Are the EC's out of control?

College Majors Music Major
1

<p>This isn't necessarily an issue related to music, but that does happen to be my S's passion, so I thought I'd solicit some feedback here as I could use a new perspective. Oddly, my concern isn't that I think he has too many EC's. Rather, I have a frustration with the level of demand for "first priority" that I see in the adult leaders of my high school S's chosen activities. Music is and likely always will be his educational and vocational focus. He's a sophomore, a vocalist, and he hasn't quite worked out yet whether his direction in college will be classical voice performance or music theatre. He seems to be trending in the VP direction, but still really loves doing MT shows at school and hopes to take a music theatre class offered at his school for juniors and seniors (by audition). </p>

<p>What troubles me is he's a pretty well-rounded kid but the "system" seems to be rigged against such kids. He enjoys sports (particularly lacrosse) as well as music and academics. He is very active in an auditioned community choir which will be touring in Europe a few weeks this summer. He gave up wrestling a year ago because of its conflict with the choir. He managed to do the school musical last year and play JV lacrosse, but the schedule of the musical is later this year, so it conflicts directly with the first few weeks of lacrosse season. The musical's director has basically told him his chances of getting into her music theatre class in the future are slim if he doesn't do this year's show, while the lacrosse coach has told him it's unlikely he'll make varsity lacrosse or even get much playing time on JV, in spite of having been working out with the team religiously for months, and in spite of his skills being good enough, if he's not "fully committed" to lacrosse. And while he's auditioning for summer music programs, there is some risk he will be eliminated from the choir's tour of Europe if he attends one, because he won't be available enough for the choir's rehearsals in preparation for the trip.</p>

<p>I get that the directors, coaches, etc., who lead these activities all think theirs are the top priority. I also get that we all have to make choices, but isn't high school supposed to be when kids get a chance to try out a lot of different activities that they won't necessarily get to do later in life, but that will help them develop as a "whole person"? Aren't colleges, and in fact society, better served by having well-rounded adults instead of myopic drones?</p>

<p>It seems to me that we are imposing adult expectations of focus and commitment to a single goal on children at exactly the wrong time, and doing them and ourselves a disservice in the process. Or am I just being unreasonable?</p>

2

<p>I hear you … while my daughter played lacrosse for 2 years in HS, she quickly dropped it to make room for musicals and other music priorities by her Jr and Sr year. My son, who is a Jr and plays electric bass (for fun, not likely to go into music as a career), had to choose between Winter indoor lacrosse and jazz band. At first he chose lacrosse, but then on his own realized that the kids that were likely to make varsity this year as Jrs were already 100% dedicated to lacrosse, even through the summer. Since he isn’t willing to do that, he chose jazz band. I think sophopmore and junior year is the year for tough decisions. It’s just time to start prioritizing how you want to develop yourself. You have to pick one or two areas to develop deeply and fully, and fit everything else around that.</p>

3

<p>dobiemama,
Your requiem for the renaissance student brought back some not too distant memories. My S who is now a performance major was, to his father’s (my) delight, on two varsity teams as a freshman in HS. One fell to the side his sophmore year as a result of injury, and he had to abandon his second sport sport his senior year because of conflicts with his practice/audition schedule. Unfortunately, the well rounded students that colleges so desperately sought out when I was applying to school 200 years ago have been replaced by specialists, in the arts, in athletics and in the classroom. Perhaps the best evidence of this is found in the proliferation of magnet schools which steer kids into narrow bands of intellectual development. Where I live we have magnet schools for music, art, science, the classics, medical sciences, etc, etc, etc.</p>

<p>This hasn’t been a sudden development. I noticed this starting in the late eighties, early nineties while serving as a youth athletic coach. I started to lose athletes because they and their parents had decided that the kid, at a ridiculously young age, had to concentrate on one sport, year round. Once that attitude takes hold, it spreads like wild fire because it becomes an arms race. All things being equal, a kid who practices three months a year can’t compete with someone who practices year round. The message is clear: if you want to compete you must devote yourself to your endeavor exclusively. I suppose those magnet schools for the sciences will turn out kids who can split an atom at the age of 18, but I worry about a world filled with scientists who haven’t also read Huck Finn. I also worry about the kid who has not studied anything seriously but music, and suddenly wakes up and decides he or she is burned out or sick of it.</p>

<p>Like you, I don’t like it, but I don’t know how to fix it, and as long as specialization is so highly rewarded, I’m afraid it’s not likely to be fixed.</p>

4

<p>I’m gonna try my best to not be too long winded, but I have a lot to say on this topic. </p>

<p>First, make sure your son is involved in so much stuff because he wants to be. Then try as much as you can to make sure he’s not biting off more than he can chew (although that might have to be a lesson he learns for himself). </p>

<p>Second, there’s really no reason to focus on vocal music so early on. Unlike other instruments, the voice is going through major changes throughout the teen years. Many singers who started training classically at a young age regret it later on because they ultimately spend a lot of time UNlearning inaccurate technique due to a constantly changing physiology/anatomy. I think a “safe” age to really start focusing on voice is 18ish at the earliest. You could even stand to wait a little longer, because as you’ll hear over and over again on your road to being an opera professional, the voice isn’t fully mature until you’re in your 30s!. You have a LOT of time to work out your technique. Of course there are some who start their careers in their 20s, but their rare (a moot point since thriving opera careers are rare).</p>

<p>With that in mind, I’d advise your kid to maintain a “normal” education even through undergrad. Trust me. Even for a career in opera, a liberal arts (or whatever) degree is FAR more useful than a performance degree. In fact, performance degrees aren’t useful for anything. At all. Curtis is the ONLY school in the US where voice students actually perform enough to merit the word “performance” on their degrees and diplomas. And at Curtis, for a time, they advised us to drop bachelors since exactly 0% of auditions require you to have a degree.
A masters in vocal/opera performance is a little different, because at that age you should have your voice/technique together and, more importantly, you want to start becoming known by the powers that be. Still, there’s not much that the degree and music education offers that you couldn’t do on your own while studying something more secure and lucrative. And with a less terrible lifestyle (being an opera singer sucks for most people, EVEN IF YOU’RE SUCCESSFUL!). </p>

<p>Which brings me to my last point, which, I don’t want to discourage or crush dreams or anything, and I probably won’t because I know I heard this when I was 18 and just ignored it. </p>

<p>If there is ANYTHING! ANYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD that your kid feels like he could be REMOTELY happy doing, he should NOT PURSUE OPERA! For reasons beyond comprehension for outsiders, opera is an incredibly difficult career, and not because it’s competitive. For 999/1000 people, it’s not worth it.</p>

5

<p>I had a conversation about this just this morning with a parent whose kids are on an entirely different track from my own, but we both have been frustrated by these kinds of demands over the years. We ended with the story of a friend who had to resign from the Ultimate Frisbee Club Team at college because the frisbee practices were becoming too demanding on his schedule!!</p>

6

<p>We had a situation in which the theater director and chess club director at our high school were actually screaming at each other over who got our son’s participation on a certain day!</p>

<p>The level of involvement expected from kids for each and every activity seems much higher than in the past, and also at an earlier age. Athletics are very demanding, for one.</p>

<p>That said, I have seen all 3 of my kids naturally start to choose priorities, and eliminate others, during the last two years of high school. </p>

<p>Further broadening can happen at college, and if the kids want to narrow their focus more, they tend to apply to conservatories.</p>

<p>I think it all works out, generally. I would vote for everyone to have more down time, overall, which is a different issue!</p>

7

<p>Thanks all for your thoughts. I realize that much of my frustration is simply having to accept a new reality that didn’t exist when I was S’s age. Then again, he is more passionate about many things than I ever was about anything at all. Unfortunately for him, he at this stage cannot conceive of a living not made with his voice, and while I certainly recognize the realities there, I’m also committed to supporting his efforts in any way possible. For most people, the undergrad degree is pretty irrelevant–he can choose a graduate program in music, or business, or law or med school if he finds another career path that better suits him later (some with more additional preparation than others). What he won’t find is the ability to go back and just be a high school kid again.</p>

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<p>Just to put a little different perspective on OP’s initial comments, I have had kids like hers and DH is a coach who tries really hard to accommodate multi-faceted kids. However, it is not fair to the rest of the team, production, performing group, when everyone is scattered doing other things and you cannot get a solid group together to practice or rehearse. When game time or performance time comes, the group has not had sufficient time together to be successful. Then those who really wanted it are shortchanged for those for whom it is just one part of their life. Some are not going on to have opportunities later and for them this is it. So DH agonizes over trying to get the right balance between mandatory attendance and allowing kids to be kids. And S’s struggled with choices. It is really hard.</p>

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<p>Just one thing to add to the discussion – MAGNET schools :wink: Oh my! I am (perhaps erroneously) coming to the conclusion that magnet schools exist solely as a ‘stop gap’ to cover up the fact that we as a society (present company excepted, I am certain) are unwilling to fund the kind of holistic, well-rounded and rigorous education our children need. At least, that’s how it seems in my (urban) school district, where a dearth of funding (and common sense) has necessitated that they REMOVE music from the 5 comprehensive high schools and consolidate it into what amounts to a district wide after school program that conflicts with athletics. At the same time, you have to choose your high school based on whether or not you’re interested in the arts, college prep, health sciences, etc.</p>

<p>Now, as a kid, I was highly involved in a very professional/demanding drama club, and that DID require 4 nights a week, every week, all school year, for a series of performances that frankly paid for our football program :wink: (We had a beautiful proscenium state with a full pit and 1929 dance floor board with very nice tech capabilities – so we ran long runs of show for all the schools in the county plus the community, plus regional drama competitions). As a result, I was not in band, nor did I play sports (except intra-murally) and I struggled to find time for meetings when I edited the school newspaper. But I <em>could</em> have (and in some cases did) take those subjects during the school day – so my love of theater did not handicap me for my future degree in other areas of interest.</p>

<p>In our district today, it’s very tough for a kid to be in the “gifted” magnet school and still access core arts programs such as sequential Art, Design, Theatre Arts, Music Technology, etc. because those programs are at different “HUBS”. In other words, we can’t seem to fund the FULL MEAL DEAL. I realize this is not (yet) the case in every state or suburb, but predict this waning of arts education is endemic to a society that is comparatively (historically speaking) uneducated in the arts, unappreciative in the arts, and very narrowly focused as to what education does or should look like and very very concerned about who will pay for it.</p>

<p>So indeed, sometimes you just have to pick your spots. But I do think we build better humans when the full pallet of what I call “education” is actually available as part of the school day. My greatest concern is that it’s just not there for the choosing in every instance.</p>

10

<p>That is a most disturbing trend you describe, kmccrindle. In our case, S does attend a magnet school (for the arts), which he chose over a private high school. This school happens to occupy a building also housing a math & science charter school. Although the two run entirely separately, they’ve actually got a fairly interesting “flow” between the two schools that enables kids to take advantage of classes and activities offered by the other school. The math/science charter fields all the sports teams, while the band(s) belong to the arts school, but all of these activities include students from both schools. A student in either school may take a class at the other school if it is not offered in their school, so the arts kids get access to AP math and science courses not offered by the arts school, and the math/science kids may study piano or opera or other arts. And, while neither school’s class offerings are as extensive as I would like (no German or Italian foreign language in either school, for example, or AP music theory), I have to give them some credit for effort. In our area, public schools generally are not particularly strong, and I’m really unfamiliar with what others offer. There are many excellent privates, so if we want more of the “whole package” we’d have to pay for it, which is what we did with our S until high school.</p>

11

<p>Kid likes instrument and is good at it. Also likes sports. As in two varsity sports. Told college, on arts supplement, that he didn’t do youth orchestras or competitions because they interfered with sports. Decided early on to play recitals, practice, and let the rest ride. Does the school orchestra because it is an easy A without too much time outside class. Occasionally plays for a folk music group that does public gigs. Did a recording. We figure the college will be able to tell how well he plays from that.</p>