<p>Bulldog2000 parent, I certainly understand your disappointment. Your son sounds extremely well-qualified, and it is hard to understand his rejection. However, you should try to watch what you write-- “transitioning Yale to mediocrity”? Really? Those of us lucky enough to have kids accepted there (and I consider us very lucky, and blessed) might take a bit of offense. The fact is that there are far more qualified students than any of these schools can possibly admit.</p>
<p>Bulldog2000 – None of my business, but I just have to say that I hope you can soon rejoice in your son’s successes and get excited about his future. Your disappointment is understandable. But he has a bright college career ahead of him, and needs your pride and support. </p>
<p>Last week, a close friend of my son was admitted to several elite schools (including an Ivy), but not to the Ivy her parents wanted. They were disappointed and continue to rage and be upset. This lovely, brilliant, hardworking girl is now crushed, rather than excited and celebratory. </p>
<p>Your son sounds amazing, and is sure to have many more successes. Congrats to you both, and revel in his great achievements.</p>
<p>Donnaleighg, you are right. I apologize if I offended anyone. Unfortunately, I could not go back to edit my comments. Please just ignore them. </p>
<p>There is no doubt that Yale will remain a competitive school, and hope your kid and everyone else accepted there will all have a great education. Enjoy Yale, which is a truly unique school. No school, not even Harvard (hope my S will never see this), can match what Yale has to offer. This is the major part of my frustration and disappointment.</p>
<p>I think I have done enough venting here. Goodbye everyone. Thanks again for your comments and criticism.</p>
<p>Hey, bulldog2000, welcome to the rest of your life. You can be assured that many of your classmates are going through the same thing, or will be soon. (Some of them won’t – the luckducks!) Lots of Harvard alums, too. Don’t worry. You will find plenty to love at Dartmouth or Harvard, and Yale will survive the loss of your affection, whether temporary or permanent. Yale will get love from the kid it admitted instead of your son.</p>
<p>Been there, done that, x2 (and my wife is a Yale alumna, too, so maybe that makes it x4).</p>
<p>I think your thinking right now is incredibly unhealthy. Are you kidding? H and D aren’t Yale, sure, but they offer an array of incredible opportunities. They are not “less” than Yale in any way. They’re in the top .01% of colleges in the world. Your son is set up for an incredible opportunity. </p>
<p>Yes, there was an initial shock. Honestly, there shouldn’t have even been a shock. Ivy leagues and similiar admit such a slim number of applicants that no one should he expecting admission, no matter what. I’m a Harvard legacy with an array of EC’s, leadership, AP’s, top SAT scores, summer internships, the whole nine yards. Do I expect Harvard acceptance? Not in the least. I hope for it, nothing else. </p>
<p>There are thousands of kids with resumes similiar to your sons who were rejected to every Ivy they applied to. Your son was given two great acceptances and instead of jumping for joy you’re bitter. Frankly, you need to get over it.</p>
<p>Are grandparents considered for legacy? If so, and your son gets married and has kids, just think about the possible hooks for them to both H and Y. ;)</p>
<p>Bulldog2000,</p>
<p>I completely understand the frustration. You have been a loyal, Yale alum, who I assume has donated a fair amount over the years, and your eminently qualified son gets rejected. That is a bitter pill to swallow, and I would understand completely if you closed your check book to Yale. Perhaps to get some peace, talk with an admissions officer about what happened. </p>
<p>Did the admissions person you hired have any input into the actual application? Sometimes, I think that can be counterproductive as the kid comes off like a marketed product. Also, I think some admissions people make it harder on privileged applicants, especially because many of the readers come from Ivies but not from privileged backgrounds and they may recall one privileged kid at their school who was a jerk. </p>
<p>At least your son has some nice options at Harvard and Dartmouth, and it sounds like he will do great no matter where he goes. Plus, there is always Yale for grad school. Good luck.</p>
<p>I’ll just one additional thing that may make you feel better. My daughter applied to YHP (and of course others), and I think H was her preference. She’s a legacy at P. She was rejected by H, accepted by Y and P. She went to Yale, partly (I think) to avoid any possible stigma of “legacy kid”. Not to say that Yale isn’t a great school. But perhaps your son can feel “I did this all by myself” if he goes to H or D. Something to think about.</p>
<p>“Yale’s legacy admission rate is 20% and Harvard’s is 30%.”</p>
<p>I’d be curious to know what the cross-admit rate is. In other words, how much are these applicants helped by the fact that they’re legacies and how much by the fact that they come from smart, driven parents who know what it takes to succeed at Harvard or Yale?</p>
<p>One of the reasons legacy status can be more powerful at a school with fewer resources than places like H or Y is that the school is more dependent on alumni donations and generally it takes less money to make a financial impact. H, Y and schools like them have deep pockets and can afford to **** off a few rich alumni without hurting their bottom lines.</p>
<p>With all due respect, you need to step back and get a does of reality. When you say “no school can offer what yale has”…I think you need to figure out what has happened in higher education in the last 40 years. There are so many schools that offer a top quality education with many opportunities for learning both inside and outside the classroom that your statement is ridiculous. Many colleges offer a rich campus life, research opportunities, public service activities and access to top professors. Yale is only one of 30-40 US universities that has the type of resources and student body to create a very high caliber college experience. Yale has both positive and negative attributes…it no longer (never offered) a monopoly on the best college experience. Arguably, Stanford, MIT, Duke, Michigan, Rice and several other Ivies can match or exceed Yale. Yale is actually so mired in its past that it has been surpassed in sciences, business and even in many of the humanities by many other schools. If Yale could have been a transformative and forward looking school like Stanford or MIT, it could have made New Haven into a high tech center like Silicon Valley or Boston. Yale is just trying to catch up now.</p>
<p>You sound incredibly unreasonable, Mr. bulldog2000. With all due respect, if after years of Yale education and (from what it sounds like) successful career, you still do not know that sometimes life just does not go your way then maybe the Yale experience did not do you that much good and maybe it does not deserve your superstar son either. After all, the strong one does not always win, it is the winner that is truly strong (and I say this because somehow the admissions process is similar to a battle), and you need to understand this. Of course, sometimes life maybe unfair too, and it may be what happened to your son - but you both have to accept it. Yale is not the only thing in life. May you and your son move on quickly.</p>
<p>^^
Why get so harsh? Bulldog has a right to feel frustrated. It does not make sense that his son did not get into Yale, given that his credentials are just about perfect and he’s a legacy too.</p>
<p>On the other hand, as several commentators pointed out there’s a certain advantage in not going to one’s parents school.</p>
<p>And who knows, maybe Bulldog’s son will decide Harvard or Dartmouth is better than Yale. This could lead to some some entertaining debates at home. . .</p>
<p>Why so harsh? Because thousands of similarly qualified applicants were rejected at every ivy they applied to. OP should be sooo grateful for H and D admissions. We were very kind at first, then OP went on to say that there is no school like Yale, etc. I understand feeling frustrated for a few days. But honestly, this is like complaining about getting an 8 bedroom mansion instead of a 9 bedroom one. The kid hit the jackpot! The family seems to be able to afford it, and H and D offer incredible opportunities.</p>
<p>… and to me the whole thing even sounds like a joke.</p>
<p>I don’t think anyone who hasn’t had a child rejected by his/her alma mater really grasps the sense of personal rejection it creates. That said, I didn’t expect D to be accepted at Yale, and was pleasantly surprised that she got in. The letter Yale sent me in the fall as an alum parent of an applicant noted that while Yale accepts 20% of legacy kids, it’s not as big an advantage as it appears, because children of alumni tend to be among the most qualified applicants. The level of arbitrariness that Ivy (and other top college) admissions have attained is astounding, and I think as parents we make a big mistake in thinking that our kids are shoo-ins at any competitive school. (The only exceptions would be recruited atheletes and maybe Intel top 10 finalists or others at the top of their fields nationally.) I do think that plenty of superior applicants are rejected because they look too much like all the other superior applicants. Sometimes you just can’t win!</p>
<p>I find this very peculiar. I have seen little evidence that Yale typically rejects legacies with stats like these. GPA isn’t mentioned, but it must be OK if Harvard admitted the kid. If the OP’s posts are for real, one has to suspect that there was something negative that hurt this kid at Yale–perhaps some problem in the interview? Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense. This kid didn’t really need a legacy tip.</p>
<p>Exactly. I compared OP’s son on paper with mine. You know what? mine is better. But he got waitlisted by H.</p>
<p>I agree, something is missing here. I think Mr. Bulldog has an overwhelming sense of entitlement and somewhere along the line-- either in his own life as an alum or in his quest for his son’s admissions–really ****ed someone off over there. Frankly, I would stay FAAAAAR away from anyone related to him, if his responses here are any indication of his spirit. Let this be a lesson to all of us with the highest hopes for our children; when a HARVARD acceptance is a disappointment, you need to look in the mirror and ask the person staring back how you got to this place. Then, Mr. Bulldog, you need to tell your son in no uncertain terms that his accomplishments are stellar and that your misguided disappointment is more about YOU than him. And it is.</p>
<p>Your son is too academically focused, at least in Yale’s mind. I am just going to say it. 15 APs and an IB diploma either means that you had your son take online classes or that he self studied those AP courses, because no way could he have take 15 APs unless you had him do substantial amounts of AP in his first two years or that he took every AP exam for the corresponding IB exam (like AP English Lit for IB English HL). Heck, I am in the IB diploma program and I will only take 6 AP exams unless I decide to take a ridiculous amount of AP courses online. Even if the ECs are as strong as you say, Yale might see this as a possibly directionless, albeit talented, student. </p>
<p>Of course, Harvard obviously sees something that Yale does not, since his resume is still very impressive. Just do let it get to him, and he will be fine.</p>
<p>I don’t think we should get mad at Bulldog2000. While her son is obviously qualified for an ivy, as my guidance counselor said, all the ivies are a crapshoot. I’m no superstar compared to the four other kids accepted from my school to yale, but perhaps due to my highly personalized essay and the fact that i’m the first generation in my family to go to college, i was accepted to yale. but honestly, all the top 20 schools have nearly equivalent or equally awesome programs and opportunities, and the pluses and minuses from each school are so minute that they dont really matter. i wish all who read this post the best of luck and encourage them to use their opportunities wisely.</p>