Wondering if anyone has worried that the ED school their child is choosing isn’t the right one. We went through this two years ago and our concerns turned out to be completely unfounded and kid is very happy at the school. We have another one going through this now and have similar concerns but for different reasons - specifically, that she hasn’t done an overnight nor gone to a class at her preferred school. (For last kid, concern was that school was going to be too big, but it turned out to be a perfect fit.) I know kids change a lot during senior year so I guess ED can always be a worry, but I would like to hear whether anyone else has ever felt this way and how you handled (or whether you chose not to say anything).
Yes, for one of my kids. I expressed my thoughts but let them make their own decisions. Child wasn’t accepted ED and now attends a school that is a much, much better fit than the ED school and is loving it.
Not a parent here, but my father is concerned about the ED I’m applying to, but he felt much better after looking at the stats and realizing that I probably won’t get in anyways c:
ED would have to be far and away the number one choice if the kid wanted to apply ED. I wasn’t being aggressive, but your points are well taken. How is this student so sure this ED school is absolutely number one…and is her preferred school? Are there other reasons beside an overnight…and attending classes that makes it so?
None of my kids applied ED because they didn’t have a number one bar none choice in the early round.
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Wondering if anyone has worried that the ED school their child is choosing isn’t the right one. We went through this two years ago and our concerns turned out to be completely unfounded and kid is very happy at the school. We have another one going through this now and have similar concerns but for different reasons - specifically, that she hasn’t done an overnight nor gone to a class at her preferred school.
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I, too, wonder why you did ED rather than RD?
Now that ED is done, maybe the answer is to quickly do an overnight and some classroom visits? Or ask for the app to be put in the RD pool.
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So, you're saying you wouldn't let your kid pick the college they want to attend?
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I don’t think Thumper is saying that. I think she’s wondering why the ED rather than RD so that the child can choose once more info is known.
We were happy with the school my D went ED to or I’m not sure I would have signed the ED form. She (with our help) did all of her due diligence including 3 campus visits, an interview, and shadowing a student for a day. And she is very happy there now.
I can totally understand the concern, but my bet is that it will work out totally fine. My oldest did ED to a school that he fell in love with after only a tour. He is attending and is absolutely crazy about the school. In reality, there just isn’t all that much to go on when making the RD vs. ED decision. Even if the child stays overnight. Even if they see a class. Maybe they just happen upon a class that really interests them. Or spend the night with a kid they don’t care for. Either way, these are decisions being made with limited information, and they will work out or they won’t (in which case you’ll deal with it, right?).
I think it is easy to delude yourself that if only they did a little more visiting, talked to a few more people that the decision will crystalize perfectly, but there’s a big difference between visiting a place and living there. I’ve moved a few times, and to some extent, you make the choice and then later you really figure out the pros and cons of that locale. Not sure it is that different with a college choice.
After a basic assessment (do I like the size, the geography, the academic offerings, the economics etc.), the rest of it is a bit on gut feel of the child. And it’s their gut, so I think it’s great that you went with it.
My younger guy is applying ED now, and we visited another institution that is less competitive, but one I can totally see him at. But he feels clear in his mind about what he wanted to do, and he wanted to give himself a good shot at a school he can totally see himself at and where his stats are in the bottom half.
I hope your D gets into her ED choice and absolutely loves it just like your son. Some kids can and will be happy anywhere, but I think it is helpful that it was their choice. Then they are invested in it and have more incentive to create their own happiness there!
The older my DS gets (meaning month-to-month maturation), the more I feel that he would be happy at any of a number of schools. And they aren’t all similar. Several on his list are much alike, but a couple of others are very different. For each, he has well-thought-out reasons. He is applying ED (assuming that he stops polishing his essays and submits!), and he has made two EA applications. I do think that the ED school is a particularly good fit for him, but if he doesn’t get in he’ll be fine elsewhere. One of his EA schools is a safety, 99% chance of acceptance (dozens of applications from his HS in the last 3 years, and no one with anywhere near his stats has been rejected or wait-listed). Initially I thought that the safety was much too large, but now I believe that he would be perfectly capable of navigating it.
I’m thrilled with my d’'s ED choice. Of all the schools we visited think it is the perfect place for her. Only issue is, if she does not get in, she will have to get on board with a backup plan. There are a lot of other schools she really likes, but not nearly as much as this one. Her 2nd choice may be too much of a reach (dealing with OOS numbers), so if she doesn’t get into to her ED school, she needs to figure out what the next best school is
My D2 learned a LOT about her schools through the overnights and accepted student weekends. She had done day visits at all her schools, and sat in on classes at most. But 24 hours on campus was eye opening, and the two schools she’d likely have picked if EDing did not come across well on closer inspection (top schools, too). She was impressed with her longer visit to her #3 choice, and is a very happy junior there now. She says now that the top 2 would have been very poor choices for her.
The idea that “around here” you need to apply ED to reach schools implies giving in to pressure of what everyone else is doing. Just because a school is a reach does NOT mean it is the best school for your kid. Neither of mine ended up attending the highest ranked schools they got into. Reach does not mean “best for this kid”.
Especially because you have concerns, I’d see if your kid can do an overnight in the next few weeks. Then you can move the app to RD if appropriate, or feel more confident that ED is right.
I am really puzzled by this statement. I am not an expert, but everything I have read says that applying ED only gives you a slight bump because many of the ED acceptances are kids that are hooked in some way (legacy, athlete, etc) and so the acceptance percentages are misleading.
Also, I don’t understand the “Around here” portion of the statement. Does ED acceptance rate vary depending on where you live? I can see that maybe applying ED is so common at your kids school that people start assuming that it is necessary. My D says she doesn’t know anyone that applied ED because kids need to know financial and merit aid before making decisions. I find it curious that it is considered necessary where you live but not possible where I live.
That all said, back to your original question, I don’t think the fact that she hasn’t stayed overnight and attended a class is critical. While it may be common in some circles, I think the percentage of kids that do this is very low. There are several posts on this site from kids who never had the chance to even visit a school but are applying ED. FWIW, my D will not stay overnight at whatever school she chooses until her orientation session.
Add me to the chorus. “Around here, you have to ED for a reach school - it increases the odds tremendously.”
That is the common wisdom at my D’s school as well. But my D got into reach schools w/o EDing (and no amount of
ED would have gotten her into her reachiest school anyway and why have her process start with dismay). ED is a mixed bag- we saw kids get in and not get enough $$, we saw kids get in and be very happy, we saw kids not get in and have a very stressful late fall/early winter, we saw kids get into schools later that they were deferred from in the early round, and we saw kids get in ED and then really second guess themselves and even transfer later. I do think the whole ED thing adds a lot of extra stress to the process. Of course for many, like your older child, it works well and gets the whole process over with early. And it works for the schools (guaranteed bodies in the spots) so it’s not going anywhere.
Having said all that, if your kid has visited and liked it and on paper it seems like a good match for her, I expect will be fine! There are lots of things to be nervous about in the process so pick your poison!
If you are not qualified for a school, ED is not going to give you a boost. But if you fall into the higher range of the mid 50, or higher, it can give you a bump. At my d’s school almost all apply somewhere EA and about a third ED, but it is stressed not to do the ED casually. Many kids like the idea of being courted come April with acceptances in hand by several schools, but some with a clear first choice prefer to lock it up early if they can. There are also a lot of popular choices at d’s school that only offer EA and no ED, so that is a factor as well.
