if people enjoy it, great.

The privacy issue is individual and varies from family to family.
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Personally, as someone newer, I like perusing both options. I’m not sure I have the time to do a whole thread on our journey but I appreciate others who have. I read through the entire GoForth thread and it was very helpful to me and it was nice to see the process laid out entirely in that format. I also like to be able to search on particular schools etc via search. Those key word searches still come up on the longer threads. I think families can independently assess any privacy issues they have. I have also received amazingly generous information and recommendations via PM. I have extreme gratitude for those who’ve shared.

I don’t think it’s weird at all sharing information about who might be generous with merit. These colleges have us over a barrel these days. I’d prefer not to spend thousands of dollars travelling for auditions that will result in offers that are always going to be close to full fare. It’s understandable why some wouldn’t want to share at all or who might just share generally. I’m grateful for any and all info in that regard. ETA - I can tell you in a year’s time I will be more than willing to share our info and results in one form or another.

I personally have thought about starting a private board somewhere for parents going through this journey where there were less privacy concerns. There is a private board for parents of musical teens on FB, but it’s also a commercial board with no links allowed and heavy college talk seems to get shut down pretty fast. I like that board, but it’s not exactly what I need going into this process. I may keep thinking on that.

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I agree. I also think it’s up to each individual to make the call on how much/little to share, whether or not to follow blogs or mega threads, etc. There is no single right answer. As @goforth said, we are adults and, other than following the site guidelines, it is not appropriate for us to dictate what may work for another parent. I for one am thrilled at current, detailed information generously provided by other parents — that is why I’m here, frankly. I hope to give the same value to those who come after me.

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@MusakParent I had been on that FB page for a minute and a half then got really turned off by it and ditched it. I felt it was more of a page for parents surfing for compliments on their kid or just plain bragging rights and nothing useful. And I agree with every single thing that you said. I think privacy is a very individual definition. I am not a very private person but many of my friends are. My daughter is well aware of my comments on this board and that is precisely how we have narrowed our college list for her. And I also agree that scholarships can be all over the place. I think that what you find is “typical” at a particular school tends to be the case with outliers being exactly that as well. We knew NEC wasn’t a school that was typically generous scholarship wise but we knew of 2 jazz vocalists there on what we were told was a full ride so we figured it was worth a shot. But as happy as D was with admission there, the offer was the typical amount so while it was disappointing, we can’t say it was unexpected.

I think it is ALL very useful information to have. Had we really thought it through and felt confident that D would get the typical offer we may not have bothered in spending the money to travel to Boston. We don’t regret the decision at all, but again, we went in eyes wide open and that is 100% due to people sharing experiences and scholarship amounts on this board.

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The journal format is new for sure. New things aren’t always welcomed right away. I recall my not-enjoyed encounters with this as well:

http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/discussion/comment/20858675/#Comment_20858675

http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/discussion/comment/20859912/#Comment_20859912

I think it works for some of us. It helps me to focus on a new person’s chain of events instead of searching for all of their past posts to recall what their situation is. It also creates some focus - you see many of the journals are jazz-oriented, and the often seen reply in a generic thread is “I think such and such, but I’m from the classical world, so maybe jazz is different.” The journal brings context for a person’s situation.

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FWIW, I am an ‘oldie’ (who used to be a very regular member here) and haven’t posted in awhile, but I am in agreement with compmom. There is a lot of personal and quite specific information being shared on this website–more than used to be on CC a few years ago. I can easily discern the identity of many a child parents are talking about simply by googling. I guess I might be labeled as a ‘curmudgeon’ now–yikes–but I do feel a twinge every time I read so much personal information being posted. That seems to be the way of the world now–privacy is not such a concern anymore with so much social media. Yes, we are all adults–but as parents I think we need to be careful to protect our children, at least while they are still minors and in our care. Not meaning to judge, just to provide a gentle word of caution. I simply felt the need to come out of the woodwork and voice this after I read compmom’s post.

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As a total noob to this process along with this board, I’m seeing the benefit of both types of posts (topical and journaled). Discoverability and searchability are much better on topical posts and they do (for the most part) stay focused. Journals give you the insight that comes from following one person’s story from start to finish (or finish to start depending on when you joined).

Now the fact that the two most robust and prolific journals are both chronicling jazz related applicants who were/are looking at schools that are relevant to my daughter next year dramatically increased the relevance of wading through those posts to me. For others I could see that feeling like too much work.

The one thing I am slightly confused by is this “privacy” discussion. Is the sensitivity driven by the discussion of finances? Or less than favorable opinions about schools that could be found and cross-referenced by admissions teams? Those two make sense to me. Some people don’t want their financial situation broadly known, other people couldn’t care less. And for the most part I see very few people trash talking schools they are still trying to gain admission to. Common sense. I know I’ll never post anything but positive views of the schools we visit. If we don’t think a school is a fit we’ll keep it to ourselves. I mean why “yuck somebody else’s yum” as the saying goes?

But if it’s not those two issues, what is it? There are literally hundreds of videos of my D playing live out there. Both on YouTube and FB. I mean she plays out all the time. And she and her friends use social media to get gigs, to promote, etc. And I assume many of your kids do the same.

So am I right in assuming the privacy conversation is not about the public profile of our kids as musicians but really just concern about cross-referencing that persona with college admission process related to the financials or negative feedback on certain schools?

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Hello all - I can see both sides of this. I understand the privacy issue - my daughter knows that I post here - and I’m sure shrugs her shoulders - but everything I send her from here (without any identifying info) of advice and words of wisdom that I have received - she gobbles down. I belong to both a private ballet (for our son) and music one (for our daughter) that is just a vehicle for the founders to sell their services. It gets to be a bit much. I started a private FB page - but didn’t have the time or inclination to go out an recruit members so it’s dying on the vine. To be honest, I think I feel fairly safe on here because I don’t get the sense that more than a handful of music parents are on here. I could be wrong - but I wouldn’t think that those that are out of the melee of the college/conservatory tours are on here - and the ones that I have come across that are - do it to help. So - I have no fear that anyone will use the info. against my daughter. And in fact, I feel like there is a band of parents cheering her on. Maybe I am naive - but that’s the sense that I get.

I also know that when I learned as much as I could about the ballet world for our son - and shared with him “nuggets” about how it all worked - has done wonders for his budding career. The ballet and music worlds are so difficult - that learning as much as you possibly can - can help immensely. The connections, the failure and successes of others - all help in forging a path.

I know that when I first started on here - I read GoForth and BassDad’s journal until the wee hours. I was thirsty to understand the journey as I felt like I had absolutely no idea where to start (and I didn’t!). In an ideal world, we would leave this to our kids - but not all are researchers - or even have that inclination. That is one thing that I enjoy doing - so it’s my contribution to their journey.

So - there you go. Can someone explain to me how blogging about my daugher’s journey could hurt her? Perhaps I’m missing something? My only hesitation is that I’m not sure that I know enough about where we are headed to be of interest to anyone - but hopefully we will learn along the way and share some tidbits.

Now - I will get on with my blog. I have some good news that I will share in the next post.

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So - we got the most amazing news yesterday! Our daughter did NOT get the female in jazz scholarship at Berklee for the summer. She got the main jazz workshop scholarship!!! The one she didn’t she had a shot at! She is over the moon!!! They said that she can still participate in the women’s one (they will discuss the challenges of being female in the jazz world) - but she will be in the jazz group at Berklee this summer that plays together and gets to perform at the Newport Jazz festival!! She is beyond excited…

I will post this over in the Journey thread because so many of your astute parents are over there - but my next question (you can see this coming)…does anyone know a student that got the Berklee Jazz Workshop scholarship? How have any of these students fared for the full-time program?

I know that we only had to wait for a month or so to hear about the summer program scholarship - but it felt like forever. Good training for next year…

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Congratulations to your D @tripletmama ! What a super groovy opportunity (trying to use jazzy terms, to keep up with you cool cats)!!!

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S and I always had fun watching the Adam Neely channel on Youtube, who is a working bassist who went to Berklee.

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GoForth - I will pass that along to dd. She has probably heard of him - but maybe not.

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@tripletmama Congratulations to your daughter for the wonderful offer!

I also feel that CC is a very helpful community and I’ve got great advice here, whether from postings or PMs. The university counselor of my son’s high school frowned a lot during our private meetings when I told him where we’re up to. He repeatedly told me to step back and let him navigate on his own! I couldn’t… and I think I’ll continue to do what I’ve been doing.

I look forward to reading more about your daughter’s journey.