Another HS Senior Seeking Parental Advice!

Parents Forum
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<p>I've posted this in both the Tufts and NEU boards, but I really need an outside perspective, and I really value the opinions of the CC parents!</p>

<p>I was accepted EA into Northeastern's Honors Program, so for the past few months I've really fallen in love with NEU, especially because of the co-op program and all of the international opportunities. I really wasn't expecting to get into Tufts, but lo and behold I did, which places me in my current predicament. </p>

<p>NEU gave me $14,000/year in merit aid, while Tufts gave me squat (I know they don't give merit aid, and I was already pretty sure that I wouldn't qualify for need-based). So the finances are weighing pretty heavily in my decision. And to make matters worse, I got into BU's Honors Program with a half-tuition scholarship. (But I'm pretty sure I prefer NEU to BU since NEU actually has a campus... and I haven't been able to re-visit BU... a lot of people have tried to tell me that I should go there over NEU, but it just really didn't feel right to me when I visited it the first time)</p>

<p>But I really do love Tufts. I am in no way picking my college based on its name/prestige, but I've had a lot of people tell me that it is a no-brainer to pick Tufts over NEU. </p>

<p>I've been accepted Undeclared, but I will most likely pursue something in the International Relations realm... which is what is especially making this decision so difficult. Tufts has an absolutely fabulous program, but NEU has the co-op that would allow me to experience the field to decide if I am really as passionate as I think I am for the major.</p>

<p>I am absolutely torn, so I turn to the wonderful CC community that has supported me over the past year in all of my decisions. </p>

<p>^So I posted this a few weeks ago. Went to the Tufts Open House today-- it was fabulous, of course. But is it $14,000/yr better than NEU? I've realized that I've been somewhat brainwashed by NEU, just given the fact that I was accepted so many months ago, so they've been sending me so much literature and whatnot. </p>

<p>Today, my mom told me not to choose based on $, but what feels right to me. But I've tried taking $ out of the equation, and I just cannot do it. She sincerely told me that she and my dad would consider downsizing and moving into a new home (we just bought this one less than 4 years ago) or selling the small beach cottage that she co-owns with my uncle... but I would never be able to live with myself if I did this to my family. There is no way I am allowing her to sell anything of the sort just for my education. </p>

<p>Right now, I think the plan is that I'll go to NEU [if I absolutely hate it I'll transfer (perhaps to Tufts, but not likely that I'd get in again of course, or even to BU or something... even if I have to go to UMass... but I really prefer the city)] and then Fletcher @ Tufts for grad school (for International Relations).</p>

<p>I guess I'm essentially just looking for assurance that picking NEU is not a bad choice. Am I crazy for passing up Tufts? Please, be honest! People have told me that NEU isn't all that it's cracked up to be (especially given my interests... lots have told me that I should only go there for business or engineering). </p>

<p>Long term goal is to work for the UN, Red Cross, Amnesty International... y'know, any job that won't pay much ;) And oh yeah... I'm a bit of an idealist (having very realist concerns right now though!) </p>

<p>I better stop writing now... but I'll answer any questions! Any and all advice is extremely appreciated! </p>

<p>:)!</p>

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<p>NEU is a wonderful choice. It seems like every single kid D has talked to is touring NEU and LOVES it. Co-op program is great. </p>

<p>Tufts has a great reputation, but NEU is “THE Hot School” right now, and I see no reason for that to change any time soon. There was a front page article recently in the Boston Globe about how popular NEU is, and how it’s rapidly become an “elite” institution. </p>

<p>Honestly, I think you have 2 great choices here. If the money bothers you, go to NEU. If the money doesn’t bother you, I still think either choice is easily justified. It’s just whatever “feels” right to you. But I wouldn’t let any outdated notions that NEU isn’t prestigious sway you.</p>

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<p>^This is the reassurance that I need :slight_smile: Thank you very much! </p>

<p>I think one of my big concerns right now is just whether I’ll still be able to get a somewhat ‘typical’ college experience @ NEU given the fact that co-op (and study abroad, of course) takes you off campus so much.</p>

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<p>Blink I sent you a PM</p>

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<p>Listen to your mother! That said, you have two excellent choices, and the excellent school that feels right to you may not be the excellent school others would choose for you (or it might be). Frankly I think you should attend . . . . . whoa look at the time, I’ve got to run! Good luck with the decision!</p>

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<p>^Haha :slight_smile: They both feel right to me. I know that Tufts will challenge me more academically and whatnot, but @ NEU, I’ll have more opportunities to study and work abroad, which is very important to me. And I know I shouldn’t bank on going to grad school, but if I do choose that path, I think it’d be best that my my family isn’t owing almost $200,000 in loans.</p>

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<p>What wonderful choices you have. The only thing I would like to add is that you should honor your parents by allowing money to not play a big part in your decision. They most likely sacrificed more than you will ever know to get you to this place in your life and it would cheapen their gift if you pay too much attention to only the costs you can see today. Glad your an idealist, the world needs that. No mater what you end up calling your final vocation.</p>

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<p>I would also say “listen to your mother” if her options did not require selling real estate… If they do - well, this certainly is not a good time to sell (unless she was just looking for an excuse to get rid of the house or the cottage…)</p>

<p>It sounds like both options have their advantages…</p>

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<p>If you are interested in International Relations, I would check and see what kind of co-op options there are at NEU for someone with that major.</p>

<p>I have the impression that co-op works much better for some majors (business and engineering, for example) than others (in the liberal arts).</p>

<p>I think you are doing yourself a disservice by not considering BU – at least visit if you are in Massachusetts!</p>

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<p>Agreed that you should let your parents decide what they can afford, and if you choose the most expensive option, give them a big hug, and pledge to “pay it forward” with your own kids.</p>

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<p>All things being equal (as it sounds like with your posts), I’d go with the money. Remember, you might need it for grad school - not to mention that I think you’ll show up with a fuller resume (from co-ops) and probably end up with a better GPA (I would think that NU is less competitive).</p>

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<p>Absolutely. </p>

<p>Your posts show a lot of maturity. It’s a refreshing change from students who are angry that their parents won’t pay for the “dream school” inspite of the financial realities.</p>

<p>I have no doubt you’re going to very well at whatever college you chose. Best of luck to you.</p>

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<p>You are getting down to the wire and probably too late to revisit NEU. Sometimes your most recent visit is the one you end up wanting. But if possible revisit NEU even if you use the visit to end up ruling it out. You parents want you to be happy, but you are right, in that you would not feel good about them selling assets to pay your way. Make sure NEU is a distant second before committing to Tufts. If it is still a real close second that makes you really unsure of which way you would go if money was no object, then factor the money back in and choose NEU. If in your heart you are certain that Tufts is the best fit for you, that is what your parents want for you. Figure out ways you can help (loans for instance) that would make it so they did not have to sell their home or their cottage at this point in time - while they would probably take a loss on it in this economy</p>

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<p>I agree it is refreshing to read a post from such a mature young person. College is really what you choose to make of it - if you are motivated you will get a good education.</p>

<p>I’m in nonprofit too and I think you raise a good point that not being saddled down with loans after graduation will allow you more flexibility in employment.</p>

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<p>I know they have sacrificed a great deal, I just don’t want them to have to sacrifice so much more, especially considering that I really do like NEU. </p>

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<p>Oh, she definitely wants to keep both… we were very lucky to find an affordable cottage at the beach she’s been visiting her whole life, then a few years ago she got her dream home for significantly less than asking price. And I agree, this is really an awful time to be considering selling. I was really surprised by her sincerity in telling me that selling a house would really be our best option to try to afford Tufts. At Tufts they even told her that they have seen plenty of cases where students go that just cannot afford it, and they really get screwed over.</p>

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<p>Yeah, I do have to investigate this further. Co-op certainly works better for business and engineering, especially if one wants to do it for the $. I just want the ability to at least study abroad and have an opportunity to possibly work abroad. I think any international experience will really help me. </p>

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<p>I get this a lot! Haha. I know it’s a great school and everything (I would LOVE to meet Elie Wiesel), and I did indeed visit… I just didn’t get the atmosphere I was really looking for. It’s kind of a bit too much city for me… I need at least a bit of campus. I just felt a lot more safe and at home at the NEU campus.</p>

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<p>This is great advice. My mom is really overwhelmed by the whole process and is scared about what would happen if we weren’t able to qualify for loans and whatnot. But I will definitely be extremely grateful no matter where I go, since they are willing to basically entirely take on this financial burden (but I do plan on helping wherever and whenever I can). </p>

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<p>It’s not exactly that they’re equal necessary, just that they each have pros and cons. But I do think going with the money at this point is my best option, especially since I am considering grad school. I suppose I do have a better chance at getting a higher GPA at Northeastern, but I’m not really banking on that… definitely the resume that is making things look good there :)</p>

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<p>I really appreciate this :slight_smile: It’s what we learned in Psych as an Approach-Approach conflict… it’s a win-win situation, I believe… No matter where I end up, I’ll be questioning why I ever considered the other place. I am very lucky to be in such a position of having to choose between such great schools.</p>

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<p>It is too late to revisit. I attended EA Welcome Day in February and loved it. Then I went to Tufts’ Open House yesterday, but the whole time, while very impressed by the opportunities, I was slowly realizing that NEU has great opportunities as well and is a much more financially-wise decision, after hearing my mom’s conversations with the fin aid people.</p>

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<p>Again, thanks :slight_smile: I am very much an idealist, but I really need to look at this realistically. My family is very hesitant to pay $200,000 for my education in order to have me working a job that earns 10% of that annually. And I completely understand that. And like I said, I don’t want to turn around and have to pay outrageous amounts for grad school on top of enormous amounts of debt. I’m afraid if we get stuck paying a lot of $$, I might feel pressured to pursue a more financially lucrative career… I want to make sure I can stay true to myself throughout everything.</p>

<p>Wow everyone, thank you so much for all of the responses! I am extremely grateful and appreciative. All of your opinions mean a great deal to me! :slight_smile: And feel free to post any more opinions!</p>

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<p>My advice: Take the $ from NEU, make the most of every opportunity you find there, and don’t look back. You are the largest factor, by far, in your “college experience.”</p>

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<p>^That’s looking exactly like my plan! :D</p>

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<p>your post #15 makes it pretty clear you have decided on NEU
I think that is wise and that you will feel good about it</p>

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<p>Some years ago, I would have advised going to Tufts. But since then, NEU has risen tremendously in terms of both academics and amenities (it used to be a largely commuter school). The COOP system, I have been told, works well for the social studies and humanities majors, although they do not have to participate in it if they do not wish to. The $56k difference in aid is equal to a year’s worth of COA. Enough to finance plenty of foreign experiences.</p>

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<p>I agree that you have already decided on NEU!</p>

<p>Best wishes!</p>