<p>I'm a little torn. My roomate can be very nice-- sporadically. She's on some sort of hormone medication and is quite a loner to begin with personality-wise so... she can completely miserly, moody, selfish and resentful most of the time and strangely nice and friendly in select other times. Plus, she's sort of dirty and her things smell. And she's pretty much obsessed with her computer and the internet. </p>
<p>She doesn't really have friends, and we have mutually not made any move to be really friendly towards each other. Mostly because she didn't seem to want to, even though at first I was really accomadating and understanding. Now I've decided I don't want to waste any more effort trying to understand her when she's snapped at me several times for no reason. She can be quite sullen and surly, and other people have told me they find her a little "scary."</p>
<p>What do I do? It's not like I get sex-iled, and it's not like she sells drugs or steals my things or calls me names etc. But I have caught her looking at my things when she thinks I'm out of the room (as in, I've walked in on her peering at my computer and what I've been writing) and I've caught her several times giving me awful looks at me behind my back (creepy...). She is becoming immensely uncomfortable to be around. She isn't so much a bad person, as moody. And anti-social. And smelly. And rather non-respecting of basic privacy sometimes. You get the picture.</p>
<p>What should I do? My RAs might laugh at me for complaining about these things, when other people are going through bigger crap with their roommates. But it's gotten to a level of discomfort and awkwardness and sometimes outright animosity that I feel trapped and unhappy. </p>
<p>Have you gotten a roommate change before? Was it a good decision, in the end?</p>
<p>I hate my roommate, I'm in a pretty similar situation as you. I won't switch unless I find someone I like that I can swap with, because honestly it could be a lot worse.</p>
<p>Your dorm room should not be a place where you feel uncomfortable. Your roommate should also not invade your privacy...by the way, isn't that illegal? Change right now and don't worry about whether the decision willl hurt her feelings. You need to do what's best for you. Don't suffer the year being miserable.</p>
<p>Change while you can. My roommate was TERRIBLE. She actually just transferred rooms this weekend. While she was here, I couldn't get any work done (my midterm scores were ****), and now that she's out, I've finally got a good working and living environment going for me. Change now. Don't let this person ruin your college experience, and, in my case, GPA.</p>
<p>I have to write papers and do problem sets at MY desk. I picked up some unusual study habits in high school, but they WORKED, so I can't really do anything else. I do my readings in the library, though.</p>
<p>Actually, that happens to my best friend on a regular basis. He comes and studies with me in my room or goes to the library.</p>
<p>It's frustrating and should have been discussed with her (like, telling her you need to study at your desk and comprimising to a book lamp or desk lamp) but does not qualify for "horrible roomate" status.</p>
<p>Your situation doesn't seem that bad, it's just learning to adjust to living with people different than you. Compare them to my freshman roommate experiences 5 years ago...</p>
<p>First roommate was a party-animal that would yell at me if I was up before 11AM. She normally got up long after I was at classes and partied every night. She would yell at me if I was typing on my computer while she was in bed. She also told me I couldn't tell her mom she was out smoking if she called during that time. Well I ended up moving out of that dorm, but more of because I wanted to be with my friends across campus. At that time I was in a dorm on the opposite end of campus from the freshman dorms and it was up a huge-butt hill nicknamed cardiac hill.</p>
<p>Ok...so I moved to the freshman dorms and got what appeared to be a good roommate at first. Then I would find notes on the doors at all times of the day (i.e. Monday afternoon at say 3pm) saying she was in the room with her boyfriend and to knock before entering. Once I walked in and they were in their underwear so I stopped even attempting to go in when they were together in there. When I got a boyfriend (now my fiance) she expected me stay in his room (he had a single) every weekend night so she could have her boyfriend in our room. Most weekends I flat out refused. I wasn't into sleeping in a bed with my new boyfriend that was a twin sized bed, no way! </p>
<p>Consequently, I began spending a lot of time out of the room studying and hanging out with my friends. She then blamed me on her failing grades (oh yeah...and her failing relationship). Well, would that be because of me being away all of the time? Don't think so. Could it have been because of her study habits of studying with her bio book on her chest while falling asleep watching either Cartoon Network or BET? Most likely. And then one evening when I was trying to get to sleep to the sleep timer on my alarm clock (needed to drown out the music from the bar below the building...could hear it word for word from the 16th floor...grrr...) she threatend to 'punch my face in' if I didn't turn off the music. Well, this was the time I decided I must go to the RA and work out the problem or find out about options of what I could do to get out of the situation. She scheduled a meeting with me and my roommate that turned into a joke. My roommate flat out called me a racist for never being in our room and defended her position for threatening to 'punch my face in'. The RA said 'you can work it out, just give it time' and let it be. Well, I was ticked off that she didn't reprimand my roommate for threatening harm on me but held out until the end of the semester.</p>
<p>Luckily she decided to get a single the next semester. I heard a rumor that she ended up getting pregnant and dropping out of college. So...it could be much worse! Talk to your RA and see what she suggests and try a remediation.</p>