Academic Dismissal

Well, this is incredibly embarrassing.I was informed that I was being dismissed from college a couple days ago. I am writing an appeal and would appreciate if someone could look over the letter for me. Thank you!

To Whom It May Concern,
My name is _____ _____ and majoring in Chemistry. I am writing to appeal my academic dismissal from _____ University. I was not surprised, but deeply upset to receive the letter of dismissal last week. Knowing the fact that I may not be able to further my education saddens me. However, it is my fault for not taking the responsibility for my coursework and having a low GPA.
I will admit, however, that over the course of May 2015 to May 2016 I had a very difficult time and it reflected in my grades. This is not to be used as an excuse but I would like to share and explain the circumstances.
When I first applied to ______ University I was overwhelmed with happiness that I was accepted. I had wanted to go here ever since I laid eyes on the campus, it is beautiful. As I started taking classes, I thought I could handle working too. I was wrong, which resulted in me failing Organic Chemistry and Fundamentals of Oral Communication. The next semester resulted in an academic warning. Unfortunately, I still did not learn my lesson as I still failed three of my classes and was put on academic probation. When this happened I confided in my parents who were, naturally, displeased. Over the summer I devised a plan to help me get back on track by retaking the classes that I had failed. Halfway through the summer something very personal and very upsetting happened to me. I emailed my advisor and asked if she had any suggestions on taking easier classes as to make sure I did not fail any. By the time the fall 2015 semester began, I was suffering from severe depression. I lacked the will to eat, go to class, and even go to work. I made an appointment with a psychologist at ___health center where the psychologist informed me that it would be easier to see someone off campus due to the number of students that needed to be seen. He told me that I needed to talk to someone right away. After doing research I found a woman who used to teach at _, her name is Dr. __. She met with me various times and helped me through my depression. Even after I met with her, it was not enough to save my schooling. I wound up withdrawing from two of my classes and failing another. Over winter break I retook the psychology class I had failed and got a B. My depression was improving but was still there. The next semester, spring 2016, was an improvement from the previous ones, however, it was still not great. There was one withdrawal and one D. My GPA was a 1.59. By June, my depression had gone away thanks to Dr. help and I devised a plan for fall 2016. I went into the semester with high hopes. When I needed help with my lab reports or had any questions I made sure to go to my professors and attended class regularly. Throughout the semester I was suffering from back pain and missed a couple classes. My teachers were understanding and I was able to make up my work. My Calculus teacher, Doctor __, was more than understanding and offered me an incomplete so that I could focus on the work I needed to make up and my health. By the end of the semester I saw that although I did not do poorly in my classes, my GPA was not raised enough to get to a 2.0, it stood at a 1.75. I know that when the calculus class and winter writing class are completed my GPA will be over a 2.0 and I will be in good academic standing.
That will not stop me from trying to better my grades, however. If granted the opportunity of one more semester, I plan on going to tutoring for my Physics II and Organic Chemistry II classes as well as seeking out help from my professors in all classes. This way I can receive a B or higher. I also signed up for the
Succeed program and intend to go. The German III class I am retaking next semester will also greatly improve my GPA and I know that once the semester is complete my GPA will certainly be above a 2.0. I hope you understand that I am not a bad student and having the low GPA that led to my dismissal does not reflect who I am. I should have sought out help sooner and never let the above circumstances interfere with my school work so deeply, and for that I take full responsibility.
I would like to thank you for taking the time to read my letter and I sincerely hope that you will give me a second chance at _____ University. It has been a rough road but I do know that things will continue to improve. Enclosed you can find a letter from Dr. _____ as well as the doctor’s notes sent to my professors this past fall semester.
Sincerely,


It sounds like you have had a tough time, but the letter is too long. Near the end, you are asking for a second chance but it appears you were given a second chance with the warning, a third chance with the probation, and now this is perhaps a fourth chance? The problem with your 99 problems approach is that even if you solve some of your problems you still have a lot of problems left. Have you thought about another option like taking some courses at a local community college or just taking a break for a semester?
Good luck!

I don’t have time to look at the whole thing right now but the first sentence alone leads me to believe it might have grammatical issues:

“My name is _____ _____ and majoring in Chemistry.”

Read it out loud to find where the mistakes are. That’s what I do.

@CheddarcheeseMN Thank you for your input! I have actually considered taking some courses at a local community college. It’s just that I am so close to a 2.0 and I know that with the incomplete I will be fine. I’m also a junior and have to have a certain amount of credits completed at the university in order to obtain a degree. I revised the letter and made it significantly shorter and focused on the depression I had rather than the other problem. Hopefully everything works out in the end.