Advice for roomate selection

<p>So here we are....first child/daughter off to Elon this fall. As the time approaches to give preference to housing and roommate selection, please give any thoughts or ideas on how to guide a child on this matter. Certainly she has used the facebook page and other social media to make some informal contact. How would parents who have experienced this right of passage guide another child on this process? To some extent, I am sure this appears to be a bigger deal than it actually is ~ but not right at this moment so says the daughter. In some respects, I almost think that rolling the dice by filling out the housing questionnaire diffuses the pressure of picking or matching yourself to the ideal roommate. Any help is sincerely appreciated. </p>

<p>Tough question to answer. We’ve had all sorts of experience in this department. My D requested a roommate that was a friend and it didn’t go so well. My S requested someone he met on that roommate website and didn’t get him. My D is with a friend again and it’s going fantastic. Bottom line, there is no right answer. I do know kids who have switched rooms or roommates early on. If it isn’t the right fit, it can be fixed, not to worry.</p>

<p>My S joined a learning community and that set him up with kids that were more his type. Really worked out well for him.</p>

<p>My daughter connected with some students on the facebook page. She found her roommate there and it has been wonderful. They did talk about some of the big things before they decided to room together – established that they wouldn’t kick each other out to have boys spend the night, that they had similar sleeping hours, that they both liked to be social and wanted the door open a lot, like to go to parties but weren’t heavy drinkers. They have both had to make compromises and concessions, but it has worked out really well for them. They are not in the same activities and therefore have different friend groups (though there hall is very close and socializes together a lot), which is a good thing. They love coming home and telling each other about their day. They are planning to live together all 4 years because it has worked out so well. </p>

<p>My advice there is to decide what’s important on the front end and communicate before making the decision: moral codes (this is important – that seems to get between roommates a lot), whether you want your room to be the social center for the hall or a quiet retreat, when you want to go to bed etc. Don’t look for a best friend, but someone you are compatible with.</p>

<p>That all being said, my daughter tells me it’s a crapshoot. Some random roomies work out wonderfully and some who choose each other explode. Probably the most important thing is flexibilty and communication once they are actually living together. And, like Frogshollow said – if it doesn’t work they can swtich at semester. My daugther knows some people who did that and who are very happy now.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>My son did the learning community last year and that random pairing worked well. But agree that communication is absolutely the key - along with being considerate and flexible.</p>

<p>Regarding the learning communities, do they take up a lot of time? I know that a bunch of them do a lot of activities and I dont want to limit my potential involvement with other activities by signing up for an LC.</p>

<p>I think it varies by LC and varies further from year to year depending on the faculty advisor. I have heard more comments about how little some LCs do than complaints about too many activities. </p>

<p>There seems to be many students finding their roommates online ( Facebook). Does Elon match those students who don’t find a roommate on their own?</p>

<p>@1stkidtocollege If you don’t list a preferred roommate on the form you will fill out a survey that they will use to match you. It may seem like a lot of people are finding their roommates but many more aren’t and will be using the survey.</p>

<p>Please honestly do a random roommate. I have three friends and myself who found roommates via facebook and it turned out horribly for all of us. If you need to move, Elon does not make it easy.</p>

<p>Choosing roommates via Facebook is probably not the best idea. You only know the version of the person that they present publicly on FB. And honestly, what will make for compatible roommates isn’t what type of clothes you wear or what music you listen to. It’s living with someone who will respect you and your property, and being the type of person who can compromise. </p>

<p>My D was accepted ED in December and joined her class’s FB group. A sub-group of kids from our area then split off from the Class’s FB group and created their own FB group to plan a local get-together in the spring of their senior year of HS. When the 20 or so incoming freshmen from their local FB group actually got together for an afternoon in late April, she and another girl really hit it off and, after talking online for a week or so, they decided to room together. It was a good decision and they had a fun, peaceful freshman year. They ended up in different friend groups after freshman year but remain friendly. Meeting IN PERSON, backed up by checking each other’s FB profiles, really made the difference. </p>