Are you able to go wherever you want?

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

<p>Parent A: "You can go wherever you get accepted to, and we'll find a way to pay for it."</p>

<p>Parent B: "We're spending this much. Work as hard as you can to get into the best school for this amount of money."</p>

<p>Parent C: "We'll spend x amount of money (very little). Basically, you either have to go to a community college or a local state school and live at home. Give up your dreams, and don't bother working really hard in high school because you won't be going to a highly expensive/selective school anyway."</p>

<p>Which parent do you have?</p>

<p>I have C, unfortunately. I wouldn't say they speak exactly like that, but their price range is highly limiting my choice of colleges and I hate it. It gets discouraging at times and makes you wonder if all the work you put into high school will even be worth it because you might just end up at a school with a ridiculously high acceptance rate and living in the same city that you've hated your entire life... end rant.</p>

<p>I'm curious to see what it's like for you guys. Is price a deciding factor in your college choice, or are you just working hard to get into the best school you can and your parents will handle the money side of it?</p>

2

<p>I also have parent C, but it’s not very little. I get $100k after high school to spend on what I please, and my parents make too much for me to get FA anywhere (250k+), so i’m just trying to get merit scholarships/full tuition at the best schools I can, and I would recommend you do the same.</p>

3

<p>I have Parent D: “Your desired major is a waste of your time and my money. It’s unlikely you have the talent, skills, and stats to get into the programs you want. Start at a community college, rethink your life, and maybe later we’ll talk about this.”</p>

4

<p>Parent E: Never discusses price… Because Parent E has already drilled it into you that Parent E is broke beyond explanation. </p>

<p>That being said, Parent E makes ~$2,000 too much to qualify for the no-loan policy at Emory. :frowning: My grandfather’s helping me pay for college (at least that’s what he promised my mother… But she’s dead, so I’m hoping he still keeps his promise), but I’m still looking almost exclusively at in-state publics and schools that meet full need.</p>

5

<p>I have parent A.</p>

6

<p>Well, my parents make about $35,000 a year so I guess they’re figuring that I’ll get pretty good financial aid or rack up some scholarships.</p>

7

<p>Parent A, unless the school feels “too politically correct” for them, which so far is only Stanford (but somehow not Berkeley…).
I’m just thankful they’re letting me out of here (Georgia)!</p>

8

<p>I am about 20 miles from a good midsized private university with a good premed program. My parents aren’t limiting price wise but just want me to commute to save money. It would be nearly $40,000 just in housing rates over 4 years. So I get their point. And I have a good chance of replacing my old beater with a new car :slight_smile: so I’m pretty content. It depends on perspective. Could I get into somewhere really nice? Sure. I can understand why you’re frustrated, because I felt like sometimes working so hard wasnt even worth it knowing my limited choice. I don’t understand why you say it’s limiting your dreams. If you’re on CC, I’m assuming you’re a hard worker with ambitions that shouldn’t be squashed because of this. :confused: try to find a bright side to this! And apply to a bunch of places besides that one school. You could get plenty in scholarships to prestigious schools that may sway their decisions… :)</p>

9

<p>I’m going to have to rely almost entirely on financial aid/scholarships because my parents make about 25K a year. I know my family will help as much as they can because I’m the only one in this “generation” (out of my siblings, cousins, etc.) who’s planning on going to college, but realistically, I’m pretty much on my own. I’m pretty much stuck with in-state public colleges; not that I really mind, though. :D</p>

10

<p>Something like parent B. We’ll get a reasonable amount of aid in most places, though, so if I take that into account I have a good range of schools that we can afford. Plus my parents always tell me that if I do get into a dream school they will find some way to pay for it. Only places like Harvard qualify for this, haha, but it’s fair.</p>

11

<p>@twentythirteen It’s not so much that they’re limiting my dreams, I’ve just always wanted to go to college out of state and experience a different area of the country, or at least live away from home but still in-state. I live in California, so even our in-state schools (UCs & CSUs) are expensive when including tuition and room & board. All the UCs are around 32K and the one CSU I’m totally content with going to, Cal Poly SLO, is about 19K. I’m hoping I’m going to be able to get the loans, because if not, I’m screwed. My parents don’t make that much but they make too much for me to qualify for financial aid and I doubt I’ll get a lot of scholarship money, if any, unless I apply to some small private school which I’m not really planning on.</p>

12

<p>I have C, kinda. They have some money saved up but I assume they think i’ll get a scholarship or something. But i won’t let it stand in the way of my dreams. Debt is a subjective fear</p>

13

<p>I have type C without the added “give up your dreams” part. My parents do not have any money. That is the main reason I endeavored to matriculate at a school with excellent financial aid.</p>

14

<p>Parent A, and I’m so grateful. They’re expecting good financial aid (which is why I’m applying to schools that give it) but if I don’t get accepted, in-state will work, and we’ll actually be gaining money (or so I’ve heard).</p>

15

<p>Eh…I guess a mix between A and B. My mom said she is willing to pay X amount which counts for public schools so if I go to a public school it’ll basically be free, but if I go to a private school I will have to come up with the difference.</p>

16

<p>Sorry to intrude on HSL, but I hope my experience helps. I had parent F. Pay for it yourself, but we don’t want you to go to that school that offered you a full ride because it is against our principles. The lesson I learned is be resilient and do the best with whatever parent you happen to have.</p>

17

<p>I have Parent A…</p>

18

<p>I have parent A. They will break down the doors of the financial aid office and call it home.</p>

19

<p>I’m sorry that your choices are limited, and understand that it’s hard not to be able to go where you want. However, you mentioned that all your work in high school would be wasted if you don’t go to a college of a certain selectivity. While it’s true that more selective colleges give you more opportunities, you should definitely not think of all your high school work as wasted. In fact, if you did it just to get into a certain type of college, that would almost be more of a waste.</p>

<p>There seems to be a very common idea on this site that you work hard in high school just to get into college X, and then if you’re accepted, your life is complete and you can sit back and watch success be handed to you on a silver platter. I was sort of under this impression myself, before I actually got to college. The college you attend does make a difference, but not nearly as much as many people on this site think. I’m not sure I would go quite this far, but annasdad often mentions on these forums that a Harvard education is no better than an education at most good state schools–when you control for the type of student entering, the success after college has little correlation with the college attended. What matters most is what you make of your college education. Sure it’s easier to find opportunities and a selective college, but there are benefits to a less-selective college too. Most of the time you won’t be working as hard, which gives you more time to try other things, and it’s easier to impress your professors and get personal attention.</p>

<p>I understand that it’s frustrating that your parents don’t want to pay for one of your dreams, but it is their money, and I suspect many if not most parents in the world wouldn’t pay a lot to send their child to a selective college. I wouldn’t blame them, and again, I definitely wouldn’t say that having a limited selection of colleges means you should forget working hard in high school–if anything, you should work harder to set yourself up to do as well or better than students in very selective colleges.</p>

<p>This should be encouraging–the college you attend is just one factor in your career, and even if you don’t go to a super-selective top-notch college, you’re not going to be set back. It’s more important to have a good work-ethic, a positive attitude, and determination. If you have these, you’ll probably outperform a significant fraction of the students attending top schools, who I suspect tend to have an attitude of entitlement and think that their college alone will set them up for success, and will then find out that it doesn’t work that way.</p>

<p>My parents were relatively low-income, so the colleges I was accepted at basically paid most of my tuition. The whole financial aid system seems a little unfair to the mid-to-upper income families: they usually have to pay the full freight, and often can’t afford to do so.</p>

20

<p>I have a mix between B and C. I live with just my mom, and she never went to college, so I’ve really had to do all the research on my own. For some reason she can’t comprehend that schools that are more selective generally have more generous financial aid. All she understands is that going to an in-state school would be free. I’ve come to the point where I really don’t even talk to her about college anymore, and she won’t ask. </p>

<p>I’m just going to apply to places I want, and let the acceptances and financial aid offers limit my decisions. I know my mom won’t be able to pay any money for college, so my list consists of in-state schools and then selective colleges that would pay for most of the costs. </p>

<p>I just really really don’t want to go to the in-state college. I go to a school that has a 100% matriculation rate to a 4-year university. Out of this past years graduating class, I’d say nearly 60% went to Indiana University, while another 30% went to either Purdue or another in-state school. I don’t think I’d very happy if I went to the same college as all the other slackers in my class, and there’s no real way of getting around that.</p>