@thumper1…we live in Rhode Island and have exactly 2 instate choices, one of which is not an option and both of which are significantly below the girls in average GPA, ACT, etc. We are also not from here, and in a state 40 miles wide, they just wanted to move on. We do get discounted tuition at some other new england schools and they both were accepted to the honors program at UMass Amherst with about $14k each in merit money per year, putting it below $27/year, very doable. Trying to make something better work for them, but I’m sure they would be successful there too. We did look at calculators, I’ve devoted my life to this process since last summer. UVA is a solid option and less expensive. And one of my girls got into Northeastern’s honors program with $20k/year…likely where she’ll end up. But when they are all out of state, really it’s not much difference…$65k-$70k seems to be standard.
It’s been overwhelming with two at once, applying to mostly different schools, and of course great creds so they are getting into the tough ones that don’t give merit money…and as we’ve established, we are not FA candidates. Oh well. I truly appreciate all the advice. This is my first posting on CC.
@twogirls…Tulane is affordable but my daughter is afraid of the party culture and didn’t enjoy her honors weekend visit. We may have to go back. I’m from Rochester and it’s so cold! Her award there would still put tuition over $50k. Tulane would be about $35k. If I can’t negotiation with her top choices, she’ll have to learn to love it. 
This is the decision many people are faced with every year. Go to the full priced Ivy or to the school that is offering merit to Ivy caliber students? How much is the Ivy worth to you? How much is BU worth? Is Wash U worth more?
You said they chased the merit money and got it, but they just didn’t get it everywhere. That’s unfortunate but not unusual. At this point all you can do is wait until all the offers are in and decide which is the best balance with academics and finances.
@AroundHere… This is very helpful! As I stated, more than half of his total compensation is not accessible to us, but I did pull fro the correct lines on our tax return to answer the questions. I do think it might be worth explaining. Can’t hurt. A lead on a CPA that specializes in FA would be wonderful if you know someone. Thank you so much!
Did they have the stats for auto merit aid at University of Alabama? Or any other schools where merit aid was guaranteed?
They applied to a great list of schools…but most with pretty competitive merit aid, and high prices.
Even the SUNY schools at full prices for OOS would be cheaper than some of the options you are posting here.
I guess what I’m saying is…if cost is a big consideration, then look at the schools that are affordable, and jettison the rest.
If none are really affordable…maybe Gap year with applications next year targeted more towards merit financial aid potential.
@twoinanddone … I know this is a common dilemma. You are all so patient with my whining. “First world problems” as my kids would say. We chased some merit money because there were two, and we only applied to the top tier schools in the event that they got nothing. We never intended to go if they got good offers, and so far, $30k at Tulane, $32 at Fordham, $20k at Northeastern, $20k at Syracuse, and a few others…so we are VERY GRATEFUL and I’m so proud of how hard they’ve worked. Just a bummer that BU in particular couldn’t come up with anything because a) I don’t think it’s that much better than Tulane and b) the other twin will likely be at Northeastern and while they don’t want to admit it, I think they’d like to be close to each other. Going to try to appeal and if I’m successful, I will surely write a post for all!
PS for anyone wondering, the “difficult” twin chose her schools mostly for their neuroscience/cognitive behavior/premed programs, which is why they are all over the place!!
@thumper1 …I have NEVER heard of auto merit aid! Never seen it written anywhere. Will definitely look into it just out of curiosity! They wouldn’t be happy at Alabama anyway, and they do have the UMass option if it comes to it. We planned to pay about $30k per kid per year, so we just have to decide how much debt beyond that we want to incur. Hard to tell kids no that have worked so hard, but it’s time to grow up and face the reality of budgets and personal finance!
(Actually just asked my daughter and she said she gets emails about that sort of thing. I was in the dark! I guess they aren’t schools she would consider. Maybe if it were 100% at her own cost she would!! Thanks for the tip!)
I believe your twins would also get URI tuition at University of Maine.
My kids worked really hard too, but just weren’t as successful as your kids as far as stats go. They went to 3 high schools, moved in the middle of one year losing 3 weeks to the move and different schedules, different grading systems, and getting what I considered a subpar GC at the last school.
Most kids applying to top schools have worked hard, giving up social activities for academic ones, staying up late to finish a project. Sure there are a few who can get all As and perfect test scores without trying, but those are few and far between. My hardworking kids didn’t even have $30k per year to work with as my job ended and everything I saved had to be used for living expenses. They survived. They like their colleges. However, they are 2000 miles apart and sometimes that is just the right distance. They never tried to go to school close to each other but just focused on schools that would be good for them.
My brother and I attended the same college at the same time. We never saw each other.
My research shows UVA at $61,994 OOS. But I’ve been low on everything. We didn’t even look at the packet. She was accepted to UMich and UVA the same day and it was a no brainer with the neuroscience program at Michigan. Unfortunately they are slightly higher. The best “deal” on my chart is UMass Amherst at about $27k/year. The New England reciprocal tuition program is not instate but not out of state…somewhere in between…and it’s for MANY colleges throughout NE but you have to major in something URI doesn’t offer. They just chose UMass Amherst but could have gone with several. None are remarkably better than the other. Maybe UConn would have been the highest ranked. In general, state schools aren’t as fantastic in NE because we have so many outstanding private schools. Thats what I’ve been told anyway. I went to UF!
No…University of Maine offers YOUR instate flagship tuition to attend U of Maine. That is a U of Maine program…not the New England reciprocal program.
https://go.umaine.edu/apply/scholarships/flagship-match/
If the schools that have given you merit aid are affordable, does it make sense to do a bunch more last minute applications?
@AroundHere
I am NOT advocating for last minute applications. At all.
If the current schools are NOT affordable, I would suggest gap years…and totally new application lists with more of any eye on the finances.
BUT it sounds like the OP has some affordable options for these kiddos…
@twinmom71 What kind of stats do the twins have?
Post #20, the instate options in RI, are far below your twins stats. Frankly, @twinmom71, there are top students in all state flagships including RI. That is quite an obnoxious statement.
Post #30 “state schools aren’t fantastic in NE.” You are new to NE but believe it or not many bright kids will be attending these state flagships in NE and then go on to very successful careers. Upper middle class families in NE can no longer afford privates and do not receive need based aid. They are in the donut. These students are now attending their state flagships in higher numbers, likely in the honors programs. I think you’ve never even been to half the flagships that you so easily dismiss. You’ve never worked with people who have graduated from the flagships. You’re apparently basing this on "what you’ve been told.’
Remind your premed D that premeds need to minimize their undergrad loans/costs because FA for med school is loans, loans and more loans. Maybe you could persuade her to consider attending a less expensive school if you offer her some of the $$$ you might otherwise spend on undergrad toward helping defray her med school expenses.
Rhode Island doesn’t have a state med school so your D will be looking at OOS publics and private med schools–many of which are now in $80-110K/year range. There is precious little grant aid available for med school.
@twinmom17 you will find high stats kids at every school… including state flagships. There are many kids graduating at the top of their HS class who can’t afford Ivy League and similar schools. My advice is to put the affordable options on the table and let them choose. You can appeal for merit or FA… keep in mind that you have to qualify for FA every year… and any increase in salary etc will reduce the aid. There needs to be a 4 year plan in place to pay for such schools in the event your aid decreases.
On one hand, you have this “dreaming.” On the opposite end, the true financial realities of what we can reasonably afford. I think most of us try to find the right sweet spot that works for the family, today, during the years we pay for college, and in the aftermath.
It will help to get away from the notion that, if one gets into an Ivy, the other may be left with “lesser” choices. The real point isn’t as much the external rep as where our kids can fit and thrive. We want them to explore and grow. That’s a process. This point was made when my friend’s twins went to a very top college and one further down the list and the latter was happier and more productive.
It always stops me a bit, when kids state neuroscience as their intention. Most have had only a glance at it, in high school, don’t have much perspective on how it’s studied. Many will find other new and exciting avenues in college. Ideally, they go in with that flexibility.
@gearmom I’m sorry if I offended you, but like everyone who posts, I am entitled to my opinion and have to do what is right for my children. I know there are fantastic kids at every school, but it is a fact that the state schools in my state as well as many in NE are not very highly ranked. I’m sure they have many wonderful things to offer, we just chose to apply elsewhere, particularly since out of state tuition is about the same as a private school.
I was simply asking the question–has anyone successfully appealed or negotiated with a college. Both of my twins have never gotten less than an A in the highest honors classes available. They each will have completed 9 AP classes between junior and senior year. While doing this they have been 4 year varsity athletes, class and student council president, state science fair winners, etc. I tell you this not because we are in competition with you or anyone else who has been so helpful here. In fact, I’m sure they are just like the kids you mention from upper middle class families who aren’t receiving aid and are “in the donut”. We aren’t special. And that’s why I came here for help. Because I’m certain there are others just like us and I was wondering if they had any luck making a dream school affordable.
PS…I’m not that new to NE. Lived in two states here for the past 7 years and I know many state grads. I happen to be a state school grad myself. I have not easily dismissed anything nor have I criticized anyone who makes the choice to attend a state school, and both of my girls got into the honors program with money at a NE state school. That is an option. Thank you for your post.