Anyone with a child like mine? Advice, please

<p>My third child is a junior in a large Miami magnet school. International Baccalaureate, so it's rather rigorous and he's doing well (3.55 unweighted). His interests are television production/film and mixed martial arts, and that's about it. He's a bit of a character, with dry humor, and very independent minded - think Hugh Laurie's House character (as a teenager). More respectful than him, though. I am SLIGHTLY at wits' end because I'm suspecting that with all of these colleges/universities looking for the same thing, ie strong test scores, strong gpa, strong ec's, strong leadership, where is there room for the calmer, independent-thinking, introspective, introverted individual? They are not going to appreciate that they have this type of applicant, unless they've got essay questions which address this. Not everyone's a team player, or interested in the leader/group dynamic. Some people are just solo flyers, I guess. How do those people get seriously looked at, unless they're bringing an art portfolio or scoring 800 on the physics SATII? My son and I respect each other enough not to pile him into clubs, activities which are only for show (which the powers that be can see through, anyway.) Any illuminating stories and advice would be gratefully accepted.</p>

<p>Sarah Lawrence struck us as a great place for artsy individualists. I think they have film stuff going on. They don't look at SATs. Vassar has a lot of film opportunities and I think most "types" could fit in there. It's reachy, but they probably give a slight advantage to guys. See if Goucher has film. It's an artsy place with lots of dancers, so it might have martial arts.</p>

<p>I thought Vassar as well!</p>

<p>'They are not going to appreciate that they have this type of applicant, unless they've got essay questions which address this.' </p>

<p>Almost every college has the opportunity to create an essay on...'a topic of your own choosing.' That's where your son will shine.
Best of luck to him.</p>

<p>I would say that our son was somewhat like yours. He preferred being a "normal teenager who preferred spending times with friends and doing the things he really enjoyed rather than participate in organized activities. The one exception was music related and even here he balked at the idea of taking private lessons to improve his proficiency to award winning levels. He was a good student but not a grinder in a quest for strait A's.</p>

<p>As a result his college applications, while very good, were not ones which would jump out at adcoms at highly selective colleges. But continuing his laid back style, he chose to apply to less selective colleges like RPI, Case, Oberlin, et al. They apparently did like what they saw, even so far as to offer him very generous merit scholarships. Well not Oberlin, but the others yes.</p>

<p>And what was most pleasing is that he found his niche in college, has been an overachiever academically and wandered into a compsci specialty as a junior last year which he is very excited and I might even go so far as to describe as passionate about. But he is still not inclined to participate in organized activities, preferring the company of friends to take up his valuable spare time. </p>

<p>My advice would be to continue to be his geuine self and find colleges who want him as he is. Once a student gets away from those highly selective colleges, things like a successful IB diploma and and slightly off beat interests have the makings of a successful application.</p>

<p>investorscooter, I am going to venture to guess that these boards often seem to be disproportionately populated by parents of the type of student you describe. And, perhaps it is true that the HYPS schools, in fact, seek that type of student--I don't really know.</p>

<p>That said, there are thousands of other colleges out there, and hundreds of them are truly excellent. The task ahead for your son is to find the colleges that suit him.</p>

<p>A reminder: the rec. letters can also effectively convey your son's interesting, quirky self. So choose those writers carefully, and if it is appropriate for his situation, your son can tell the writers that he is looking to help the adcoms have a glimpse of his personality.</p>

<p>have you thought about schools like Hampshire, Bennington, Sarah Lawrence, etc?</p>

<p>Oh, Bennington is a GREAT suggestion. We didn't go see it because my son refused to look in-state, so I forgot about that one. Absolutely look at Bennington and Hampshire is another good suggestion.</p>

<p>Please clarify, investorscooter:</p>

<p>You mention television production/film and mixed martial arts. Are these his current interests/activities, which do not fit the teamwork/leadership paradigm, or are you also saying that these are the areas he wants to pursue in college?</p>

<p>Reed college</p>

<p>My son was also one who, in high school, heard his own music (still does), and he is now in his third year and extremely happy doing three majors at Tulane. They were happy with his interests in music and robotics in high schools and high standardized test scores--happy enough to give him a large scholarship. They also provide undergrad research opportunities, if that would appeal.</p>

<p>Chapman has a terrific television/film program. His distance would be a plus. He should also check out Bard.</p>

<p>Honestly, I believe that most colleges are looking for students who stand out somehow. When he applies he should take his differences and accentuate them (the essay is a great opportunity to do that). Otherwise, the colleges would be filled with the same sorts of students and they don't want that. I remember standing next to a Dad who was chatting with an admissions counselor at Grinnell. He asked how a quiet person could stand out from the crowd of leaders in the thousands of applicants. The admission counselor said that Grinnell, just like all schools, was looking for all kinds of different students and was trying to build a class with variety. She said there was room in the class for all kinds of students.</p>

<p>Personally, I do not think your son will have any trouble with admissions. The trick will be for him to find places he would be happy at. This CC board can make a parent nervous thinking that everyone has a 2400 SAT and a 4.bazillion gpa. That isn't real. Your son is real.</p>

<p>Cooper Union, Reed, St. Johns (NM or MD), Whitman, Cornell College (IA), Colorado College</p>

<p>
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a character, with dry humor, and very independent minded -

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Leave him alone when he writes his essays so that his writer's voice shines through. It's not so much what he writes about, but the way he approaches a topic, that will tell a good Adcom all he needs to know. You can spot these kids a mile away, and for the positive. They make up an important part of any class.</p>

<p>A school with a strong film studies program such as Wesleyan also comes to mind, not so much for film production as for critical analysis. If he looks at Chapman U (Dodge College of Film and Media Arts), look at all possible departments there. The competition for directors is keen, with admission rates quoted at 8-12%, but for screenwriting majors the admission rate is 25%. Check the admissions stats for each kind of media major before assuming he's going to be a director, and his admissions chances might improve.</p>

<p>Please also look at the "arts majors" section in CC's for many threads about programs with film production. </p>

<p>He might also be a great general student. Many people who enjoy film enjoy it for certain reasons that they can explore further in college into other major areas. Today, to "like film" is almost saying, "he loves to read" or "he has a passion for literature." Try to explore that a bit deeper and pin down what it is about film that intrigues him as a scholar.</p>

<p>I see you're in Florida! I hear lots of excitement about FSU as a film department within the university.</p>

<p>The "safety" for people fascinated with films or possibly interested in producing or writing for them is to include some schools with B.F.A. programs but others with
B.A. programs and a film department major. He might like to look at Emerson (Boston), Ithaca College (upstate NY), USC (near L.A.), U of Michigan at Ann Arbor, NYU Tisch, as well as the others mentioned in this thread so far. </p>

<p>There is a big difference between choosing a place like Wesleyan, to major in film studies for critical analysis, compared to USC or Chapman where there's a large emphasis on film production.</p>

<p>Look at the admission portfolio requirements long in advance, if he wants to apply for any film production majors. Often they are in addition to the regular college or university application. So allow extra time to produce these supplementary materials.
He should be reading about film studies already as a hobby to write a credible application, I think. I'm sorry to add to your feeling of stress, but let him know if he wants to actually enter an undergraduate film production program, to begin research now. The good news is that his personality, "chill" and observant, is a good description of someone who could work well in many aspects of film: production, direction, writing, stagecraft...</p>

<p>PS, for TV, add on to the list: Syracuse University, and either Boston College or Boston U (can't remember which one). I'm also wondering if there's anything in Atlanta for him, perhaps at Emory, since CNN is headquartered there. </p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>I'd second Emerson; definitely worth a look at.</p>

<p>^^timed out, another good feature at Chapman U is the comraderie among the students of film and TV broadcasting. In terms of production facilities, it is brand new and cutting edge at the Knox Studios. Chapman is 45 minutes from downtown L.A., while USC is in the heart of L.A. so that's a difference to consider.</p>

<p>Also, there are many Wesleyans; I was thinking of the one in Connecticut!</p>

<p>Interesting that someone else mentioned it here, but the school that immediately popped into my mind was Oberlin College in Ohio. It's full of incredibly independent, off-beat types who are always questioning presumptions. I don't know if they have anything in film / TV, though. </p>

<p>In retrospect, I dismissed it at the time because I was more straight laced and riding heavy football recruitment. If the me of today were looking at schools, I'd seriously consider going there. </p>

<p>Also - I ended up at Cornell and my entrance essay was just a stream of consciousness. I don't remember what I wrote, but I just let whatever came to my mind flow out without regard for what they were looking for. It showed my independent streak and I got accepted so, don't presume that these schools are just looking for a certain type - they're looking to build a mixed class of many types and interests. Your son sounds interesting enough that with the right opportunities he could do some really interesting things with his life. Just make sure they see that in the letters of recommendation and somehow in the essay.</p>

<p>Wow, some great ideas and new colleges to look at! One of his requirements is close proximity to city life, and so a majority of LACs unfortunately aren't really an option (like Whitman, Grinnell, Oberlin, Cornell C). Also, diversity is important, having been with international types throughout his childhood.</p>

<p>(Answer to mafool: His television production/film interests might be better suited for a campus activity rather than a major, since he's not running around with a camera like a little Spielberg, so I don't believe it's a passion, and his work is not super artsy. He's generally the "go to" guy when anyone needs something filmed or edited - probably because he's very reliable and self directed. The martial arts is his de-stress from IB.)</p>

<p>He does believe that a liberal arts education would help him ferret out his "path in life". He's a generalist, in truth, and so doesn't really stand out liking math/science better than English/history, for example. Maybe he's a late bloomer, hoping that a spark will ignite in a college atmosphere. I think anything at a super large state school, or preprofessional would be sub-optimal, he enjoys his relationships with his teachers. So I think we're targeting either small universities with liberal arts colleges in suburban/urban environments, or larger LACs.</p>

<p>I'll check out the recommendations above, and thanks for pointing out that not all of these kids are ambitious rocket scientists. Sometimes I forget...</p>

<p>your son sounds like my daughter - off beat and never quite fit in with the whole "high school" thing - she did her own thing. 1430 SAT's equally gifted in english and science.
She got filled boxes with mail she would not even look at. One day at the end of her Junior year - I said isn't there any place you want to visit this summer?<br>
she pulled out a viewbook from the bottom and said - sheepishly- here.
we had driven her to school after school she would not even get out of the car. We visited the school she picked and she fell in love and that was it for her. In the end - she found her school. A tiny 3rd tier LAC with a very "different" atmosphere. She majors in chemistry and while the department is tiny - she is a big fish in a little sea and gets a lot of mentoring and individual attention. Her worldwide experience was two weeks in London studying Shakespere theater.
For her this was a great choice.
"Top tier" colleges aren't for everyone - even those who on paper would be a good fit. He will find his way.</p>

<p>I'm getting a better picture of your kid from your second posting. Remember that anyone who is the "go to" kid for editing and so on IS a teamwork person. You want to perhaps figure out how to express his personal approach to things and express it positively. For example, he might have some keen social intelligence that lets him get along fine with others, such that they do involve him in their projects. Does he influence them as he works on things with them? That's another form of leadership, by that I mean, influencing the direction of a project with a suggestion, tweak and so on. That's not brassy leadership, like being president of a club, but it is a form of respect that others come to him for his dependable contribution.</p>

<p>In a way, I think he needs to really find language to express and embrace who he is. I could imagine such a student writing a very insightful essay on any topic. He should begin to understand his strengths rather than mourn or dismiss others. I'm a bit concerned he could sound diffident and passive, uninteresting unless he can put his own style forward. Essays that reflect on an experience, on what the personal meaning of something is to him, will be for him. If they ask about leadership, redefine leadership to mean, "influential within a group project" or challenging himself solo in martial arts. Not every leader is an elected leader.</p>