Re: attending accepted student days for all schools extending offers. I can see an argument for going to all or many. But we made a very different decision. And many people will disagree with our decision but it worked well for us. My STEM son went to exactly one campus preview weekend. Had he hated it, he’d have gone to others. But he only went to the university he ended up attending.
Many students are fortunate to get offers from many great schools. And it is flattering to be invited to the campus for a preview. But there are some downsides. For us, it made sense to consider this on the front end. My STEM son had a certain school on his radar from 7th grade onward. I pretty much knew that if he got in, he’d end up there. For his intended major, there was really only one rival, and it was off the table due to distance (2800 miles). Because his record was very unusual, the prediction calculators were worthless. So he applied to a slew and got in to most. yet his resolve to attend the original one never wavered. It wouldn’t have been my choice but it was, for him, the best choice.
While I knew little about the school at the time, the one thing I did know was that it lacked the creature comforts some schools prioritize-those features designed expressly to appeal to 18 year olds from wealthy backgrounds used to certain luxuries and who’d be wowed by climbing walls, “lazy rivers”, fine dining, posh living quarters, etc. The school this kid wanted had none of that. Students wouldn’t “well up with pride” when asked about their dorms and he’d not find “mouth watering food, bowling, billards and more” at camp…I mean campus. (not an aside, but all those wonderful camp like accoutrements represent the administration’s priorities-money spent to attract students wanting a posh living situation is taken from…).
In the end, I knew he’d not prioritize the climbing wall and posh dorms over outstanding academics. Yet, if he spent much time on those campuses he might be left with the impression that every other school on the planet had creature comforts lacking at his school. Not true of course. But what good would have been gained by seeing "posh’ when he’d end up at a university? Had he been conflicted, he’d have gone to another school he viewed as close. But visiting loads of schools would have added noise that could have derailed his decision making. Naturally he wanted to make sure that he felt a good fit with whatever school he attended. But, he was not going to base his decision on a vibe he gets during an overnight stay. He had made his decision based on important differences across schools-things that may not be as salient during a night’s stay but that make a difference in the long term. If it were a decision about attending camp, that overnight vibe would be telling. But for a decision about college, the most important factors may not be discernable during an over night visit. Instead, superficial differences may take on too much meaning.