<p>I see a lot of topics about this issue, which generally prompts homophobic comments about why so and so would never want a gay roommate. Bigotry at its finest... Well lets look at some reasons why this shouldn't even be an issue. </p>
<p>note: this is geared more towards men because 1) I am a guy and 2) girls are typically more accepting with homosexuality.</p>
<p>-Gay people are PEOPLE. Treat them as such.
-You are in college, so you should try being a little more open-minded.
-Diversity exists in college, and more importantly in the real world, which isn't always the case in homogenous high schools.
-Chances are they aren't going to be attracted to you. And even if they are, almost none would say anything. That would be inappropriate and uncomfortable for everyone.<br>
-They aren't going to sexually assault you... Being gay doesn't make you a lustful criminal.
-Don't freak out about changing clothes. They really don't care.
-Many gay guys have lots of female friends... hot female friends... --> Straight men like hot females... Connect the dots.
-If you find out that your roommate is gay prior to meeting him/her, don't make hasty assumptions... Not all gay men are feminine queens, and not all lesbians are the masculine butch type. There is a full spectrum of people and the community is very diverse.
-Focus on compatability issues that actually matter, such as sleeping schedules, activities, cleanliness, etc..., rather than sexual orientation.
-A good number of gay guys (though obviously not all) know their fashion. So if you're going out on a date/to a party and you try to leave the room with black shoes & a brown belt or pattern on pattern or any other faux pas, you can be sure that they will stop you. (sorry for the stereotype :p )</p>
<p>The list goes on and on... Feel free to add new points/comments.</p>
<p>So basically, stop the hate. The first week of college is stressful enough. Don't make it worse for someone who already has to deal with ignorant people on a daily basis. Be a friend; You might learn a thing or two.</p>
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<p>Far and away my favorite. </p>
<p>I can’t really think of anything else, but bravo :).</p>
<p>I’m bisexual so I can add a bit to this thread. </p>
<p>-Like with any other person, just get to know the person. Not all gay people are the same. Just like how not all white people are racist or how not all black people are ghetto or how not all Asians are good at math, not all gay guys are feminine. </p>
<p>-Instead of making assumptions, educate yourself. If you’re confused or worried about something “gay” related respectfully ask that person. </p>
<p>-We can be just as good friends as your straight friends. Just because we like dudes doesn’t mean we’re going come on to you. I can’t speak for all gay or bisexual guys but personally, I have respect for straight male friends. I could have the hottest straight male friend but since he is straight I would never come on to him or make him uncomfortable. I respect his sexuality and hopefully he could do the same.</p>
<p>This is pretty much perfect.</p>
<p>Thank you Ivystriker, for putting perfectly into words what needed to be said.</p>
<p>As long as my gay roommate was like the two gay guys in Big Daddy I’m cool.</p>
<p>False, don’t try to force your beliefs on me because it’s not going to work. If my roommate is attracted to guys, there’s no way I can undress/dress while they’re in the room without being uncomfortable. </p>
<p>Another thing I hate is when gays have to make it a point to let everyone know that they’re gay because I guess it’s gay pride week or something. A couple days ago I walk into a place at my school to get something to eat and right inside the main entrance there is a huge rainbow made up of balloons taking up the hallway with gay people shouting “gay pride” or something I was too ****ed to listen to what they were saying.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t care if people were gay if they didn’t have to make a big deal about it. Why don’t I organize a straight pride rally at my school then? Because I don’t give a **** along with the rest of the population. I feel it’s these young kids don’t understand that the rest of society is laughing at them. They feel that they are in the right.</p>
<p>I sort of agree with spyder, if you really want it(homosexuality) to be normal and accepted by society, treat it as such. You don’t see people putting up Straight weeks… why have Gay weeks? Seems like an attention thing to me, and should have been left behind in high school.</p>
<p>Er yeah straight people haven’t been considered perverted degenerates for hundreds of years. Gay pride weeks etc. aren’t an “attention thing” they’re an attempt to overcome centuries of bigotry by publicly celebrating homosexuality as something one doesn’t need to be ashamed of. The fact that these things bother you says a lot about your own attitudes.</p>
<p>Anyway my freshman year I had a gay roommate. Wasn’t a big deal at all. It’s actually confusing to me that someone would be uncomfortable changing just because there’s a gay person around… they’re not leering predators just waiting for the chance to rape you or something.</p>
<p>What does or does not bother me is not the point, the point here is that if it is to ever reach the state of being considered normal it’s going to have to drop the celebrations. At the very least this conversation wouldn’t have ever happened, so that’s at least 1 less argument about homosexuality.</p>
<p>For the record, I have no problem with gay people in general.</p>
<p>I don’t have an issue with gay people at all. I do have an issue when they try to stuff it in your face though. I came into my school as a theatre major. I expected there to be gay people but not to the extent and intensity of what I found. </p>
<p>I don’t even care if theres tons of gay people, but there seems to be this philosophy here that if you are gay you have to declare it to the world. You HAVE to dress gay. And you HAVE to exhibit the overly flamboyant gay attributes. Its almost to the point that i you are not gay, you AREN’T accepted.</p>
<p>Here we had at least 3 different “It gets better” documentaries filmed by news stations or made my film majors. The finished products made us straight people look like devil worshipers out to get the gays. </p>
<p>I’m sorry, but for gay people to be accepted, they need to start backing down on making their orientation known to the world, while shoving it in our face. The homecoming king at college this year was a gay guy. Thats great, good for him. But he walks around the student union making suggestive comments at everybody (including me a few times), making people feel uncomfortable by getting really close to them and looking at them weird, and really just exhibiting the gayest traits i’ve ever seen. Again, theres nothing wrong with being gay, but making everyone feel uncomfortable, thats where the line is drawn.</p>
<p>hey there are plenty of people in this world that are gay that are not like that either. The only reason you don’t hear about them is because they DONT “stuff their sexuality in your face”…even though I don’t really get what you’re trying to say. Plenty of guys that are masculine who probably don’t seem gay but actually are and they maybe quiet about it. you shouldn’t generalize…</p>
<p>And the sad part is that these attitudes are encouraged and fostered by the media. Sexual deviance, public nudity and open expression of sexuality have become mainstream. That’s “progress” for ya.</p>
<p>You don’t hear about gay people that are quiet about it, just like you don’t hear about straight people who are quiet about it. [How much attention does WBC get vs how much that gay pride parades get?]</p>
<p>There is just as much ranting and raving by straight people about being straight as there is by gay people about being gay. We just notice the LGBT rants more.</p>
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^Are you implying that gay people are publicly nude sexual deviants? Lol…</p>
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<p>We’re not creepers and we respect people’s privacy. If you have ever changed in a locker room or urinated in a public restroom, you’ve been “exposed” in the presence of a gay man, and unsurprisingly, you weren’t raped or even ogled. </p>
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<p>If a gay man doesn’t exhibit stereotypical behavior, then most people who meet him won’t know that he’s gay. Therefore, the only people who are identified as gay are those who DO exhibit stereotypical behavior. This leads to your incorrect generalization that all gay people behave stereotypically because those are the only gay people you have knowledge of.</p>
<p>^exactly. That attitude really bothers me. There are so many gay people that look and act “straight.”. </p>
<p>I started this to dispell some concerns, but of course it just led to more ranting about what I was trying to avoid.</p>
<p>Yes, some gay people are kind of out there… But don’t make the assumption that everyone is like that. Most people just want equality. </p>
<p>That includes… Marriage rights, marriage benefits, not getting bullied and harrassed in school, not getting thrown out of the house by your own parents, not getting rejected by your family and friends, not having to watch “family value” groups flood the media with anti-gay hate speeches, not being called a “sexual deviant,” not having to deal with hateful ******** in the churches… Etc. Gay people are clearly not equal in this country. If you really want them to just “live their lives” then stop acting like it’s a horrible thing. They show pride and tell the world that they aren’t ashamed of who they are. Accept them for that and the whole movement will no longer be an issue. But until then, people will fight for change.</p>
<p>Somewhat off topic from the roommate issue… Also, even if you think it’s wrong… Dont tell your roommate that. Keep it to yourself.</p>
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<p>Heterosexuality is celebrated every single day of the year. Diamond ring commercials, nuclear families on TV and in movies, and love songs all enshrine straight love as a virtue. If you get married to someone of the opposite sex, you’ll be showered with gifts and well wishes from everyone who you know. </p>
<p>Therefore, it’s entirely hypocritical of you to single out gay people for attack on this point.</p>
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<p>I agree wholeheartedly. To consider a parallel situation, imagine an Orthodox Jew rooming with a Christian. Would the Jewish roommate tell the Christian, “hey, you’re going to burn in hell for eating that pork,” or would the Christian say, “you know you can’t get into heaven unless you accept Christ as your savior, right?”</p>
<p>In general, people keep their religious beliefs to themselves; only when these beliefs involve gay people do people feel comfortable telling others what is “right” and what is “wrong.”</p>
<p>@Ivystriver2</p>
<p>most of the stuff you listed have nothing to do with legal equality. just saying cause you can’t really FORCE someone to think a certain way unless it’s by subtle manipulation blah blah blah… like you can’t force a racist to not… be… racist? he just can’t say it on national tv or something (but that doesn’t mean he can’t get tv coverage)</p>
<p>and getting thrown out and ostracized- nothing to do with legal equality. if people don’t want to be friends with you, one cannot sue them. </p>
<p>gah, i forgot what else i was going to say</p>