<p>So I'm taking a graduate class on global economics, this is a highly discussion based class. The professor has, over the course of 4 class meetings, made at least 2-3 "fat" jokes per class session. Essentially the jokes are pegging "fat" people as imagery for the over consumption of the west. As someone who has, still does, and will likely always, struggle with weight this has made me uncomfortable in the discussion portion class. I am normally quiet but still participate/contribute but when this guy calls on me I literally cannot form a coherent thought. Part of me feels like this is my own insecurities, but, at the same time, I do feel his incessant jokes are inappropriate. </p>
<p>So I'm just curious, do other people find this sort of behavior from professors inappropriate and if so, what would you do about it? </p>
<p>Also, just to be clear, the professor hasn't said anything about me or to me personally or about any other individual. I've also received excellent grades and feedback on my written work from him. I'm talking purely about how his jokes make me uncomfortable in a discussion environment and that I'm unsure how to handle this, if it's just me, etc.</p>
<p>Just tell your prof that you feel offended about his fat jokes. Otherwise it’ll continue until you bring attention to it.</p>
<p>Sent from my HTC HD2 using CC App</p>
<p>Yeah, talk to the professor. He might not know he’s causing issues for you.</p>
<p>I think you are being too sensitive. What if one of your customers made a comment when you are out in the workplace; would you narc them out? You need to concentrate on the content, not on the words. People will make stupid, insensitive remarks all the time and you need to learn to let them slide off. Life out in the workplace is not nearly as gentle and protected as life in school.</p>
<p>I’ll join the “you’re being too sensitive camp.” Unless he’s directing personal insults at you personally, I see no problem. “Fat” is a fairly common metaphor for over-consumption. To me, the issue seems more of how you deal with your own self-image issues, rather than the professor being insensitive.</p>
<p>I agree. I understand your insecurity issues but I don’t think he means it as an insult. You should probably try to adapt. It will make you stronger!</p>
<p>This isn’t to address your question, but to raise my own: what would you think of an alcoholic who said he “will probably always struggle with alcohol”? Wouldn’t you think he has resigned himself to ill health and addiction? So why are you resigning yourself to struggling with weight? Unless you are one of those very rare people who has a specific, biological, medical problem causing weight gain, then you are not doomed to struggle with weight your whole life. You can take control of your eating and exercise habits <em>today</em> and make a new future.</p>
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<p>Knowing many alcoholics myself, I would probably be pretty understanding. You never really get over a substance abuse problem. The temptation is always there, and there is always potential for relapse. I had a great uncle who was in an out of rehab pretty much his entire adult life, and he kicked all sorts of hard drugs, but always went back to drinking. There are a lot of factors that go into it. </p>
<p>Many people always struggle with weight, even when adapting generally good habits. Our society treats food with a lot of emotional baggage, so it can be easy to learn to use it as a coping mechanism, which can subsequently be difficult to unlearn. One of the difficult things with food-related issues is that you can’t give it up entirely like drugs or alcohol. No matter what, you still have to eat, and it can be challenging to moderate, especially when there are other factors going on in your life. </p>
<p>As for the OP’s issue, if it seems like the professor is a generally amicable person, it couldn’t hurt to approach him during office hours and just let him know that the comments make you uncomfortable. No judgment, no threats, just a statement, and if it changes or doesn’t change, I’d say that’s all that you should really do. I’m overweight myself and unfortunately in this world, you just have to learn to develop a thicker skin. Thankfully it hasn’t been much of a problem for me but I’m sure that I will encounter people eventually who will make comments and judgments, and it’s not right but it comes with the territory.</p>
<p>Yes, you are being too sensitive. In my opinion, this is one of the major issues with America today. Your weight (barring an extremely rare genetic disorder) is a personal decision. I understand it can be a very difficult problem to tackle, but ultimately it’s on you. This doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, dumb, inferior etc. etc., it means you’ve made a personal decision to have a higher than healthy BMI. You cannot expect everyone around you to make accommodations because your self-conscious about this decision you’ve made. If the Prof. was directly insulting you, it would be a different story. There’s a serious lack of personal responsibility in today’s youth (I’m a current college student). Rather than buck up and fix a problem, people would rather blame others and force them to “accommodate” them. If you want to be fat then by all means do it. If that’s what makes you happy then you have my blessing. However, don’t infringe upon other people’s actions because of this decision you’ve made.</p>
<p>You’re more than likely upset with this professor because you know your overweight and are insecure about it. Rather than face this fact you want to blame him. Either buck up and lose the weight or learn to be comfortable in your skin.</p>
<p>+1 for IgoranceIsBliss</p>
<p>Jeez get over it or lose weight then, if you don’t like people blabbing on about it. Like Bliss said, it’s a personal decision and not a “disability”, like so many people claim.</p>
<p>@ Ignoranceisbliss, James Madison, TomServo and ChadVene, awesome holier than thou approach to my problem but it appears as though you saw the word “fat” and didn’t read much the rest of the post. </p>
<p>I actually never abdicated responsibility for my weight, or even suggested it was not my responsibility. I pretty much just said I struggle with weight. The word “struggle” should imply that I am not complacent and suggests an active engagement. Apparently you all missed that. I also never said anything about “infringing” on the professors rights. I was asking if people found the jokes <em>inappropriate</em> not whether or not he had the right to make them. I never even suggested he “accommodate me.” I never said I had any plans to “narc” him out. I was actually explicit that he gave me great grades and very positive feedback on my written work. I actually like the guy. There are, however, a million apt metaphors for over consumption, think SUVs and his focus on one category of metaphor made me uncomfortable in the discussion portion of the class and I was looking for advice on how to handle that discomfort. </p>
<p>Thanks everyone else for the responses! I’m just going to ignore the jokes going forward.</p>
<p>I thought perhaps you were being a little oversensitive until I read some of the really hurtful remarks on here. I’m sorry that so many in our culture (myself included) rely on such superficial things as body shape to evaluate an individual’s worth. It’s well documented that heavier people are stereotyped negatively, are hired less often, and are paid less for the same work.</p>
<p>How about giving the prof the benefit of the doubt? He may indeed be unaware that his use of a widely used metaphor is causing hurt to anyone, and could very much appreciate your suggestion of alternate metaphors (I like the SUV one). One way to approach it might be to discuss how “people in this field” use the fat metaphor without realizing its pejorative impact, and let him draw the connection to his own behavior.</p>
<p>(And I don’t get the “narc them out” thing at all.)</p>
<p>@Janelle</p>
<p>How was I being holier than thou?</p>
<p>I applaud you for working on your weight problem. You should be happy that you’re on the right path and such jokes should only further motivate you to reach your goals. However, complaining about someone making a joke because of your personal insecurities is forcing other people to accommodate you. People are far to concerned with telling people what they can and cannot say today. I think many places in America (schools imp articular) are slowly infringing on people’s freedom of speech. We’re in a very scary place when an authority (school, government, business) can tell you not to say something because it hurts people’s feelings. That’s why this entire anti-bullying campaign scares me; It’s well intentioned, but could lead to very bad results. </p>
<p>I’m not encouraging people to say cruel things, I just maintain that they should have the right to. I’ve put a lot more than most on the line to ensure this freedom and don’t like seeing it slowly taken away.</p>
<p>@stradmom</p>
<p>You’re being extremely dramatic here. None of the posters said anything hurtful…unless you think the “truth” is hurtful. A person’s body weight is an important part of one’s health and appearance. Just as people are judged for wearing the wrong color shoes or having wrinkled shirts, people are judged for being overweight. It’s been proven over and over again that taller, attractive, smarter, better dressed etc. etc. people are paid more and considered to be of higher value. These connotations exist because they DO often have a loose correlation to reality…i.e. height makes people seem more “dominating”, attractiveness makes them more “personable”. Being overweight shows that a person is less healthy and less committed to maintaining appearances…this is probably more likely to translate to work than people think. These are of course broad generalizations and plenty of exceptions exist. I encourage you to actually consider what I’m saying rather than going into instant attack mode. </p>
<p>Things like height, intelligence etc. cannot be changed and are things we have to live with. Things like clothes and weight can be changed and people should make every effort to maintain standards if they want to be judged in the best light possible. If they don’t care and are happy to live as they do then that’s fine. Kids today are being met with the fat acceptance movement. I think this is wrong. Kids shouldn’t be taught that being overweight is good, they should be taught that being comfortable with yourself is good, and if you can do that while being overweight, more power to you.</p>