<p>Unlike when our offspring are truly children and under our direct control, once they grow up and hit legal age, we can not stop our kids from making big mistakes.</p>
<p>We can cut off monetary support. We can give them advice, but we can not run their lives for them -- no matter how much we love them and want them to avoid mistakes that we can see them running to.</p>
<p>Sometimes all we can do is grit our teeth and keep the lines of communication open so they will turn to us -- not drugs, booze or dysfunctional friends-- for advice after they fall.</p>