<p>@Eiffel: The question though is, is your reserve and deportment reflective of your actual attitude, that actually tells of a sophistication and acculturation that many lack, or do you use it as a shield to fake nice and run off to talk crap about people behind their backs. If the latter is true, then it is pretention and self-righteousness, and appearing to be chill. But I doubt it from the tone of your post. I’d assume the former. (Sophistication, culture, and actual manners) :)</p>
<p>I’m talking about individuals who try too hard to be politically correct and nice in front of large groups of people. But when they are directly approached, they seem very reserved and sometimes defensive. They don’t like to show that emotional side because they often feel threatened as if that sense of strength and confidence will be spoiled. Close friends (if they are lucky enough to have real friends) can really see how insecure they are. They also extensively talk about people behind their backs. </p>
<p>I guess being pretentious can have its benefits, we all do it to a certain extent, more or less. I’m talking about people who do it too much.</p>
<p>I don’t think “reserved,” meaning “marked by self-restraint,” is the best word for what you are describing. You seem to describing someone who is critical of people but is unwilling to discuss or defend his opinions. Someone who is reserved would not be openly critical of someone in the first place.</p>
<p>no matter where you go, there will always be people that suck. </p>
<p>It’s true though, that a lot of people in Nor Cal are fake. They will pretend to be your friend but won’t think twice about making fun of you or tarnishing your (good) name. A lot of people show their true colors in college.</p>
<p>@physics: Have never said anything to the contrary about other places. I know all too well people can suck no matter where you can go. And I’ve been to and lived a lot of places, including other countries. I just know people love to talk about how other places are so much worse and how “Real” and “Tolerant” the Bay Area is. I actually thought Texas was more “real”. Yea, some people there are intolerant and bigoted, but at least they are open about it and unafraid to get in people’s faces so to speak. I always felt, unless I knew someone pretty well, and even then, there was always this level of distrust, but I had to put up with them because they may or may not actually be my friend. Other places, I found, it’s usually REAL easy to pick out who is actually a jackass and who is not right away. And I noticed a lot of the same viciousness people at Cal and in the general area complained about in other places being amped up and brought out for even the pettiest reasons, and thoughts and words being put into people’s mouths all the time. Not a good experience. It’s very hurtful, you can shrug it off, but it makes you hard and distrustful.</p>
<p>@Liquidus: I suppose that is what I was getting at. “Non-confrontational” is a term I’ve heard used to describe people who are both overly politically correct and nice in public, unwilling to discuss or defend opinions, and get extremely defensive and go for the utterly illogical when called out. Yet, they are more than willing to lambast, complain about, and attack others behind their back. No, that’s just a worthless craven little scumbag. That’s not ‘non-confrontational’. That’s a coward. Pardon my harshness. People like that are just not worth anyones times and anyone who actually listens to them? Just as bad if not worse.</p>
<p>“Non-confrontational” should be an appellation for reserved people or people who just want to remain neutral and have no strong feelings either way.</p>
<p>andrewtx-
How about the countless total p**<strong><em>s who act mouthy and aggressive because the internet provides them anonymity, yet cower to confrontation in real life? I’m stunned at how few people call out that s</em></strong>.</p>
<p>^^ How would you know if Andrewtx doesn’t confront people in real life? Have you ever talked to him in real life? He offers very interesting ideas, unlike you, a conceited hypocritical loser who should realize true failure when it stares at itself in the mirror. I guess I’m calling out that “s***” right now, Mr. Ugly Beast. As far as I know, he is much more logical and has more experience than you. I’ll be waiting for your insult. Don’t think too hard…</p>
<p>Since when did this become digg?</p>
<p>I wasn’t referring to him and was saying it more as a general statement- I actually more or less agreed with his post and had no reason to insult him- but I admit I left that ambiguous. My bad.</p>
<p>Way to go apes*** though.</p>
<p>lols this thread is funny</p>
<p>
Maybe you live a perfectly efficient life where every minute is calculated precisely, which allows you to maximize your time. For many people like me, that is not the case. I live almost 2 miles away from my classes, which means I often traverse the campus on long walks that take around 30min. Also, it is not very easy to be always on task. The average college student probably gets distracted around one minute for every five minutes he/she spends studying, which means that another 8 hours will be spent wasted. </p>
<p>The ultimate question here is: what is enough? Yes, from a mathematical perspective, 30 hours is a lot of free time, but considering how a good amount of the time is spent stressing out about school and on extra curricular activities meant to improve chances of getting a job/grad school after college (ie research, internship, career oriented club) there really is not much time to truly “enjoy”.</p>
<p>Hey guys, lets not pile in the swear words. I know you feel like you need to swear like crazy to feel legit, but it just makes the conversation go downhill.</p>
<p>I agree with andrewtdx about the “non-confrontational” thing. People who hide behind society’s fixation on “neutrality” and being PC are not only idiots who can’t think for themselves, but yes, cowards.</p>
<p>@Aznnerd: Anecdotal evidence, but the attitude most people have coming to college is definitely not academics first. A lot of people come here for “the college experience” and they flat out say it. Additionally, the school does not require you to stress out. As I said before, people come in here hella cocky, so why is it Berkeley’s fault for them not being able to live up to their college app boasts? (speaking of which, the sole purpose of ECs is not to pad your future app/resume).</p>
<p>I think what Berkeley was getting at, were the people who go on places like Juicy Campus (or whatever the current version of it is), and make fun of or talk trash about people. Not attacking me. I did not perceive it that way. And oftentimes, in my meandering experience, the people who do that are the same that claim to be “non-confrontational.” It’s why I call the “non-confrontational” thing a shield and coward’s tactic. Basically, they know if they spouted off their nonsense in real life (and a lot of it is extremely nasty and vitriolic without any real grounding. 99.9% of people don’t deserve the venom that gets slung at them, and the internet ■■■■■■ know that.) at the wrong people, they might find themselves with missing teeth and expensive dental bills.</p>
<p>Out of curiosity, when you guys say “PC” are you talking about people who get mad about others saying “white board” rather than “dry-erase board” (which I think is really stupid)? Or just about people who say things like “same-sex marriage” rather than “gay marriage” (which I think is perfectly valid)? Do you guys differentiate between different degrees of political correctness or do you think all political correctness is stupid? Personally, I think there are certainly varying degrees of it.</p>
<p>@Eiffel: I do as well. I don’t think people should run around calling each other racial, social, sexual, or other epithets – but I think some people take it way too far and use it more as a form of social control, especially over other people because they feel they have no real power. When I complain about political correctness, I’m speaking more of people saying what they think you want to hear and then getting highly defensive when they are challenged. It’s the “Beautiful Lie” cycle. Or they make blanket assumptions about you and your character when you don’t toe the line so to speak. That’s what I complain about when I hear “political correctness.” More of a dogmatism of ‘happy-double-plus-good’ thought, that is borne of as much ignorance as the very dogma that it was created to object to. (Racism, social oppression, etc.) I mean, read the article in the East Bay Express about Berkeley High discussing cutting science courses because certain minority students do not seem to excel and thus it is unfair. Rather than addressing the social and economic malady that causes these kids to fail, the ‘Politically Correct’ attack a symptom or a perceived symptom. It’s like using cold medicine to fight a virulent strain of the flu or even chronic bronchitis. Sure, it might make people feel better in the short-term, but it never solves or mitigates the problem.</p>
<p>I was also referring to people who are too cocky to learn for their own goods. In Cal, I have met people who say that they don’t need to learn anymore… By giving off that PC, they think they are actually “perfect” but really far away from it. I used to be close to somebody like that. The sad reality is that in the end, nobody knows how and who that person is. And that person is always in his/her little conceited world, too far from being enlightened. This type of people may end up with a lot of acquaintances but really no true friends who give a damn about them. It was exhausting for me trying to be a friend to somebody like that, always trying to act perfect and invincible. This type of people are too afraid and out of touch to show a single sign of vulnerability or emotion. What’s up with that?</p>
<p>Indeed, I know people who are like that clear. I think its more of a form of extreme insecurity, and this fear that people will see through them. And when someone does, those same people then become extremely nasty, either to your face or behind your back. I think a lot of people at Cal also never know real loss or tribulation. There is no reference point for which to grow. Then they run into issues at the school, whether it be academic, social, romantic, and/or health, and they want to blame the school and not themselves or seek a way to grow. That would require too much introspection and work. I was pretty cocky when I got in. Maybe not as much as some students, but I have long since gotten more than my share of lumps and it serves as a great reference point on how to frame my world.</p>
<p>What the heck is this topic even about anymore.</p>
<p>Doesn’t sound like Cal kids are really that happy…LOL</p>
<p>This thread is hilarious, I came to this forum to educate myself about Cal and this is what I found, a bunch of people talking about how unhappy they are. Although, the people who are happy probably have better things to do than sit around and post on CC.</p>