<p>I moved in couple days ago, but I haven't really been able to find the group of people that I would like be close friends with yet although its welcome week. btw, I am a relatively an average guy, social wise.
Anyways, I am looking forward to joining clubs/classes/orchestra to meet people, because I think I'll meet some great people through activities that I like to do. I was wondering if some people experienced the same thing in college ? Like, didn't make much friends through welcome week, but mostly through activities/clubs and remained very close friends for the college years ?</p>
<p>yea ur alone, no one has trouble adjusting to new environments.</p>
<p>k thanks man, good to hear that. That means I am truely unique from rest of you guys. At least, I didn't cry in class about my food being spoiled like you</p>
<p>I had an awful freshman hall. everyone acted like they were freshmen in hs. I actually met alot of people through classes. And I later rushed, which also helped. I did luck out though, and became really good friends with a guy on my brother hall. Yay for best friends!</p>
<p>dababwo, you will be fine, what you may see as sudden life long friendships are just people getting tp know each other with no expectations
so relax, talk to people and ask questions </p>
<p>it will fall into place</p>
<p>Eh you are not alone. I've been here awhile but i still haven't anybody who i probably would be good friends with... I hang out with ppl in my hall sometimes but.. eh.</p>
<p>Same here! Oh my gosh! Don't worry, I'm beginning to think we're all on the same boat. I look around and EVERYONE has like this solid group and I'm thinking "WHY was I not present when THAT happened?" But in the end, I think there are others like us, who don't bind to people right away but wait for the right group of friends to bond with.</p>
<p>anonymous is obviously being sarcastic dababwi. pretty much everyone is in the same boat as u starting out, whether they admit it or not.</p>
<p>, I'm beginning to think we're all on the same boat. I look around and EVERYONE has like this solid group and I'm thinking "WHY was I not present when THAT happened?"</p>
<p>^ EXACTLY.. OMG</p>
<p>I haven't even moved in yet :(</p>
<p>Just a few more days, though.</p>
<p>Luckily, I'm at a college where it's easy to make friends. However, I did have to have the initiative to approach people. Like many of the posters said, the freshmen are all on the same boat, so they'd probably appreciate it if you start conversations with them. Do this RIGHT AWAY (meaning in the first few days, starting on the very hour you get to campus) to maximize your opportunities. But of course, you will have other chances once clubs start meeting. Also, you have to go out of your comfort zone... for instance, I decided one day to play ping pong (that's not something I would normally do) and the person I played against ended up being one of my good friends. During meals, encourage your group to sit down at table full of strangers (or if you're alone, do so on your own... it's scary but exhilarating). Attend club meetings, even if doing so would require a shift in your schedule. Form study groups with people in your classes who live in your residence hall. Invite people to places.
In other words, it takes some work to establish a core group of friends; its members will likely come from many different groups, even from groups you normally wouldn't associate with. However, don't be clique-y. Always approach new people. I'm a future sociologist/anthropologist, so I'm constantly observing people in different settings. This mindset has helped ease any anxiety that would otherwise prevent me from immersing myself in different environments. I'm actually studying a specific group of people right now (with the help of a professor).</p>
<p>It is very possible you don't make exceptionally close friends during welcome week. My dad met one of his best friend three months before graduation.</p>
<p>*specific group of people on campus</p>
<p>Is it weird to not even have anyone to hang out with during the first few days? Because I don't have anyone I can go eat with, even from my hall. It makes me sad.</p>
<p>Don't worry too much about it. It's been exactly a week, and it's still hard to tell who I'm going to be close friends with. I know I'm friends with almost everyone on the floor (except the two guys that nobody likes and the two guys that never leave their room), but I don't know which friendships are going to deepen. I know I'll end up being close friends with some of them, I just don't know who. They're all great people, so I know I'm going to love being friends with them--hell, we threw an impromptu dance party in our floor lounge last night till like 3 am, using our iPods and someone's deck. It was a blast, especially when all the drunk people came in.</p>
<p>It is normal not to know people the first several weeks in college. The people who are hanging out together either may have known each other in h.s. or may be just hanging out together for comfort. Just because they're hanging out now doesn't mean that they are close friends or ever will be close friends. Unless they knew each other before college, they probably barely know each other and may have little in common except for all being freshmen.</p>
<p>Where students usually get to know each other is through clubs. That's how they find people with things in common wtih them. Consequently, go to the meetings of any clubs that you have even a faint interest in. You don't have to be an expert in whatever the club's about. Freshmen aren't expected to be experts, so now is the time to dive into things.</p>
<p>Another way of meeting people is through service activities. Often colleges will have community service projects. By doing things with other students, yo get to know them and can become friends.</p>
<p>It's also a good idea to look for people sitting alone in the caf, and ask if you can join them. They probably are shy and would welcome company. Be willing to start the conversational ball rolling by saying your name, where you're from, and that you're a freshman. You might want to also say what courses you're taking, and ask the person about themselves, too. If they don't respond by saying very much, assume they are shy. Don't assume that you did something wrong. </p>
<p>It also can help you meet people if you wear something like a T-shirt that tells something about you -- like a T-shirt with a picture of your pet dog, or a T-shirt from your high school. That can open the door to people starting conversations with you.
You probably also can get advice by posting a thread asking how to meet people in college.</p>
<p>To the OP- your post asks the same question my son (a freshman at Wake) asked in another post-he feels the exact same way! Listen to all the advice and you will be fine! Best of luck!</p>
<p>I have met several people in college so far and exchanged phone numbers, but I feel lonely and somewhat sad because we don't ever talk to each other though we could. I called some of them and talked to them, but they don't call me and I rarely see them. Is this the norm? Should I continue to call them although I don't want to be a pest? I know friendships take time to form. Any perspectives or wise words??</p>
<p>Don't just call them to chat: Invite them to go work out at the rec center or go bowling or see a movie or explore the town.</p>
<p>It can be hard talking to someone on the phone whom one has just met. This particularly is true for shy people. Doing activities together, however, can help you find things in common to talk about.</p>
<p>Also, a good way to meet people is to sit in your room with your door open. Have cookies or something yummy to offer when people walk by and stick their heads in. Your room can become the floor hangout, and you'll meet lots of folks. Remember, most incoming students are like you: They don't know many people and don't know how to meet people.</p>
<p>I think your feelings are normal, it is just that you are admitting them! I think every freshman feels lonely at times, it is hard when everyone is working out their schedule and finding their way in a new place. Just keep reaching out and get involved in clubs, you will meet people and it will all click into place. In the meanwhile, know that everyone is feeling the same way at one time or another. If not, they came there with alot of classmates from highschool,and by only hanging out with that group they will be missing out on meeting new people and a certain amount of growth. My son called home and told us about the same feelings you are having after only one week, and once he told us and we comforted him, everything got better. He just called from a football game with "3 friends"! Two weeks ago, he was worried. Call home and talk to someone you love and trust, they will reassure you that you will make friends and great times are ahead. Good luck to you!</p>