They would be disappointed.
The only reason, and I quote, that they’re willing to spend THIS much on Yale is because I have a leg-up on more prestigious careers and graduate school.
I know that we would 100% have to take out a lot of loans for my education… but my parents’ understanding of that is “Biden will wipe it for us!”
You said up front $65k was too much. So Yale is a no go. If you got no aid at Yale it would have been unlikely at other Ivies too. None have merit. Some strong LACs do but they might have still gotten you to $50, $60k and likely still not affordable.
Where can you still apply - and who still has merit at this time.
I’d personally look to auto merit schools - you may not want to hear that but that is a reality for many smart kids.
If the NPC showed $65k up front and you knew it was not affordable, you needed to plan for this. If you didn’t and this don’t have an affordable alternative, then it’s this (auto merit - schools like Bama, Arizona ), community college, a gap year or perhaps finding a small LAC that’s still taking apps and offers merit at this late time.
Sorry
Ps kids make this decision all the time.
Again, all I can say is I am sorry and hard for you to be carrying this pressure. Also - are you sure the financial aid forms were filled out correctly ??? You could call Yale FA office and request a review - also remember FA is year by year, so aid can change each year.
I am glad you have this forum to vent and get support - hopefully you take all the positive commitments to heart about you and your abilities.
Yes, there are more affordable options still out there - but i am guessing that your parents will not allow you to apply or attend - I could be wrong.
You got into Yale. That’s a great accomplishment.
Yale sees enough income and assets for your parents to pay the full cost, and they are willing to do it. That’s very fortunate.
If you are concerned about your parent’s money, then get a job in investment banking or consulting for a few years after Yale and pay your parents back.
$300k is both a lot and not a lot when you can graduate making $150k in your first year. If you are a Big Law attorney, you’ll have more money a decade after law school than you know what to do with.
As a very smart kid, you might be overthinking this. Go to UCLA if you want to go to UCLA, but don’t decline Yale to go to a school you don’t want to go to.
While some student debt is going to be “wiped”, parental loans (which will be required for anything over $5k or so a year) aren’t going to be forgiven. If your parents want to take on this burden they need to understand that it isn’t going to magically disappear - and educational loan debt is not dischargeable in bankruptcy. It follows you forever.
This isn’t going to happen. Period.
I don’t have the bandwidth to write a comprehensive reply that would do justice to the subject, honestly.
A few things
-it carries social capital that follows you through your life (ie helps with certain professions; helps joining certain groups or clubs; etc)
-your peers are well connected, and their families may be able to help you. It used to be called the Good Old Boys network, only now women are included
sometimes opportunities find you. A prof might approach you about a summer research position that pays $500/week.
there’s funding for all sorts of programs/travel opportunities
. . . And that’s just a start.
Yeah, that’s what I’m taking.
IB seems like the best option… but if I’m being honest, it sounds like a miserable career. But it has the best safety net and I guess I’ll bite.
I want to become a lawyer, but if I’m being honest, I don’t know if I can score a top law school… or if my parents have enough money for that?
We were full pay for Yale, notwithstanding S had a pretty good merit scholarship to an honors program at the State flagship on par with UCLA. He chose Yale because it was a better fit and did not want to go to a massive sport obsessed flagship. He did apply and qualify for some relative small merit scholarships awarded locally/regionally and he did part time work at Yale. He also had some well paying internships over the summers. Finally, he was a freshmen counselor senior year so room and board were waived. So there are ways to chip at Yale’s costs.
What do you intend to do after college? If grad or professional school, UCLA is not going to be materially less advantageous than Yale. Saving the money may be better for the family. If you want to go into consulting/finance where a lot of the 6 figure jobs are, I think Yale creates an easier path. Still very doable with UCLA, but you are competing with many more classmates for proportionately fewer spots IMO.
Thank you for the reply 
I agree with all your points but how about the competition at Yale. Given that I’m competing with the best of the best, wouldn’t it be safe to say that these internships, research positions, and opportunities are also very hard to score?
Thank you for your input. It’s always nice hearing from someone directly from Yale.
I’m wondering how much that chipped Yale’s costs though. I’m unsure if working, becoming a freshmen counselor, or winning some regional scholarships will enough to get it down to the level of affordability I want it at.
What is your level of affordability. Yale costs over $80,000 a year.
One thing you could do is to look up the many threads here on CC, wherein students and/or their parents are seriously considering going into six figures of debt to cover the non-resident cost of UCLA. There are plenty of people who see UCLA (or Cal) as the be-all and end-all, just as your parents are thinking of Yale.
I’m not saying there’s no difference between the two student experiences. There’s more competition for resources at UCLA, for sure. But a UC education at the in-state price is a great value, and a great option if spending 2.5x as much for Yale doesn’t add up for your family.
As for the economic-outcomes argument… do you want to work in the financial industry? Tons of Yale grads do, and it’s very lucrative. (This essay is over a decade old now, but still worth a look Even artichokes have doubts - Yale Daily News ) If that’s the path you see for yourself, then the added investment in Yale might pay off (financially, I mean). But… 1) Look at the financial comparison in terms of opportunity cost as well. That addition money not spent on Yale could be invested, and won’t incur the costs of carrying debt. You would have to do a lot better income-wise to pass the break-even point any time soon after graduation. And 2) Do you actually want the highest-paying possible career path? If it’s possible that you might want to choose something rewarding that wouldn’t be the highest-paying option… will you feel that you can still make that choice after paying for Yale?
You might change your mind about law school. The investment bankers I know all seem happier than the lawyers I know. The hardest part of banking is the first few years as an analyst.
You might get a job at Bain or Google or Tesla and find your life’s work without needing law school.
Or work for four years in banking and then apply to law school. You’ll be a better candidate and have money to go back to school. Or you can get a MBA and move into any field you want.
This isn’t one right path, and Yale gives you a lot of options.
Nope! Some are, of course. But there just aren’t all that many Yale students and there are tens of thousands ucla students. So actually, I think your competition is much stiffer at ucla.
You say you want to go to law school. That is THE profession that values elite schools!! Even undergrad.
As for your parents paying for law school. Hold on now. That is something you can pay for. Seriously. But cross that bridge when you come to that.
Thank you!
This reply gives me some hope. I’m hoping it’d all work out in the end. Currently, it seems like the most likely place I’ll be attending is Yale.
Thank you for the insight, but I thought law schools didn’t care about undergraduate?..
Anyways, I’m also hoping to pay for law school myself – but my parents really want me to get everything done in the next 6-7 years and come out as a big-shot lawyer.
Magical dream, yes, but if it helps alleviate their anxieties…
It seems a little like you don’t want the pressure Yale will put on you (in the form of pressure you are putting on yourself due to your perception of your parents’ expectations).
It might help to talk things out with them. Tell them you are anxious that you’ll let them down after they have spent all this money on you. It might be a burden off your shoulders to share these feelings and you can talk together about how much that burden is costing —it may not be nearly as bad as you think, financially, for them.
I say, excellent. Now, work hard and make your parents proud!
(But don’t go off the deep end. You put a lot of pressure on yourself)
Local scholarships approx $5k one time for frosh year.
Part time jobs at Yale, enough for pocket money.
Froco, room and board $19k off
Summer internships (consulting 1 year, IB 1 year) about $2k/week.
Current job IB 1st year (annualized > $150k)