Hi! So let me start out by saying I’m not actually in college. I’m applying to some private schools, some at the top of the list are Sheridan in Ontario and Ringling in Florida.
I got A’s in high school because I’m a complete bookworm and I happen to really like learning. I was always ahead and very studious so naturally I had a small circle of gamer friends(I’m going to school for Game Design), and not really that outgoing. Well my friends were always doing stuff socially that I could never get into, going to the mall or going to the park to play some sports, which I have never been good at to begin with.
Anyway, it occured to me in some survey I read about teen drug use that over half of high school teenagers have been to an illegal party, aka drinking, sex, drugs etc. I am not sure if that’s what people enjoy but honestly I am not appealed by it and I know it only gets worse at college.
So in case that was too long, I’ll summarize it in a TL;DR:
I’m a bit of a study hermit who likes books and video games more than people and everyone around me cares more about a beer keg than their bachelor’s degree, is this the norm and does every college kid have this innate need to party the time they could spend working, which is why people spend thousands of dollars on education in the first place?
I’m not in college yet either, so I can’t answer your question there. But I can tell you that myself, and most of my friends are all the non-party type, and will continue to be the non-party type in college.
Second, none of the things you listed are mutually exclusive with wanting to “party” a little bit.
Third, if you don’t want to party you don’t have to. No one is going to force you.
I wasn’t really a partier. I liked beer (still do) and I’ve been sexually active since high school (which I don’t associate with partying but that’s another story) but I think I was drunk a grand total of once (maybe twice?) in undergrad.
I met my now-spouse (we were friends long before dating) by walking around the dorms one weekend and finding a group of people playing video games. Some were drinking (lightly) and some weren’t. No one cared if you did or didn’t.
College isn’t like Animal House or American Pie… unless you want it to be. But it’s certainly possible to do the things you list (or not) and still be a bookworm/academic/gamer/whatever.
Colleges have all sorts of people. You definitely wont be the only one who has your interests and disinterests. Plenty of people don’t party (or rarely party). Just find groups of people at whatever school you attend who have similar interests.
I’m like you. Im a sophomore in college. I dont talk to anyone. Like today after class I came back in my room and haven’t been outside my dorm in like 10 hours.
You don’t have to party in college and you can still have an active social life even if you don’t party. Partying is a choice like many other things in life.
She made very good friends but partying was not big. Everything was small and low key.
The focus was always on the work. And there is a lot.
If someone DID want to party hard, New College down the road was famous for blow out Friday evenings. She never attended one however.
Lots of students aren’t interested in partying. My daughter isn’t, so she has focused her search on schools where Greek life is minimal or non-existent. You could also ask about substance-free housing.
Reading all this made me so happy xD it means that there are other people who are hermits as well.
I know that no one will force you but it kind of sucks when literally everyone around you is talking about getting wasted at prom and having a one night stand and all you care about is studying for finals.
I never heard of substance free housing but that might be interesting, thank you!
I’m a college sophomore… the only parties on campus I ever go to are theater cast parties (even if I’m not in the production- Im invited since I’m a member of the campus theater group), which only happen a couple times a semester. There’s alcohol at them, but I don’t drink it at all. There are many others at the parties that do the same. Nobody really cares.
I’ve never been to a greek party and have no interest. Still have friends that I hang out with, many of which have the views on drinking/partying I do.
@KravenArk I’ve never been much of a party person (senior in college here) - I would also rather get together with some friends and play video games or go to a nice restaurant, do other stuff, etc. I don’t drink alcohol, except for rare special events.
If this is the case and you don’t feel comfortable, then that could either mean that you’re at the wrong college or perhaps socializing with the wrong group of people. But this is usually fixable - sometimes by switching dorm/living group. Regardless, when you’re in college, you should try to find a group of friends you feel comfortable around - no one should force you to do illegal stuff.
The social environment really depends on what school you choose, and how prevalent partying is can definitely be a factor to help you choose a school.
Not everyone who doesn't party is a "study hermit," lol. Some of the most social people I know aren't really about the parties on campus and only go out occasionally. And some go out and don't drink, do drugs, or hook up with people.
Just because people like to party or feel that they need it to unwind after a long week of work, that doesn't mean that they don't care about getting their Bachelor's degrees. You can definitely have an active social life *and* graduate, and even graduate with special honors. You can have an active social life and love learning and get all As as well.
You're going to hurt yourself in the long run if you spend 100% of your time studying. Yes, you pay money for the classes, but you also pay money for the housing, the networking opportunities, the clubs, and the access to on-campus social events. There is so much you can learn from other people and so many ways that you can develop and give back to the community. You might be doing a disservice to yourself if you stay in your room all the time judging everyone else.
Substance-free housing is awesome, especially if you don't want to deal with loud dorm mates, vomit, and drunken roommates. Technically, freshman-only dorms should be substance-free (not sure if this always the case in policy, and it's usually not the case in real life, as many students drink in their rooms or "pre-game" for parties).
I think I was a lot like you when I was in high school. Didn’t go to prom (went to the after-party at the high school and was so bored). I’m a college junior, and so far I’ve only been to two house parties, at both of which I sat in the corner and just watched everyone (the social dynamics at parties can be really interesting, actually). I usually spend my weekends studying. But freshman year of college, all I did was study, and I was so miserable and burnt-out from studying too much. It took me a while to accept that life isn’t all about grades and coursework, but now that I have, I’m so much happier.