Are they really stressing “elite” and “ivy” or are they stressing Princeton and Penn specifically? I ask because if they are really just stressing the Ps specifically, then what’s driving them is probably a very different motivation than if they are just stressing “ivies.”
If they are really just pushing Penn and Princeton then it’s probably mostly that they want you to follow in their footsteps/have such fond memories of those schools. They may be mentioning those other things, but it isn’t really about getting an elite or an ivy education, it’s about going where they went. It’s about fulfilling fantasies they have probably have had of having a kid who lived in the same dorm as them or going to reunions together, etc.
For example I had a high school classmate who was 8th or 9th generation legacy at Harvard. His parents wanted him at Harvard. Period. End of discussion. Yale or Princeton? NO way was he allowed to go there (and you surely can’t argue there’s a real difference there from a prestige standpoint). His dream actually was Williams if I recall. Obviously a very different environment from Harvard, which was more suited to what he wanted, but just as elite and prestigious. They weren’t having it. He at least was able to get out of applying early to Harvard (they didn’t allow him to apply early to Williams like he wanted to) but in the end he ended up at Harvard (and had a good time FWIW).
So clarify for us (and if you’re not sure, maybe you need to clarify for yourself) whether this is really about making sure you get a prestigious education or about making sure you go where they went.