ADD and Dorming vs. Commuting

<p>Hi everyone,</p>

<p>I'm a college freshman with ADD, and I just spent the past seven months in a dorm suite. Things didn't go so well. At least 3-5 times each week, I'd lose my College ID, key, wallet and/or phone, and over the course of the year, I've had to buy a new college ID on six different occasions. I'm not made of money, so all of my replacement items are really starting to add up. It's really stressful losing things, in particular my room key. I feel awful making my roommates or the RA unlock my door (there is a $20 fine each time the RA unlocks the door), so oftentimes, I just sleep in a public place on campus to avoid this issue, even though it's probably not particularly comfortable or safe. I feel positively ashamed of myself in my dorm building. A lot of people think I'm a drunk (not true), because obviously the only reason a person could be this forgetful is because she is always out partying. My room is a wreck, but everytime I try to organize it, I forget where I put {insert important item here}, meaning I have to tear it apart again. I feel awful that my roommates have to put up with me. I'm considering commuting next year, because I haven't found any value to living on campus. I can't concentrate in my dorm because it's too noisy, and I only have two friends at my college (and they live on the opposite end of campus). I feel lonely much of the time, because there is no one around to talk to. </p>

<p>I think commuting would alleviate most of my problems (emphasis on /think/). The stuff I lose becomes misplaced from frequent ly taking it out of my purse; while I will have to deal with car keys, I will only have to take this out of my purse twice a day, whereas with a room key, I have to rip this out 5-7 times over the course of the day. My family is understanding of my forgetfulness, and they hide a house key in our yard. It's easier for me to be organized at home because I don't have to squeeze all of my stuff into a four by ten foot space. I have long-established storage spaces at home, so it's much easier for me to remember where I put things. Though the commute would chew up a good two hours (which I could spend reading, as I will be on public transportation most of the time), my disorganization on campus has cost me a lot of lost time, which probably rivals this amount. (e.g. running back and forth from the library to my dorm because I keep forgetting study items, standing in line at the RA's office to get unlocked, etc.) I think I would be happier living at home, because I greatly miss my pets. My family is very dysfunctional, so I guess I do have to pick my poison--either loneliness/stress in the dorm, or arguments/stress at home. </p>

<p>My parents, however, want me to live on campus. They think that I will enjoy the "on campus experience" this time around. They suggest that I apply for a disability-single in an on-campus apartment. While I think, socially, this arrangement could be better (my friends would be in the same building, though we couldn't live together because we're different graduation years), I am still worried the lost item/disorganization issue will persist. What do you think? Am I overlooking the pitfalls of commuting, or do you think that commuting could be a more positive experience for me?</p>

<p>Wonder if you can find an organized friend or sibling to be your roommate, on or off campus? Are you taking medication regularly? Sometimes it helps to have a bit more structure.</p>

<p>Have you considered putting everything on a lanyard? I know they aren’t a great fashion accessory, but you could put it under your shirt or loop it around a beltloop and keep in a pocket. That may help with that issue. Alternately, loop that lanyard around the purse handle and you can pull it out to use it but it is always tethered to your purse!!!</p>

<p>You might feel more comfortable at home, but learning strategies to solve these problems will be lifelong skills that you will need.</p>

<p>Does your school have an Disability Office that can address your concerns?
Sounds you need to live on campus but need help.</p>

<p>You don’t have the ability to organize and maintain your life and school and it is getting expensive and unsafe.</p>

<p>You need multiple retractable cord gizmos all attached to your backpack.
Room key, whip it out to unlock the door and retractable cord automatically zipcords it back to the backpack.
Card ID, whip it out to scan, then it will retract back to your backpack.
Mini wallet, whip it out to get money and then retract it back to its pocket.
Phone, you use and replace it back to its special pocket every time, no laying it around.
Routine, routine until it is second nature.</p>