<p>With all the threads about "kids freaking out" and "mood in the house" this week I'm starting to wonder if my kid is not normal. He's not showing any anxiety about his nine college apps or AROTC app. Cool as cucumber. </p>
<p>A few times I've asked if he is having any second thoughts about his schools or ROTC. Nope. </p>
<p>He's been acceped at and received merit money and scholarship invitations from both safeties. Big yawn from him. </p>
<p>When his #1 school called the GC to ask "why don't we have this kids app yet?" Son barely remembered to mention it at dinner. </p>
<p>EA decision at #2 school will be out next week. Son read about that when he applied. But he certainly won't check his status at the stroke of midnight. Maybe later that day after his track meet, if he remembers. </p>
<p>Don't misunderstand me. He wants to go to college and is looking forward to it. He starts a lot of fun conversations about "when I go to college..." But it just doesn't seem to matter WHICH school he goes to. </p>
<p>Is he the only one acting like this? Is it a BOY thing? Am I alone?</p>
<p>“He’s been acceped at and received merit money and scholarship invitations from both safeties.”</p>
<p>This certainly helps!
I do think it is a “boy thing”–act cool & all. I wonder how my S, who has no outward signs of axiety, feels inside, though?? They can be hard to read.</p>
<p>Neither of my kids were stressed out about any of it. They knew they’d get at least some acceptances; they liked the schools where they applied, so what did they have to worry about?</p>
<p>Both S1 and S2 were pretty much like yours. S2 gets a touch more excited by the acceptances (no yawn, more general happiness, let’s his friends know etc). One of his RD school’s called last night to tell him about his acceptance and he was noticeably pleased and happy so I know he cares inside. S1 just quiety made up his mind which school and never gave it another thought. Neither kid is obsessed, freaking out, etc. etc. that you read about here. I think it’s healthy to be more like your son or my sons. Senior year shouldn’t take a backseat. It should be full of memories. If the kids are already consumed by what might happen 9 months from now, how will they enjoy senior year? College is not the end all be all, it’s simply the next step. I, for one, don’t want senior year to be truncated by too much focus on the “college thing.” Life goes too fast to loose an entire year to anxiety. I enjoy going through the process with the kids. Love reading about all the different families, etc., here. But I’m an adult and my perspective is not the perspective necessarily of my kids.</p>
<p>My D is stressed about everything and constantly overwhelmed (she has a tendency to take on too much) but she is completely calm about admissions since she got into her safety (with money). That’s why I forced her to put this school on her list (rolling admit and her stats are really high for it) because if she was not in “somewhere” by this time I knew she would be in panic mode.</p>
<p>I think maybe OP’s S (like my D) is fine with his safeties and everything else is just gravy. Why stress?</p>
<p>imo it just wastes energy to feel so anxious about something if you’re sure you’re at least going to be going somewhere. As for me, I knew my safety was a 100% certainty and I wasn’t about to have a nervous breakdown waiting for something beyond my control. What happens with the others will happen with the others. </p>
<p>So far I’ve had one kid who reacted pretty much like yours, and one who obsessed. The third will probably also be fairly obsessive. It’s just a personality difference. In my own family, the most obsessive kid is also the most focussed on ‘excellence at any cost’ - the least obsessive is more open to being intellectually drawn to what draws him, and is stubborn about not being forced into prestige-whoredom in general. </p>
<p>It seems obvious to me that less obsession is better than more, especially if the applications are getting done anyways, and the safeties and merit money are lined up.</p>
<p>I think it is somewhat a boy thing to be less obsessed - in my family it certainly lines up that way. It’s also the result of expectations - both familial and societal, I think. Anyways, I hope you’re enjoying it.</p>
<p>Lucky you! He’ll probably be very happy wherever he lands. I’m a big believer that kids can succeed at a lot of different places, and it’s the student, not the school, that’s the most important ingredient in the college education. It’s nice when a high school senior can be happy enough with all his prospects that he doesn’t need to be anxious.</p>
<p>Your kid is perfectly normal. I think the anxiety going on in the other threads is more about how the parent has approached the whole operation. When you tell your kid X is a reach school and accepts this very small percentage of its applicants and many of them are athletes/URM/legacy, but that getting into a highly competetive school is what sets you up for life, you set your kid up for anxiety and disappointment.</p>
<p>With goaliegirl, none of her 7 schools are reaches with a couple being safeties. This is primarily a function of the limited number of schools that have her 2 main interests (ROTC and Womens D3 Ice Hockey). 1 (her #3) is EA due next week (I think they considered all of the stuff on time otherwise it is rolling in January). Haven’t heard her mention it since the last of the paperwork was confirmed as received. The rest are rolling admissions and the only thing I’ve heard is that the discussion with the GC about whether to wait on her finals next week to send in the transcripts or not (not necessary IMHO on match and safety schools, as her grade trend has been fairly steady and there aren’t any surprises either way).</p>
<p>The only places I hear any anxiety - (and not much at that - especially the stuff we are reading elsewhere) concerns hockey and ROTC. We’ve all seen the chatter about reduction in the number of scholarships this year and the rumored increase in applications, so the scholarships are not necessarily the slam dunk they were in previous years. We’ve had one unit let us know that they want her and the coach there is arranging a scout to watch a game in the near future (1000 miles from campus). </p>
<p>We know that the list of schools will be narrowed when the ROTC awards her a scholarship to a limited number of schools (we will most likely eliminate schools without scholarships, as there isn’t enough difference between the 7 to be worth financial difference). Beyond that, coaches after watching her and/or other players may decide that they have other preferences. Some times a coach comes to watch you at your worst game of the season.</p>
<p>The biggest anxiety which she doesn’t really discuss, is the scenarios where the set of ROTC scholarship schools and schools where coaches want her after evaluating her don’t intersect. Not particularly likely, but I think she is going to cross that bridge only if it is in her path.</p>
<p>We’ve been through the admissions/FA wringer before with prep school 4 years ago. She never had much anxiety then as she always knew something would work out. And it did. In that sense, I think she is still that optimist, which protects her from any anxiety I may add as a parent.</p>
<p>So answering your question, no it isn’t just a boy thing.</p>
<p>D never was worrying. Still not worrying about admission to Grad. School - will apply next year. We go with the notion: be happy with what you have, do not worry about what you do not have, another way to say, there are plenty of doors that are wide open, why to worry about the ones that are locked.</p>
<p>No stress here either. S2 has six apps in: 2 EA, 2 rolling and 2 that had deadlines on 12/1. Two more to go for 12/31; one of those is nominally his first choice. But he liked all the schools he visited and said he would go to any of them. He knows he’ll be accepted somewhere, so why worry?</p>
<p>And although he’s aware of the EA notification dates, he won’t be checking constantly or staying up until midnight, either.</p>
<p>S1 just picked one school, loved it, admitted late October, never looked back. No stress then either.</p>
<p>I think the stress isn’t as apparent because your child already has choices at his disposal. Son was not necessarily stressed because he knew he’d eventually have a good choice because he was pretty happy with any of the schools to which he applied. But not having any answers until April was pretty stressful and during ED, I think I was more stressed simply because I knew there’d be either elation or disappointment any minute.</p>
<p>Nope. D never stressed about acceptances but was happy when she was accepted or offered scholarships. She was pleasantly surprised by her reaches but still chose the school where she liked the culture best, and not the most prestigous bumper sticker.</p>
<p>I expect D2 will pick the most prestigous bumper sticker and be more stressed out. Oldest is just not that into competition and liked all or her options from -1 to +25, but she’s been that way her whole life.</p>
<p>In my house I am the ONLY one who is anxious about admissions. If my daughter and husband were any cooler about it, they would be popsicles–not cucumbers. Arrrghhh. But then neither one of them is known for being demonstrative, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. My daughter got accepted to her first choice, but unfortunately it’s not going to be all that practical or financially feasible for her to attend school across the country. Not to say that it’s totally out of the running. But, I really want her to start showing some love for the remaining 6 or 7 schools she’s applied to here in California. So far, no emotion either way. She just quietly got her essays and apps. submitted. Oh, we read over her personal statements. But, none of the freaking out you mentioned. </p>
<p>All three of her acceptances have included nice merit scholarships. But, with the exception of one school, they really only make a medium size dent in the total cost.</p>
<p>Well, maybe when she starts hearing back from the CA schools with acceptances, she’ll get more excited. I have a feeling THAT’S when the anxiety is going to happen. Eenie-meenie-minie-mo.</p>
<p>S2 doesn’t act stressed, but I have caught him looking up to see when EA decisions come out - I don’t think either school has given a specific date yet. He truly doesn’t have a favorite school at this point - and has only visited half the schools he’s applied to, so I think he’s wise to keep an open mind.</p>
<p>HighlandDaughter isn’t stressed about admissions but her early’s won’t release decisions till next week. She’s more focused on other things - school, piano recital, etc.</p>