<p>So I'm supposed to make a decision today, but am completely unprepared to. I'm debating between two programs, one having more prestige, while the other is offering more money.</p>
<p>I have no idea which one I want (they both have lots of positives and negatives) so am considering just accepting both and giving myself more time to make the right decision. I know it's unethical, and I feel bad for doing it, but this decision is really important to me and I want to get it right. The big question is: will I get caught?</p>
<p>I’m just trying to delay making a decision. Right now I’m not prepared to pick one and need more time to make a choice. Obviously when I make a choice I’ll just tell one of the schools that I’m not coming. Will I get busted and have my admission to both revoked?</p>
<p>Well if the schools are part of the graduate council and I think for the most part the majority are, if you accept and change your mind after April 15, you have to get a written release from the school before you can accept another one so yes I don’t think it’s as easy as you think to “game” the system.</p>
<p>This is a bad idea. If you reject after 4/15 you make it very difficult for them to find a quality replacement for your spot, and that makes it all the more likely that they will scream bloody murder about you to anyone who will listen.</p>
<p>Do you really think you are going to get any more information a week from now? A month? You have all the information you are going to get until you actually start the program, so you just need to sack up and make a decision.</p>
<p>Learn to make snap decisions. Life is also about making snap decisions when you’re short on time.</p>
<p>Just make a decision. You’ll make someone on the waitlist very happy today, Please give them a good start to the weekend instead of torturing them to wait until Monday to find out where they’re going to be.</p>
<p>You know choosing both would be unethical, yet you are still debating it because you want to make it easier for you to make a choice? I think you need to take pause and think about that right there. If you realize something is unethical, you really need to just stop right there and not do it. </p>
<p>Also, if that isn’t enough: if you accept both and the schools catch wind, I bet you would be rejected from BOTH right off the spot for unethical behavior. Furthermore, it is quite possible that you would be VERY happy at both and that is why you are having trouble making up your mind. It is unlikely you will suddenly come to the realization that there is one obvious and perfect choice.</p>
<p>My opinion: AVOID DEBT AT ALL COSTS. If more money = another $1K added to your stipend, then go with more prestige, but if more money is the difference between living comfortably and taking out loans, go with the one offering more money!</p>
<p>Making an ethical decision is a component of getting it right. See also, Bernie Madoff and legions of others. Suck it up. You are, at least putatively, an adult now.</p>
<p>Fwiw, neither “prestige” nor “giving more money” would be definitive for me, both leading to equally short-sighted decisions. </p>
<p>Have you thought about which one is best for your professional development, which will lead you to consider multiple factors in aggregate?</p>
<p>It would’ve been helpful if you had given more concrete ideas about the decision you are trying to make. In any case, I’d imagine you’ve made the decision already, but if you’re talking about in-field research prestige and you plan on staying in academia or at least within your research field, I’d go for the prestige unless the difference is substantial enough that you’d be uncomfortable or have to go into debt. 5 years is 5 years; you can make do on a bit less for a while to make it better for the rest of your professional life (which, assuming you finish in your early 30s, can be another 30-40 years long).</p>
