<p>(This may be tl;dr... but please do read it. And any advice is seriously appreciated. This is very important to me... even if it might seem silly to others.)</p>
<p>The entirety of my senior year I was unbelievable ecstatic to be going away for college. And to NYC, no less, the city of my dreams. But then the end of the school year came; along with it the spring play, my boyfriend, and unfortunately... love. Now, I know you're thinking "Unfortunately?" Ok, yeah... definitely not unfortunate. FAR from it. But it does put a snag in my complete and utter happiness at going away. Because, you see, my boyfriend is still only a senior. And while he plans to attend college in NYC (as fate would have it), there's still a year before he goes up, so... While I'm still quite excited to leave, I'm also quite sad. Devastated really. I know I sound quite dramatic. I would have called myself a fool a few months ago. I had a firm disbelief in the success high school romances (though...this hardly qualifies as one, since it began in my final chapters of my high school career). At least a firm disbelief teenage relationships being serious and lasting. Heh, well my mind has been changed on that matter... slightly...</p>
<p>OK, I'm rambling... The point is this: My boyfriend and I want to continue our relationship long distance over the next year. Visits in person will be rare, especially with a college student's (lack of) salary. They'll be limited to whenever he comes up to audition, thanksgiving, christmas, spring break, and <em>maybe</em> a couple of plane-ticket-presents from family members who love me dearly ;) :p</p>
<p>I don't expect it to be easy. I expect it to be extremely difficult. And I expect it will be even more difficult than I expect (you know...once the distance is actually between us). But I want to give it a go.</p>
<p>Anyone else in a similar situation? Anyone have any advice on how to stay connected even through the distance?</p>
<p>Thank you all.</p>
<p>EDIT:* I understand why people would advise against LDRs...but please understand the commitment to a LDR is already in place... I would like some advice on how to handle it, how to go about it... How to actually have a long distance relationship... Thank you.*</p>
<p>The advice: Don't have them. Break it off.</p>
<p>Buy a webcam, talk on the phone, and write letters.</p>
<p>Basically, don't allow him or yourself to forget about each other.</p>
<p>Well I'm leaving my girl when I go to college. Not because I don't care for her, it would just be too tough to have a long distance relationship, and it would be unfair for the both of us. We're still going to be friends though, just in case something may happen in the future between us :)</p>
<p>My advice - break it off.</p>
<p>What makes me raise an eyebrow is the fact that you're doing this after only having dated him for a few months. If you two had been dating for a few years and wanted to keep it up until he gets to college (which isn't guaranteed- you may want to think about what would happen to your relationship if he wasn't able to go to college in NYC), I would understand a little better. It just seems strange that you want to make this huge commitment to him already.</p>
<p>If I were you, I would think long and hard about why you want to do this instead of starting off fresh at college. If you do decide it's what you really want, then just make sure you keep in touch as much as possible, and don't do anything that would cause him to lose his trust in you.</p>
<p>It just seems strange that you want to make this huge commitment to him already.</p>
<p>I don't think it's that strange. My boyfriend was a freshman and I was a senior when we started dating, and two months in we knew we wanted to get married and that that was the goal we were working towards. Two and a half years down the road and there's been no change in that plan.</p>
<p>Anyway, I may be in a similar position as you in a year or two depending on about a bajillion factors that I won't go into. As I haven't been in a LDR yet I can't give any advice from experience, but I've watched a few and seen what works and what doesn't.</p>
<p>Mainly I would just say to exert the effort. If neither of you is even willing to put forth the effort it will take you're screwed from the start. Call, email, use a webcam, whatever. Even snail mail! Everyone loves getting letters. :) Talk about everything, even trivial stuff like what you had for breakfast. Let him know what's going on in your life. And just keep in mind where you want this relationship to go and why you're in it. I know people who have been whole continents apart for years and are now married, so it's definitely doable. Again, putting forth the effort is the most important part. It won't be easy, but it's totally doable.</p>
<p>I was in a long-distance relationship for this past school year when my high school girlfriend left for college (we had been dating for ~8 or 9 months), and coming this fall the distance will become even longer as I'm going to another college. I honestly didn't have too much of a problem with it, but this really depends on how you two communicate and what really inspires the relationship. Also, my girlfriend does mind it more than I do.</p>
<p>We talked everyday on the phone, and it will really depend on you two individually if that's enough. I'm dating my girlfriend because I love to talk to her, and I'm quite the optimist, so I don't find the physical disconnect that grueling at all, really: I'm just thankful that I have the technology to keep the communication with us at the level that it was when she was here. It was definitely sad when she left, but over the long-term I found it more than bearable. Physical relationships would obviously suffer more, but I don't see that being as a foundation of a long-term relationship to begin with.</p>
<p>It's quite difficult for a lot of people, but it is doable: though it's (very) rare, I've heard of people who were in long-distance relationships for a few years who ended up married. Don't quite count on that, but my advice is it's a good idea to try it out first to see if you two are up for it before breaking it off.</p>