Advice

<p>Does any of you know what's the total size of the class of 2010?</p>

<p>Thank you lizzardfire -- I do like feeling encouraged! And Joe, thanks for your qualification (and for meeting me earlier this summer -- though I was intimidated). But, back to Ben's remarks.... Now, he may not have specifically written "all consuming," but when I read that I should be prepared to give up "important things in my life" (ummmm, like a social life, the beach, art galleries?), "a lot of immediate pleasure" (ummmm, lizzardfire?), and to prepare to enjoy "pain" (although, that I think I can deal with), then I defiinitely inferred something approaching "all-consuming..." whatever. There must something, though, that's making me continue to stalk this site. Guess I'll have to visit again.<br>
Oh, do you think the idea of being part of a 28/29% minority is a good enough reason to apply?
Humor aside, I do love science/math; I was decidedly energized after a visit to MIT (including classes) earlier this year; and I enjoy challenges. It's just that I have a problem doing any one thing to the exclusion of other activities I enjoy (and there are many of those). Keep me posted -- I'm really equivocating about EA now.</p>

<p>Yay!</p>

<p>I certainly didn't mean you have to give up most of your other activities (though it could plausibly be read that way, for which I apologize). I read for pleasure at Caltech more than I did in high school, just to take one example; Joe did 11 million extracurricular things, etc. By "important things in your life" I meant "always feeling like you're great at the things you do academically" -- like you almost certainly did in high school; "being comfortable with your level of knowledge and cleverness" -- which you will sometimes have to give up, etc.</p>

<p>The main cost of Caltech psychologically, I think, is giving up a great deal of comfort to be stretched and made stronger. It doesn't mean some kind of monastic existence unless you want it to be.</p>

<p>I will post the next bit of advice now, though I continue to welcome comments/sharp objects regarding previous bits.</p>

<ol>
<li>Care. Almost nobody who doesn't care about what they are doing succeeds at Caltech. (Sweeping generalization: … or in life.) If you want to be happy, you have to find somewhere – anywhere – the motivation to keep you going.</li>
</ol>

<p>Doing well and being happy are much easier if you are passionate about the things you spend most of your time on than if you are not. If you are driven by the idea of learning enough math to breeze through grad school in three years and proving big theorems in your early twenties, you will gladly put in more hours than you ever would just for a grade or if you were being paid by the hour (even $100 an hour). If you want to build the next Google, you will devote yourself to debugging your programs in a way you never could if you just cared about getting into a good grad school.</p>

<p>Casual observation suggests that passion is much more important than innate ability past a certain cutoff (roughly the cutoff for getting into Caltech). Less smart people often do vastly more for themselves and for the world than smarter people, just by dint of being more motivated to succeed. </p>

<p>So be motivated about what you do and figure out how to do what motivates you. Keep asking yourself what's in it for you – what about this field of study deserves your devotion? If the answer comes out to be "nothing" and stays that way for more than a month, worry. (Do not worry, however, if your motivation flags for a day or a week. That is guaranteed to happen and is normal.) Ask yourself what you do care about and see if it's possible to focus on that, instead – even if that means leaving Caltech. Ask yourself whether taking a term or two off would help you refocus and find yourself again. Consider whether some counseling might help you get rid of issues in your life that prevent you from being motivated.</p>

<p>Lives lived without passion are often tragic. It matters little how impressive your work is if you do not like doing it. It is better to do something mundane or undistinguished with joy and zeal than to do something sublime and incredible in a state of misery or boredom.</p>

<p>The worst thing that can happen to you is not caring that you've lost your passion, and just going through the motions anyway. Make yourself a promise that you will be honest with yourself about whether you still love what you are doing, and that you will deal with it if the answer is "no".</p>

<p>I think, from what I'm reading, that Ben is a little more hardcore about Caltech than I was. I'm not saying that in a negative way. Heck, Ben quite probably gets more than I did out of Caltech, especially on the academic side. I just sort of felt like I was doing what I needed to get done and if I took a particular interest in something (science or not), I'd do more of that. I never felt like I was shut off from anything or giving anything up "for science." I was busy but I don't think it was a monastic existence at all. In particular, if you actually start homework early instead of the night before, you'll have time to finish your work AND goof off, without the work hanging over your head. I didn't learn this, or it didn't sink in, until after my freshman year, but it's 100% the truth.</p>

<p>What some people at Caltech do is NOT, in fact, work all the time, but spend all week whining and getting stressed... and then cap it off by starting the set the night before and having to rush through. This is not a recipe for happiness, because even the time you weren't actually working wasn't relaxing or fun. Better to spend an hour or so each day on each set and live a more balanced life. Easier said than done, but definitely possible.</p>

<p>justanothermom, I remember hearing that the total class size for the class of 2010 is 195. I'm sure someone will correct me if I'm wrong..and my son received a class directory in the mail today. I would count..but there seemed to be lots of duplicates.</p>

<p>I got 216 when I counted the list in the back of the directory, which didn't seem to have the duplicates from the alphabetical listing. </p>

<p>-Oren</p>

<p>We were allowed to opt out of the directory, so if you counted 216 we are probably > 216. (I counted myself and also got 216).</p>

<p>Edit, by the way, I find it kind of funny, but Harold Ilana Malz is actually Aliza Ilana Malz. They got it correct in the back, but not in the front. Tee hee, poor Aliza/Harold.</p>

<p>Oh goodness, I just realized I'd better be careful what I say on here..since you frosh all have my son's email address! :)</p>

<p>Yes... only one person from oakland (and now I know who it is! blahaha)</p>

<p>(of course, we also have addresses and phone numbers! <em>ring ring</em> "Is this oaklandmom?" lol jk don't do that anyone)</p>

<p>lol interesting how you linked me with immediate pleasure, magd.</p>

<p>Thanks for the responses. No directory here yet, and I was curious. </p>

<p>Oaklandmom, I think I will have to be careful, too and keep a low profile. :)</p>

<p>Well. lizzardfire, we haven't met, but I'm always the optimist...!</p>

<p>Aw heck, I'd want to have a high profile on the Caltech forum if my kid got in. Congratulations to the '10 'rents.</p>

<p>I would be so very mortified if my parents were posting on this site. Really, do your sons/daughters know what you're doing late at night on those computers? (tsk, tsk.) Clearly, some disciplining is in order.</p>

<p>I wouldn't mind my mother posting on these forums except for the fact that I post somewhat often here and I would rather not have to censor my posts to make them "mother-approved".</p>

<p>O.K. Well, that was more or less my reasoning (apart from the fact that I think parents should be doing other stuff).
Anyhow, this thread has been sorta sabotaged -- we need to get back to more Golub advice. Oh, and I need to get back to my summer reading and perhaps some college app. essays (sigh).</p>

<p>Ben has been teasing me about tomorrow's posts. He says he will not tell me what they are, but that I will take a special interest in them once they are posted. Darn you, Master Golub, Darn you!</p>

<p>magd, don't worry, my son's is dishing out the discipline, he throws a pillow at me when I report something that's been posted on cc or that I've posted. Maybe there's a reason that when he received the invite to the BBQ for northern CA prefrosh he didn't tell me parents were invited...</p>

<p>tokenadult, thanks! I haven't stopped smiling since December when his acceptance letters arrived! (though I'm expecting more than a few tears to fall when I drop him off Sept 17 in Pasadena).</p>

<p>They open the store on 17th, so parents can buy mugs, license plates, clothes, with the logo. Personally, I've seen the bright orange umbrella and like it, but never make it to store when its open. I did buy a few Einstein posters, which later framed and now hang proudly in my office.
Magd-- S knows I've been posting, & his friends know who I am. I don't embarrass him. I've never read any posts from Oaklandmom that would embarrass her S. General Qs benefit everyone.
By the way, my S at caltech never wanted a TV, but everyone else's kid wants TV, along with frig and microwave. Should S want to watch a movie or TV, he'd watch in lounge or on monitor.</p>