<p>So, I'm just wondering how many others are in the same position as me. I've got good grades, good ec's, but honestly have no life. And to clarify, I mean like I don't hang out at all with friends on the weekends. I don't actually do much fun stuff during weekends. Frankly, though I have a great gpa and stuff, I don't really care for it much. I think I'd be fine anywhere I got to college (save community college), and I just feel terrible being in this socialness lacking state. </p>
<p>I know a good amount of people (and no one like doesn't like me) But, honestly, I I'm not that close to any of them. My weekends are wholly spent by myself (with the feeble excuse of homework, even though I don't spend that much time with it). I've never gone to a formal dance. Etc, etc. etc. And I'm like if only this, if only that...</p>
<p>It seems like there's a point, in middle school and high school, when you make a ton of friends. I think I missed that boat. It's not like I'm hella shy, it's just that I find it hard to make friends anymore (as a junior). I have so many freakin regrets about what I should have done in high school, what friends I should have made, etc. I hate it. </p>
<p>My only like "worry" is what'll happen in college - would I be ok socially, will I be accepted, can I get a girl friend etc...sigh...</p>
<p>You have to apply yourself if you want to achieve balance in your life. College is a huge opportunity for just that, maybe you can start fresh when you get there.</p>
<p>My only worry is that I'll be public enemy #1 for making fun of everyone who likes what I don't and doesn't like what I do (which is a sizable majority). W/e, at least streich's coming in 09!</p>
<p>I'm 50% sorry for jacking your thread. Just be yourself...</p>
<p>meh...whatever. yeah, i get that college will be a new start. it's just i'd like a little practice now -otherwise i fear i'll screw college up as well.</p>
<p>Yeah, I'm pretty much the same way. I love to hang out with friends, but I'd have to have some friends for that to happen. I can go around at school and talk to almost anybody about anything, but I just can't seem to go out anytime. I have gone to several graduation parties this year, but those aren't really big social opportunities, especially when I have to go to 5 in one afternoon.</p>
<p>My problem comes from being extremely shy when I was younger. Since my school is really small, the people in my class now are the same ones I had in first grade. Everyone kind of remembers how shy I was, and they never ask me to do anything with them, thinking I'm really not interested. I'd love to go to a party or a game night, but I'd have to know who's having one. I must say, I'm gradually getting better about this, but it's really hard to start a social life when you've never had one before.</p>
<p>I'm kind of in the same situation as JBVirtuoso. I was shy and nerdier than I am now when I was younger, so people assume that I won't want to go to things.</p>
<p>I currently have close friends, but still not a life.</p>
<p>I disagree with the fact that making friends as a Junior isn't doable. Even in this past year (my senior year), I have made new friends. When there are people in your classes that you've never seen before for whatever reason, go up and talk to them! Even with people you've met before, you can go up and ask them about their weekend or something. It's really not so hard. Good luck in your social endeavors!</p>
<p>Oh, I'm so there. I've got great grades, do EC's, etc., but in the past year, I've hung out outside of school once. Once. Not even kidding, and even then I was mostly a third wheel.</p>
<p>While other people are moaning about not finding the time to go to all these graduation parties, I look at the one invitation in my hand, that everyone and their mother got. I feel loved.</p>
<p>I mean, I try to hang out with people, but plans have this tendency to fall through, or they've other plans. The one friend I'm really close to doesn't do hanging out. I ask her to, and she says "Why?" </p>
<p>I really hope I'm more outgoing in college. I don't expect a 180, but I hope I change at least a little.</p>
<p>I used to be in a similar position, but I have since learned that to have friends, you can't sit around and expect people to come talk to you. You have to ignore all fears, be confident, and be willing to open yourself up to others. You don't get shunned because you "missed the boat". It is because you made a mistake and made others think that you like to study and not hang out.</p>
<p>i'm a lot like that too. before it used to really bother me, but now i really don't mind. once i got more self esteem, i found it easier to make friends at school.</p>
<p>OP: You can worry as much about what might happen in college, but the thing is -you won't know until you get there. I'm almost positive that you don't have to worry. If most people pretty much like you, than it's not going to be hard to find close friends.</p>
<p>I used to be in the same position, and I just got sick of it. I was really shy but I hated it and started talking to random people and eventually got like 2 close friends. From then I networked friends. I would try the same thing. You want to have friends in high school, it just makes it more enjoyable.</p>
<p>Im pretty much in the same situation.
I get good grades and everything but i have no life.
Everybody in my school likes me (as a friend) but they
seem to think that I dont want to go out or something.
I have one really close friend though, so im not a total
loner. Next year im going to a new school, where i dont
know anybody, so i hope i can get more confident and
start making some friends. Part of the reason i dont have
a lot of close friends is because i am a really shy person.</p>
<p>I'm sorry you've given up friendships for grades. Yet, legolas, it sounds like you WANT to have friends. Then just talk to kids and start to make friends. If that means you have to do poorly on a test or skip a homework, trust me, it's worth it. What I find on these forums is that some people are soooo concerned with getting good grades and getting into colleges that they don't take the time to have serious relationships with people. I've seen that happen to others, and I feel bad. Think of it this way... not getting into Harvard isn't the worst thing in the world. Maybe you end up going to a state school like Penn State or Rutgers. Are you screwed for life? Not at all! You just don't have the best job for a few years.</p>
<p>I kinda went on a tangent there, but I think you get my drift. It's NEVER too late to make friends.</p>
<p>Thanks a lot for your replies! First of all:</p>
<p>
[quote]
I'm sorry you've given up friendships for grades.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>njwhitekid, I'm sorry I might have miscommunicated. Let me clarify. I put in some effort to study, but I honestly waste most of my time doing stuff other than studying (digg, youtube, etc). So, like it's not that I don't have time (probably true for many people reading this), but that I don't have the opportunities handed to me in a silver plate (as some, not all) people do. I would "give up" great grades for ok ones, but I don't think it's like a zero sum game. I think you can have them both. I think it's like one person said - it's the mistakes we made. But, I still believe there are things you can do to alleviate it. I think I feel a lot like Pathetique. </p>
<p>I don't feel like a loner, but I don't feel part of an active group of friends. I had one close friend at the beginning of hs (still my friend), but he's not big on hanging out and stuff - just his personality. And I lot most of my other friends to their sport friends. Now, I know a lot of people, again, because people generally don't have a problem with me, and I say hi, maybe a little small talk, but I am a little awkward, and well, I don't have a close set of friends I'd like to have. </p>
<p>By the way, I'm planning on starting a blog (so we can have posts with discussions on topics like shyness, socializing, trying to make friends, etc with high school people). I think it might be really helpful. Anyone interested?</p>
<p>I agree with maea, making friends in junior or senior year is not at all impossible. I've cemented most of my best friendships within the past year or so, and am still building on a ton of others. You just have to give it some effort.</p>