<p>So I'm not much of a party guy, but I'm not extremely boring or something. I'm supposed to be a pretty funny guy at school and I'm somewhat popular. But I went to my first party last week and it was just really lame. Everyone at my school's always going on and on about how parties are so awesome, but I didn't really see what was so great about it. It was basically just a bunch of drunk people running around, proclaiming their greatness for drinking more than other people. People were puking all over the place, using the bathroom in, well, everywhere but the bathroom. Random drunk girls stumbling into me and talking incoherently into my ear. Other people just pretending to be drunk. And unpopular kids trying desperately to drink as much as they can and getting as drunk as possible so they could finally be "cool". Maybe I'm just too critical of people, but if that's what parties are like, I just don't see the fun in them. I'm not like some kind of Puritan who never throws back a few. I guess it could have been the fact that I was driving, so I couldn't have too much. But even if I had I doubt the experience would have been much different. And what also bothered me was how much fun sober people were having taking facebook pictures of drunk people doing embarrassing things or goading drunk people into hooking up just so they could humiliate them the next day.</p>
<p>I just don't really know where I'm supposed to be in the high school spectrum because I'm tired of hanging out with kids who just talk about video games and grades all day, yet I do not want to hang out with these supposedly cool kids who get wasted every weekend. There doesn't seem to be much of an in between. I'm not a loner or anything. I have a group of people I eat lunch with and I occasionally hang out with other people I'm familiar with. But I just don't fit with anyone because I always end up hating their guts or thinking they're really immature or stupid. As arrogant as that sounds, I can't really help it. :/</p>
<p>You need to stop being so serious and start taking advantage of your surroundings, my friend.</p>
<p>I feel the same way you do bro. It’s either friends who care so much about school, or friends who don’t care almost at all and just drink or smoke a lot and keep you out or barely in it. There’s no happy medium…</p>
<p>OP im in the same exact situation, i have good grades (class rank 5) but i play varsity sports. I know everyone in the school, but i dont have any great friends because i dont wanna hang out with the nerds, or smoke pot and drink. Im really funny and at school i talk to everyone and most people like me, but outside of school i pretty much go home. I am a senior, so i am just hoping college will some more people like me, that i can actually be good friends with. But i guess this has all helped me keep my good grades up</p>
<p>Exact same situation. If you don’t like to see people drinking and stuff, then don’t go.</p>
<p>Perhaps you could just search for other friend groups. There are definitely people who are between those two spectrums; it’s just a matter of finding them.</p>
<p>Have you considered joining other clubs?</p>
<p>Maybe you could reach out to some other students in your classes that you don’t typically converse with as well.</p>
<p>This is more of a high school thing. I felt the same way sometimes back in hs. It changes in college. People do like to have fun and get wasted on a Friday night, but they also take their grades seriously and study hard on the weekdays. You just gotta find a good balance between both. For me it’s a work hard during the week, party hard on Friday/Saturday type thing. You do find those crazy drunks who party during the school week but they won’t be getting anywhere in life with that type of behavior.</p>
<p>^ is good advice. Join clubs and activities that you enjoy and naturally you will find people you like hanging out with. I know in high school there’s more peer pressure but it’ll go away soon. No one in college cares if you drink or not. Everyone just wants everyone to have a good time.</p>
<p>I know how you feel. I used to hang out the with the popular people, but they seemed all the same. Like talking about sex, drugs, getting wasted, and partying every week. Then I hanged out with the people who were more studious, but they only cared about grades, school, and anime. Luckily, I found an in between. And they are my close friends, since Junior year. Trust me they have normal people in your school just keep looking.</p>
<p>I was in this situation. At first, I tried the smart kids. Annoying. Then, I tried the ‘unique’ kids, aka the gothic/hipster/my hair is a rainbow people. Even more annoying. So I went to the popular kids, and they were soooo lame. Honestly, the popular kids were probably the worst, cause I was completely bored 100% of the time.</p>
<p>So, I went to the stoner crowd. The stoner crowd at my school might be different from most. They aren’t potential drop-outs like most schools, and some of them are actually pretty intelligent. Pretty much, these are the people I turn to when I feel like I’m becoming too much of a recluse. They’re the type of people that are up to anything and everything, as long as they can get a bowl in before we have to leave. If you want friends that pretty much will do whatever you’re into, (I’ve had these people go to bookstores with me, aquariums, movies, hiking, etc), and throw pretty alright parties, go see the stoners at your school. They aren’t clingy either (unless you’re a good connection), so you can pretty much use them for needed social interaction without having to worry about annoying text conversations. However, if dazzling conversation is a requirement, you won’t find it here (or anywhere in highschool, for that matter).</p>
<p>Oh, and I don’t mean the lame, wanna be popular stoners decked out in aeropostale. Look for the quiet ones in the back of class wearing ragged jeans.</p>
<p>lol You have no idea how well you described me right there.</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice, you guys. Good to see I’m not alone in this</p>
<p>Well, you need to understand that people go to parties for the sole reason of being able to feel that sense of recklessness - to be able to abandon all self-control and make mistakes and feel like there’s nothing to worry about. Just the idea of going to a big party is a high for a lot of people. Of course, there are people who will take it too far to the point where they’re drinking every night, but for the most part people are just looking for a temporary, exciting escape.</p>
<p>If you’re not already in that mood, you probably won’t enjoy yourself at a party.</p>
<p>I’ve thankfully found a great balance with my group of friends (some of them are now heading into their 2nd year of college). They’re academically-oriented and often talk about things like science and politics, but we also have fun. We party, drink and smoke or whatever, but not like every weekend. They know how to balance, and I love being able to buckle down and be respected for that but being able to have a good time, too.</p>
<p>Honestly, it’s just where you feel comfortable. If that’s not your scene, then hey, don’t try and force yourself into it. A lot of people don’t end up making life-long friends until college anyways, and people tend to find a better balance there.</p>