HRS…just keep in mind that an ED acceptance will not give you any options to compare your kid’s financial aid options. I realize you are targeting schools with merit only (or so it seems) for an ED application. But if you want choices in the end, this is not going to give you choices.
In addition, keep in mind the schools that do give merit aid that are in the top 50. There are plenty of those in the mix.
Re: safety and match schools…identify the characteristics of the colleges and programs…then look for schools with less competitive admissions that have similar characteristics.
@thumper1 right now his top 2 are Duke and Cornell. A lot can change, of course, but if that is still the case then if either accepts him, his dad and I will pay full. If both are “no”, then we start looking at value for $. And there may be schools where full is a good value.
@lookingforward I just don’t understand how you could possibly create a list without knowing what he wants in a school. You can find hundreds of schools that offer merit based aid, but if it doesn’t fit the son, there is no point in discussing. There’s a difference between guiding and taking the lead in a process that should be self motivated. OP should set a budget, set other mandatory parameters she sees fit, then have the son create an initial list of 20-25 schools that he is interested in that also fit the stated parameters, and visit some of the schools. That really should be the extent of the involvement in the college search process. As for selection, of course there should be parental guidance, but that’s far down the line.
The partying, alcohol, and weed was just an example of things someone may want in a school that they are not comfortable with their parents knowing. You could have a student who acts one way at home, but wants to party hard while at school. You could have a student who currently smokes and wants to do it without running the risk of punishment. You could have a student who wants a wet campus that will not punish underaged students for drinking provided they need medical assistance. You could have a closeted gay student who wants a school with strong LGBT activism. You could have a student who only wants schools with deep religious ties who doesn’t feel comfortable disclosing that with parents who may not share the same beliefs. These are just examples of things that may factor into someone’s search. These may mean nothing to you, but for some, this is important.
I set specific parameters for my search that I had in the beginning and carried through to the very end. So even if they are just starting, that doesn’t mean what he wants isn’t important. That’s all I’m saying.
Well, Cali, I don’t see how you can “know what he wants” without knowing what sorts and range of options he has, in the first place. And that, and related concerns, is exactly where we are, right now. Most of us explored first, got an idea, pursued it, and went through a learning curve, with our kids.
Nor can she give him a list of schools she’s willing to pay for, before those schools are vetted. Or even named.
It’s now early May. They can accomplish much by September. This Mom is savvy.
And, as several of us have said, not all kids are self-motivated. You’re missing the point that this son wants and needs a mutual process, at this time. Re-read, aim for the parent perspective, which is what we’re trying to let flow. There is no conflict here. The weed and wet stuff, the notion he’s gay or ultra-religious just distract, at this point.
@CaliCash understood. What he wants is the most important. I’m just helping start the search. I work in the general field he wants to get into (which I disagree with, but not my call at all), and he is super busy and has been sharing a lot lately that he is stressed out. He seems to appreciate the help.
Trust me, they tell me all their “shock value” secrets…I’m a very laid back mom. So they don’t hide much, and little shocks me.
A had a “list” on a scrap of paper. I’ve had him transfer to a spreadsheet as described above. I looked up the specifics for the sheet. He also leeks a naviance acct which keeps his “interested in” list.
I feel bad for these kids. They are busy every night, up till 12 doing homework. Weekends at meets…I don’t remember this much pressure!
My kids wanted to go to good schools. But I have to say, they were not under any pressure. This pressure often comes from the outside…so try to ease your student’s mind.
The reality is your student will grow where he is planted.
Sure, this college search can be filled with pressure and anxiety. But it doesn’t need to be. And in my opinion…it shouldn’t be about pressure and anxiety, and the need to get into a tippy top school. It needs to be about where the student can go to further their education towards meeting their long term goals (which can and do often change).
@thumper1 I think they pressure each other! He looks at Binghamton like it is the plague…and they have a fantastic business program. Just bc it is SUNY doesn’t mean it is not a great option. He hasn’t even seen it!
It’s almost like it’s just name rec right now. Maybe as he sees them he’ll find more to like, or not. Next month we are seeing U of Mich, Mismi of Oh and Indiana on a trip to a cousins graduation in Mich. anywhere else I can recommend out there? (My family is Ohio/mich).
Look into Carleton, which has fed-funded student retention program TRIO. Carleton also is ranked 1st for undergrad teaching excellence. And Carleton is paradise for the quirky super-smart kid like your son. Northfield is a pretty, safe, and well-served small town, 45 minutes from Minneapolis. Good luck!
If the religious situation is OK for you, I’d swing out of your way to check out Notre Dame - beautiful school, lots of spirit and excellent business school.
I’ve been following this thread since its inception and it sounds like you are doing all of the right things, and asking the right questions. And it sounds like you have a great relationship with your S and he has a good head on his shoulders. Your initial list is well-balanced b/w reach, match and safeties and I’m sure you’ll be tweaking it more as you visit campuses. The only advice I have so far, if he really wants Cornell or Duke (or any other top-20 school), definitely go ED. Chances are much better. I’m a Duke interviewer and I will tell you honestly that his stats are probably in the lower third of applicants, so he will really need to shine in his application. Unfortunately, if you are from the tri-state area, it will be even tougher due to sheer numbers. Also, I would not submit SATs to top schools, since the ACT score is much better. Good luck!!
@Cameron121 I guess I don’t get all these stats. If the2018 class of accepted middle 50% had ACT from 31 to 35, then how is he lower third of all applicants? Statistically makes no sense.
If it is other factors, I get that, but not his stats.
HRS Mom, If you go to visit Michigan, I can’t imagine your sone will ever view Binghamton as less than the plague because the comparison to Michigan will render it such. Take him to Rockland and Schenectady County Community College then swing around to Broome Community College. Then Binghamton. If you want your son to be excited about Binghamton you may want to stay clear of schools like Michigan, Wisconsin, Indiana, Texas, and other states. Focus on the SUNYs. Binghamton might be a tougher sell after seeing Michigan but it is a fine mid-sized public university with an attached nature preserve. Also stay clear of Cornell for the same reason. And Penn State or Ohio State.
94% unweighted translates to what on a 4.0 scale? 3.76? My son’s unweighted GPA is 3.87 (about 96.7%), 35 ACT, 2280 SAT. He didn’t apply to Cornell or Duke, but didn’t get into Notre Dame, Chicago, Swarthmore, Yale, or Washington and Lee. I think the point about the essays is pretty accurate.
Sorry, my post wasn’t clear - I was initially focused on his GPA, and I’m not too familiar with converting 100-pt scales - I thought it would land him around 3.7 on the conversion which is on the low end for Duke, but I’ve just researched, and it’s more like a 3.9 so that is much more competitive, esp with his AP classes. I apologize for confusing you with my ignorance. However, keep in mind applying to the top schools is sobering, with an 11% overall admit rate at Duke, many great kids like your S are shut out.
Addl info for you related to my suggestion to go ED - for the Class of 2019, Duke filled 48% of the freshman class via ED, with an acceptance rate of just over 27%. RD acceptance rate was only 9.4% this year due to the high number of ED admits and the huge applicant pool. Good luck!
Thanks for the info. We refer to these as crapshoot schools bc it is too hard to guess if you will get in!
if you give each class on a 4.0, where under 93 and under is 3.7, then add them. all and divide, he has then 3.87. If 90-100 in each class is 4.0, then he has 4.0. It all means nothing unweighted, which is why his school doesnt rank kids.
Yes, many here on CC call the top-15 “lottery schools”. The other thing on GPA, schools will recalculate their own GPA for evaluation purposes in their own proprietary way that you don’t even know about!! So all we can do is compare HS GPAs as a relative benchmark.
If he’s at all interested in UChicago you might take a short detour and take an official tour and possibly interview. Demonstrated interest is important at UChi. I second the suggestion you swing through Pitt, too. We got a lot of mailings from them and never visited or applied, but if I had a “do over” they would have been on my D’s list. Pitt can be very generous for top students. The ED decision is tough. Most top schools (Penn, Duke, etc) fill almost 50% of their class ED. If you are 100% sure of a school and if you’ve run calculators and feel you can afford, it’s your best shot at getting in. Imagine how wonderful it would be to be done with the insanity in December!
Otherwise, consider casting a wide EA net. Chicago, Michigan, UVa, Northeastern, etc. etc. As for Bing, totally understand the reaction. I’d suggest he apply early to SOM there (it really is excellent). He should get in. For 2018 class, they held a series of small group (maybe 20 kids) invitation-only events at top NYC firms. The Dean of Business school led one my D and I attended at Ernst & Young. It was a good way to get a sense of the business school there - and mingle with other accepted students. A very impressive event that, for a brief while, put the school on her short list. I wouldn’t visit Bing until after all results come in. Then if it should end up on a short list (due to how crazy and random the whole process is) you can always visit then. Good luck.
