<p>i was just wondering how other freshman were doing. myself: i'm still struggling with friends, club meetings are starting this week so i'm gonna try to go to those (yay for commuters club and GSA) but no real friends yet, my grades in 1 class especially aren't so hot, and i just feel lost still...</p>
<p>anyone else?</p>
<p>I am not a freshman but I do help freshman at my school get into the groove. Keep making the effort......keep smiling.....if you look closely you will see that those around you are also lonely, wondering and close to bagging it. Is there anyone even in your living area that is not a freshman? Have you noticed another lonely sole that you can adopt as it were? Reaching out can help.....keep asking for a person to go along to a meeting.....ask lots until you find one soul. Keep us informed. You will soon be turning the corner to smiles and friends everywhere.</p>
<p>My first week or so was miserable, but I'm starting to pull out of it now. One of the things that has really helped is to do homework in the community lounge on your floor or in your dorm (preferably floor because it's more intimate). People will come in and out, you can ask what they're working on, make fun of your teachers, complain about the workload, etc. Also, ask someone on your floor to help you with your homework; you'll do better in class, and you'll meet someone. Another thing that helped me was when you see some people that you know, even vaguely, ask them to knock on your door when they're going to dinner or lunch or whatever. I've never met anyone who said no to that. Good luck, and you're most certainly not alone.</p>
<p>hazmat thanks for the kind words :) really! i wish you and bing121086 could be at my school!!! nobody here seems friendly :( and i'm also a commuter (i tried campus, i'm just not the type of person who can live with other people like that, i would've done better in an apartment by myself) but thanks really :)</p>
<p>First always keep in mind.....you have to be a friend to have a friend.<br>
Also.....this is kinda like you are now realizing that with any new friend, they don't know that look of yours, how you love peanut butter, that you little finger is crooked, your birthday, that the guy who dumped you is still on your mind......the stuff of your life. That does contribute to the lonely, isolated feeling. One hard part is to share something of yourself. It is a big step and you are thinking it is more than it has to be. At your old locations you all knew the nitty gritty.....here your goal is to seek out the nitty gritty. How about that bag of miniature candy bars where you walk door to door and meet folks on the cheap.....see how they come your way. It is all about the small stuff and you sound like a potential great friend. Keep smiling....it shows.</p>
<p>I'm no longer a freshman, but I remember very well how you feel.
Know that it will get better. It's a matter of time. The other people have given you good advice. I would also add to focus on classes, ask people to study with you, strike up conversations about assignments, go to lunch, etc. I know sometimes hearing this is really tautological and seems pointless, but I remember feeling really lonely, too. My second year I am much more self-confident. Once you learn the ropes, you'll gain confidence as well.</p>
<p>me. Im having a hard time too. I started out the year like yeah im gonna talk to people and make friends (i was the mouse in high school). But then I got sick and everytime i wanted to say something i had to clear my throat or my voice was gone. and i hated eatting with ppl cause i was always haking up something. Now that the worst of it is gone, most people see me as quiet and im fatigued from all the running around. Plus being a minority at probably the whitest school in the counrty people dont usually come to me when they look for lonely freshmen to talk to.</p>
<p>So i have kind of reverted back to my quiet self and debating if i should just make college a total academic persuit and not waste time on making friends when the results will end up like this. </p>
<p>But like my roomate said, i have 4 yrs and even if it takes me 3 to make friends i think its worth the wasted time.</p>
<p>get drunk......</p>
<p>^^^
Many of the people in my dorm follow that advice. </p>
<p>Getting involved in school activities will really help, I think. I was having trouble adjusting too (to make matters worse, I'm HORRIBLE with names). Since I've joined activities, I've really gotten to know lots of great people.</p>
<p>I was always shy in high school but this is a new start and a whole new chance to make a first impression. There is no better time to reinvent yourself than now. Don't be shy. Just go up to people and talk. Very few people will just push you away. I have so many good friends already just from going up and down the floors and knocking on every open door in order to meet whoever might be inside. Sure, I didn't particularly like every single person I met but I did make alot of close friends as a result. Now, I have a whole list of contacts that I can call up at any time whenever I need someone to hang out with. Just talk to new people, go to parties and meet people, join some clubs, anything, just dont wait too long or else eveyone will eventually form their own little groups and you will be closed out. And you don't want that to happen because it can ruin the entire year. Don't hesitate.</p>
<p>Knocking on doors ... hmm ... pretty intrusive but I guess it works.</p>
<p>I haven't even met any of my immediate neighbors yet. Really just don't feel like knocking on someone's door unless I have to. I've met a lot of people in clubs and at other halls within the same apartment complex.</p>
<p>Live 35 mins away from school...never there... don't even know anybody and its been a month :(</p>
<p>Transfer baby transfer.</p>
<p>Here there's no happy medium: either you get drunk every weekend (the majority) or you don't do anything (the few people I'm "friends" with). Oh well, I'm planning on transferring anyway...</p>
<p>I feel so sad when I read this stuff. There is soo much to do where I am. I can see why metro schools are very popular now.</p>
<p>Yes, schools in the isolated areas are where drunken parties happen-when you're snowed in during the winter, there's not much else to do. </p>
<p><em>waves to sister strain of Ebola</em></p>
<p>I totally agree with you guys. I'm a Freshman and it has taken me several weeks to get in the "groove" of things. I recently joined a Theater group on campus and it has really helped me. Don't be afraid to mingle with people. I was at first but I decided to just jump in there. Also, it is really good to join or form a study group. I live on campus and studying with people is a good way to learn and also meet people. Best of luck to you guys! -Gracie Denson</p>
<p>My D is on a Div 1 sports team so the first 3 weeks of school were immersed totally with her team. There was no time for anything else. She got injured and then had noone to socialize with everyone had grouped up., noone had room in their car. She got pushy and kept asking if she could go along and now has tons of new friends. Once they spent time with her they wanted to include her. She is very happy now with her choice and in fact loves her school. She is now part time back with her team and recovering slowly from her injury but plans to keep her new friends somehow. She said if she did not work at it she would have been miserable after her injury. She was determined to not be left behing in her room.</p>
<p>it's only been about two weeks in, but nonetheless I'm having a hard time adjusting. I really miss my really close group of friends that I had hung out with since 1st grade, and now nobody seems to understand me at all. I hate always having to make SO much effort to seek people out, but I know it's part of the whole experience with making new friends. It's so weird too because I knew so many people in high school and everybody knew me - but now I'm just another nameless face in the crowd. There's a few people on my floor that I'm pretty good friends with, but the rest are pretty distant. It also sucks when somebody on my floor comes in to visit my roommate but pretends like I'm not there. oh well...I'm really glad I'm not alone though, nice to know some of us are in the same boat...keep posting and sharing ur thoughts...</p>
<p>yeah...none of us are alone. which is good and bad at the same time, cuz i dunno about you guys: i wouldn't want anyone to feel how i've been feeling these last few weeks. and i agree with you neom3x11, i hate having to put out so much effort into making friends too :-/ i'm too lazy =-O:-X</p>
<p>TIBURON_GIRL - being a commuter has it's own unique set of issues - some of which you are experiencing right now. Having been a commuter - tho years ago - I can vouch for the fact that you have to just keep your chin up and keep trying - as hard as that can be at times. Don't know your schedule or if you work or anything like that - but I did find that starting up a conversation with a classmate helped alot - like asking if maybe a study group could be formed - or asking someone to maybe grad a bite to eat during break or anything like that. It does take effort when one does not live on campus and have the advantage of the other students around all the time.</p>
<p>Another thing that helped me was to get involved in on-campus things - but you may have to initiate that yourself as well - but you WILL find that there are many others just like yourself. If you happen to have any meals on campus - try to find someone you even might recognize - and go over and ask to join them - you may be surprised.</p>
<p>Hang in there tho - it will get better. Make the effort and you will reap the benefit.</p>