<p>Pardon me for asking, but are you going to your student's college orientation?</p>
<p>I'm nervous about this. I am going but only because my husband is going. And I don't understand WHY he is going. I feel it is the student's college and the student's life and his responsibility, not mine or my husband.I feel like I'm intruding.
We ARE invited and they are having a barbeque for the families. That's all very nice.It's very nice of the college to do this for us.</p>
<p>If families are invited then they should go if they want to. My kids didn't mind that we went, and as far as we could see, the vast majority had family members tagging along.</p>
<p>We are going - there's a one week freshman orientation and the first day is specifically for families. They even schedule a couple of hours for the students to have a last dinner with their families. Then at 8:00 pm it's goodbye til Parent Weekend. And yes, I'm going to that too, although I'm not sure if DH will be along.</p>
<p>Went to all of my kids' orientations and was glad that I did. Three different schools, so three different experiences--but each had something for parents and at all I learned information that I wouldn't have otherwise. Also gave the opportunity to meet some very nice parents from across the US--some of whom I have stayed in touch with. Wake had a day and a half with just parent activities-- dinner, Q&A sessions with student health, counseling, learning center, dept. heads, etc. Also had freshman convocation which was very nice.
Other two schools had very similar programs, though not quite as in depth.</p>
<p>We went to first son's orientation, because it was just before school started, and we were driving him there. Did not go to second son's, because it was in the middle of summer, and it was too far to drive. We did all (dh, son, and I) fly there to take him for the start of school, but did not attend any orientation events, as son was not interested, and they were meant for families together. I wouldn't have minded attending orientation, had it been closer.</p>
<p>Our son is a dual major in a large business program and a small honors program so I have a big and small program perspective of orientation activities. Like Marilyn, our son's college had special activities and meetings for parents on the first day. Some of the events were purely social and, while fun, could be skipped. Other events were helpful and instructive meetings on topics like health services and financial matters - topics that our son didn't pay much attention to and was later grateful for our knowledge on these subjects.</p>
<p>For us, the primary benefit of orientation was the insight we gained into our son's academic majors. The departments where our son was enrolled - business and liberal arts - held meetings with the parents to discuss specific topics about their curriculum, etc. Attendance at the business meeting was large but the presentation was thorough and informative. The liberal arts honors meeting was small, only around 30 people, and informal. There was time for questions and getting to know the dean and his assistants. </p>
<p>I'm not sure what orientation activities they plan at your student's college. You might check online to see if there is a schedule of parents' activities but if they invited the parents, I say go.</p>
<p>I'm not going to my daughter's orientation, but I did go to my son's 5 years ago. No big deal - it was a small LAC and they had special events planned for parents, and of course I got to meet some people like the college President & the Dean of Students -- nice to put a face to the names. At a larger college the Orientation would probably be less personal. </p>
<p>My daughter doesn't want me coming to her Orientation and it would be unduly expensive for me to fly out with her, but I really don't want to go in any case -- it seems boring. What are they going to tell me that I don't already know from reading about the college? At my son's orientation the Deans talked to the parents about all letting go and some of the typical ups and downs that freshman have.... well, now I know that already, I don't need to hear it again. </p>
<p>But parents are very welcome at these things, so I think a parent who WANTS to go should go -- I think for some people it helps to have a mental picture of where their kid is going to be sleeping, what the kids and their parents look like. For me it was important the first time around, but no longer seems to matter -- I just don't think I would have much fun at her orientation. Heck -- even SHE was bored at the on campus new-student event she attended in April, where a lot of stuff was just a rehash of the tour & info session she had attended the previous fall.</p>
<p>It's fun to go! You'll learn a lot - there will be lots of info sessions for parents. It's also fun to visit with the parents of your kids' new classmates. Take some time to tour the town and eat out someplace nice. Do it!</p>
<p>Ah.........I see. Well, thanks. I did not go to other son's orientation but Hus. did. We just could not fit everything and two extra bodies in the car. I specifically remember I did not attend daughter's, and I don't think they really included the parents. </p>
<p>Thank you for the input!</p>
<p>BHG, honestly it is fun to go. Yeah, a lot of the organized activites are a combo of useless talks for the nervous Nellies and thinly disguised efforts at fund-raising, but it is very helpful to see the child's room, meet the friends and roommate - however awkward and unrealistic that meeting might be, see where the health service is, where security is, learn a bit about the services available for the kid.</p>
<p>Things have changed, once that kid turns 18, you get very little input that the child doesn't allow you. Depending on the given Dean, you could find yourself in a nightmare situation where your child is mentally ill, endangering themselves, and you get no info or input. Granted, I'm being scary now with the absolute worst case scenario, but it is very realistic that your child will call you with a problem asking for advice, and it is a great feeling to be able to steer them in the direction of campus resources that will help them deal with the problem themselves - the what to do when sexiled or when you have a truly nasty cold, etc. It is weird now with the privacy laws - my parents could turn me loose to go to college, because they knew that if I got into real trouble they could "hear" it on the phone, or they would get a call from the school's admin - no more, you may or may not get any info.</p>
<p>Are there situations when you shouldn't go - sure there are, some goods ones are in the posts above. I think parents at orientation is a little overkill when a student is commuting, or even a short drive from home as well - when your radar goes up, you can intervene as necessary. I think frosh orientation is analogous to this situation - let's say your kid is at Big State U, and he announces he is moving out of the dorm to live in an apartment with 4 of his buddies - my Mom's antennae would go straight up, and I'd at least want to see the apartment (or trailer in our typical case) and be sure it had electricity, running water and only pet rats (notice that furniture and food is optional). Going away to college now has some of the same "letting go" aspects that moving in an apartment had when I was college age in the late 70s.</p>
<p>I might have liked to have gone to orientation with my son... he's going to GW, and they hold their orientations during 5 sessions throughout June & July... he goes next Friday. It would be different if orientation was attached to move-in day, as many schools do. But he was adament that we not go -- he insisted he was 18 years old, and if he could go to college on his own, he could certainly go to orientation on his own. So he's flying down next Friday morning. At least he's letting me take him to the airport! Besides, my husband can't take off from work, and it would mean finding "teen care" for my other son (at 15 I still won't leave him to his own devices all day unsupervised.). </p>
<p>That said, I still worry if he will bring home all the information he needs -- or -- should I say, that I need. Stuff about finances, food, dorm needs, etc. </p>
<p>He's been away every summer since he was 10 -- and he's travelled all over with his youth group -- he's very accustommed to being away, and I've got no problem letting go -- I definitely don't need the info sessions on separation, and independence. </p>
<p>I suppose I should be impressed I've raised an independent kid!</p>
<p>We were not able to go to my daughters orientation and I think that was one reason it was hard for me to get adjusted to her being gone. I had no faces to put to any names - I didn't know what her room or roommates looked like and I didn't know any of the other parents. She flew out to college alone. </p>
<p>I am looking forward to our son's orientation in August. I agree with others that as long as it's connected to the move-in that it's worth doing. I would probably not go if it was a seperate time since both of our kids go to college out of state.</p>
<p>NYMom, that is one of the good reasons not to go - kid is adamant about you not going. Doesn't mean you can't collect some of the safety info on your own off the college's website, put it away in a file and don't use it unless the situation arises. Ask him (if you are paying) to produce all the financial documents when he returns. Also ask about the privacy waiver for grades if that is important to you. At the unis here, they have rolling summer orientation, too, and sigining the waiver is one of the things that most parents remember. This early if he forgets any forms or financial "stuff", you'll be able to retrieve it from the school easily enough.</p>
<p>He sounds like a very independent kid, which is great. Mine is too, she had travelled quite a bit before going to college, but she needed someone to schlep her stuff, drive to Walmart, open a bank account, etc during move-in. That's another point - if your child is under 18, they may not be able to open their own bank account.</p>
<p>Cangel,
Easy to open a joint account at a large bank that is local, and has a branch by the college.</p>
<p>There may be a difference between SO and something RPI calls F(irst)Y(ear)E(xperience). SO was in July and attended to practical matters like meeting with your advisor, scheduling first semester classes, learning the college computer network, library orientation, etc. While they did spend the nite in the dorm, eat in the DH and had some evening activities. Our son went to his SO on his own. The FYE was longer(3 or 4 days), included off campus events like a Habitat for Humanity project, wilderness adventure program, parent activities and freshman move-in. I think attending this FYE program with our son was a great idea. We got to meet a few dorm mates, the RA, do a few practical things like setting up a checking account, and even tagged along to buy the first semester books. He needed some help writing that first check.</p>
<p>We found it to be a good transitioning period and felt better knowing that he seemed to be getting on fine when we left. And I think the same could be said for our son too.</p>
<p>My son's Orientation was 5/20 in HI. Most kids had at least one parent along & some had two & some even had a sib as well. I went with son & was glad I did. Was able to open a joint USC Credit Union account with son at the time, which will be helpful for us. Also was able to speak with the Dean of Engineering again, as well as several other administrators. Was able to clarify financial issues, including how much merit money the school awarded son (which until that point had been unclear). Spent time with the dad of an incoming freshman, comparing notes about settling the kids at USC.
Son was able to register & get the classes he wanted, as well as one-on-one advising in engineering. He found the team spirit aspect of the event a bit much, but was glad he was able to register.
Hubby had considered coming as well, but since it was $80/person decided his presence was NOT needed. We were all still glad that I attended with son & was able to clarify issues with the school.
If it had meant buying two round trip plane tickets instead of one, it would have given more more pause about attending, but since it was in our hometown (at our S's HS), it seemed reasonable enough to just pay the extra $80 & attend with S, to meet & speak with the administrators & other parents & open the joint account (would have had to drive S anyway).</p>
<p>
[quote]
Cangel,
Easy to open a joint account at a large bank that is local, and has a branch by the college.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Aaahh, not easy, in fact, impossible. There is no such bank. we hope that perhaps, by the time she graduates that could be possible, but not now. BofA does have a branch in a town 60 miles away that is in another state, but there are no truly national banks in our city. we could have done internet, but it works fine for her to have 2 joint accounts - one at the local bank her at home, one in Hanover. She keeps a small balance in Hanover, doing a transfer at the beginning of the quarter for books and everyday expenses. She deposited earnings into the local account, and we added small amounts including her tax refunds.</p>
<p>Bless you, parents who are abstaining from orientation. The first few posts had me feeling very guillty. D will fly by herself almost cross-country to her orientation in July. Husband and I didn't go in part because we were miffed by the $100 per guest fee, we thought it was cheeky of this private university to tack it on in view of the already-high price tag. (Maybe it's our public school background talking.) On the other hand, D is unusually self-reliant and would hate for us to go with her; she only reluctantly "allowed" us to accompany her to move-in day over Labor Day weekend.</p>
<p>Katliamom... is your daughter going to GW? sounds like the setup for our son who is going there. Orientation in July, move in on Labor day, $100 fee.</p>
<p>For everyone else --
As for the banking stuff.... I figured out at Wachovia is the only bank common to DC & our town.... so I went online, as my son, with his Social # & Driver ID, and opened an account for him . They call it a student account, no fees... he'll get a debit card & checking account. It was SO EASY. There is a branch about 2 blocks from the GW campus, so easy for him to walk to the cash machine.</p>
<p>I feel a little better about not going with him, after reading all these posts. I agree, that if it were during move in time, we'd definitely participate. But its not, and I need to get past that.</p>
<p>Thanks for the heads up on grade release. I hadn't heard anything about that. I'll have to look into it. And he has to get some LD waivers & letters signed.... so I'll need to look into that also next week. Right now, I'm trying to deal with graduation stuff for him. He's already at his sleepaway camp counselor job (driving home tomorrow night for graduation).... so I'm off to pick up his cap & gown at school for him.... the fun never ends.... and WHEN exactly is it that he'll be independent????</p>
<p>Wachovia is in lots of locations in the District. In fact, it was nearby every campus we visited in NC, SC, VA.</p>