<p>totally courteous*</p>
<p>Madrigal93:</p>
<p>It is clear to me that your decision is made if the qualms you had before BDD are magnified now. If the students did not “try to sell the school to [you]” I’m sure others would say the students were indifferent which is not the Yale I know well. Any school you go to will be asking you to add to their billion dollar endowment even before you graduate. No cold shoulder here - good luck at U of C and go knowing that even if that selection is unusual, it is the right one for you.</p>
<p>Several current Yalies I talked to were moderately negative about the other colleges I was considering. So the point made a few posts back isn’t 100% true</p>
<p>Having been an undergraduate at Y, a law student and med resident at H and having taught at H for almost–yikes–20 years, I can say that Yale as well as every other college has a particular feel to them that is difficult to quantify and the use of reason is merely a cover for the real decision maker–your subconscious a/k/a your “gut”. (ok, so I’m an analyst…). At the end of all of the hand wringing and asking for advice, you will KNOW where you belong.Go there. It is far far more important that the campus culture match your needs than any external validator. Yale’s culture is very strong (as Tom Lehrer wrote: “What can you say about a college whose motto is ‘For, God, For Country and For Yale’ and quibbles over the billing?”) and for some it is why they chose it (that is why I chose it over H for college) and for others it is a complete turn off.</p>
<p>Listen to your gut and feel which place seems like “home”. Go there–and never look back.</p>
<p>etondad - do you use both your legal and medical skills?</p>
<p>Totally agree with eton, it is crazy to choose a college based on what someone *else *said or did. You have to go with your gut feeling. After all, you are the one who is going to be “stuck” with the decision for the next 4 years.</p>
<p>@wjb, I never said the endowment was a bad thing, just something that is very apparent at the school. Also something that the students talk about a lot. </p>
<p>@nne718, the “bashing” occurred on a more interpersonal level. I had more than one student tell me how UChicago was terrible and the students didn’t have any fun there, also about people’s brother/friend/cousin who went there and had a terrible time. Not everyone was like that, but enough people did so it became apparent. I think it really has to do with Yale’s very strong school spirit and the belief that they are in many respects “the best.” I think that this is both a positive and a negative thing depedant on where you are coming from. </p>
<p>@eton, thanks for the advice and kind words, I couldn’t agree with you more.</p>
<p>You’ll find the same kind of talk at any school when you bring up having to make a choice. No doubt that at UChicago, people will talk about why they feel their school would be the choice to make over Yale, especially if they were given the same choice to make in the past. So I guess mentioning a specific school to students would not be the route to go when making a decision between schools. I think asking about their experience, without mentioning another place so that they will inevitably draw a contrast, would be the best idea. This goes for any school in the country. Then from there we can make the contrasts on our own.</p>
<p>nne718 - Madrigal mentioned early on in thread that people in Chicago were surprised that Chicago was being picked over Yale.</p>
<p>oh I just read when you said that people at UChicago you talked to consider it a bad idea to turn down Yale. That would be a big negative to me. Do you really consider it worse that people at Yale are telling you that you should go to their school instead of advocating for another one? I’m not trying to tell you to go to Yale, btw. If you feel like UChicago is a better fit for you, by all means go.</p>
<p>Congrats, you’ve made an excellent, well thought out decision. You will love UChicago.</p>
<p>I would consider it a bad sign if current students didn’t try to promote their school to visitors on admitted student day.</p>
<p>This is an interesting thread. When my (already decided) D attended BDD two years ago, she said the only negative thing about the entire weekend were the attendees who were undecided - they were noticeably skeptical and not much fun.</p>
<p>Hunt - Not just a bad sign, but the worst. Just ask current h students. freshmen especially.</p>
<p>Jeez… for all the people who keep wondering about an “inferiority complex” or that Yale is “bashing harvard” or wtvr – it just speaks to the fact that you really just don’t understand what a rivalry is. At all. Or you’re just missing the point. Rivalry exists NOT because one feels inferior / superior and NOT because they loathe each other. That kind of a relationship is just infantile jealousy or hatred – totally unworthy of great 300 year old institutions.</p>
<p>What then is rivalry? Rivalry is a competitive atmosphere between two schools for a single purpose: FUN. It is FUN to crack jokes back and forth and banter in a good natured way (like Dean Brenzel’s speech). It is FUN to paint yourself in red or blue and scream your head off for your school at The Game. It brings a sense of camaraderie to your own school and it also brings the two competing schools closer together.</p>
<p>Neither Yale nor Harvard suffers from an “inferiority” complex, and as many of you who suggested this pointed out, it is inane to walk around for four years focused entirely on ripping on another school. No one is disagreeing with you about that, but that is NOT what is going on here. It is a 300 year old RIVALRY, NOT a 300 year old animosity. Solely for the purpose of fun. Nothing more.</p>
<p>Go Bulldogs :)</p>
<p>Yeah. I mean, people who put down the administrators just for mentioning another school are being unrealistic. When you have very similar schools that are constantly competing with each other for the same pool of students, of course allusions to that competition, whether through light-hearted jokes or malicious bashing, are going to be made. I saw that happen at every single school I visited.</p>
<p>It’s a rivalry with some amazing twists: I was at the Harvard/Yale track meet today. Out of this dual meet, every two years, a team is forged that will compete against Oxford and Cambridge in June. Here’s what I saw: as the Yale competitor crossed the line, she turned and embraced the second place girl in a crimson shirt who she knew would be her team mate battling against the Brits in just a few months. The rivalry is a tremendous tradition, but for over 100 years, the teams have joined forces to prove themselves. Love the passion and courage that comes from this rivalry, but own that everyone involved knows neither school is truly superior.</p>
<p>If anything, when I told current students I was deciding between Yale and another (albeit non-Ivy) peer institution during BDD, they told me how much such-and-such friend/sibling/cousin loved non-Yale school and what a truly difficult decision I had, but they very much hoped I came to Yale. It may be the fact that you are also considering Chicago, which tends to illicit very strong and partisan reactions towards its culture, then the mere fact that you were undecided.</p>
<p>D2 attended BDD and was then going to visit Pomona, her other favorite. Some of the prefrosh that she met had never heard of Pomona and questioned why she would even consider a no-name college rather than Y. I was sad to hear such silliness which unfortunately is a turnoff to D2. I told her she would likely get that sort of reaction from a few kids at any school, but I think the damage is already done.</p>
<p>Well there are undoubtedly going to be some kids who value prestige over anything else, but really it all comes down to priorities – though I feel like their questions for your D were probably more out of confusion because they conflict with their own set of priorities rather than out of condescension or derision. If it did happen to be out of derision though then that’s disappointing because pplz should respect each others choices and priorities… anyway, really it’s all up to your daughter how much she weights prestige, campus life, academics, etc etc against each other – everyone has their own set of priorities.</p>