@wisteria100 Katie didn’t seem like she was joking. The guy she was talking to made a joke of it though. I thought she was pushing back on bad behavior.
@lookingforward So then back to square one. The high profile guy at work can pinch your butt all he wants. I’m sure Katie asked him to stop. If management does nothing, your own awesome option is to leave your job.
Don’t think you mean me. I’m all for a sea change and regret how this is not firing up. My regret about Lauer is how he distracts us.
I don’t feel a dramatic slap is the answer, among various choices. How’s that equate to “all he wants?”
I thought the female CBS hosts, Gayle King and Norah O’Donnell, were stronger in their on-air statements than Savannah Guthrie and Hoda Kotb, but, in their defense, they just found out before they went on air.
But let’s face it, anecdotes where someone’s in a job with high demand, where they can just quit and pick among a rush of new offers, or where they’re paid so well they’re financially solid til they get the next position, are just anecdotes. Lucky few.
I’m often in favor of skipping the side distractions and instead identifying the core problem. Here, it’s not some random woman who stuck around, for whatever reason. It’s the male behavior choices.
@lookingforward No actually I did. I read your “you will face assualt” comment. I’m not being snarky to you. Just figuring out, if you have a guy like Katie did who is repeatedly pinching your butt, what can you do? I really think that Katie did both, ask him to stop and complain to management. For sure we know she mentioned it as his most annoying habit in an interview. What is left for her?
Are you saying she should have slapped him?
And for the record, “could have battery to deal with.”
@lookingforward No that is a fantasy. The fantasy where you get to fight back. It’s an actual question of what her options are because I’m sure Katie was smart enough to try normal measures. It was a real question of what is left for her to do but perhaps there is nothing. Maybe her public shaming of him helped a bit. Maybe publicly embarrassing him was her only power left.
Today, I’d just turn around and say loudly, “Get your hands off me”. No slap, but loud enough so anyone nearby could hear.
^It would be interesting to hear how Katie approached it. If she tried those normal measures and they were just dismissed. Telling him to stop I would think is something she did.
The more I think about the incident where the woman lost consciousness while being sexually assaulted, the more I think the police should be investigating this. I don’t know if it meets the criteria for the type of rape that has no statute of limitations in New York, but law enforcement should figure that out.
Overheard mid thirties professional man say to his colleagues - you better go to her meeting or it’ll be sexual harassment. They all laughed.
So we’re not quite there yet, huh.
And BTW, if a man continually pinches your butt and you finally say loudly, “Get your hands off me,” he’ll react as if you’re the one who’s wacko 'cause “you just can’t take a joke!”
If you were a friend of Matt Lauer you might have known or heard the gossip about consensual extra-marital affairs but you could very well not know there were others where coercion or harassment was alleged. You would, no doubt be shocked. I thought their responses on air were totally understandable.
Also I don’t buy into the abandon your friends for the good of sisterhood. I would not abandon a true friend in a crisis. That is different from feeling empathy for someone who feels wronged. I though both expressed shock for their friend and empathy for the accusers.
MODERATOR’S NOTE:
Again, let’s focus. “What should Katie have done?” is fine here. “What would you do?” goes into the general thread.
@VeryHappy And then everyone laughs at you. Something is wrong with you because you are no fun. And this guy is a friend after all and there is no sisterhood.
Finally the intern could easily have started looking for another job so she either reconciled her feelings or she was in s position where she did not have frequent contact with him. It is always the woman’s choice how they want to deal with a particular situation.
As far as the closed door office sex, that woman always has the option to go to the police who would certainly this week take it seriously if she was assaulted. But perhaps all she wanted was to get him fired and some sort of settlement for silence and that is enough vindication for whatever went on and she is happy with the outcome. I’m rather doubtful Matt Lauer ever forced anyone into sex without there being a back story despite all the purient thoughts posters have.
As far as Katie, she may very well have been annoyed at Matt for pinching her behind but I have every belief she could handle it in anyway she wanted including chalking it up to a friend’s annoying habit if she chose to. That is her right and her autonomy.
I am totally comfortable with companies defining sexual harassment and managing that process. I am also totally comfortable managing my own work relationships. I do not want male coworkers operating in a fear environment and closing off potential opportunities for engagement or working on a project with a guy because I am a woman. Generally those toe the line guys aren’t the bad guys in my opinion.
^So options that suck. What a surprise. You can leave your job. I’m sure Katie tried to handle it and probably had no support. You wouldn’t want men to feel uncomfortable. Women being uncomfortable no one cares about. And like many women who are raped, the sex in the office incident where the women passed out and was left on the floor, she said she was traumatized, humiliated and embarrassed. Hopefully it gets prosecuted now. Hopefully ML had jail time if it is proven.
I don’t believe I was the one who brought up women pointing fingers. My comments were primarily related to the people who presumed that Katie Couric felt unable to handle her relationship with Matt Lauren or suffered in silence. I think you are projecting a tad. Why on earth would you possibly think I would not encourage someone who hAd tried to solve a problem with another employee who was offensive to go to hr? I said an employee should try and nip it in the bud the first time it happens. Take a deep breath…
Katie seemed to have trouble based on her comp!aint of Matt’s annoying habit of pinching her alot. That points to lack of success in stopping the action which was annoying and demeaning. I think Katie is a competent business woman who likely tried all reasonable avenues of action.