Are you in a relationship? Has applying changed things?

<p>I know this is a bit random but I was just wondering if anyone is in a relationship right now and how the application/transferring process has affected it, if at all. Is your bf/gf applying as well or are they staying at a community college? Is it stressful? Or are they understanding? Do they even go to a cc? Very curious...</p>

<p>She said that we she would break up with me if I went to any UC other than LA which is where we live. She said it in a joking manner but I’m pretty sure that’s what would happen. UCLA is my top choice and I’d probably just spend another year at CC if I wasn’t accepted. She still has 2 years left at CC so I don’t think much will change.</p>

<p>if someone is willing to breakup with you over doing something like going to a UC. you shouldn’t be with them in the first place.</p>

<p>Cbaker, that’s not really fair. Depending on where you transfer to, it might end up being a long distance relationship and we all know how those usually turn out. Some people might be up for those, many won’t.</p>

<p>RamonaFalls My boyfriend did the same thing. And it’s the same setup as well. UCLA is at the top of the list but I can tell he’s freaking out about me “leaving”. How long have you guys been together?</p>

<p>It’s totally fair, why put someone through a long distance relationship when you know you will be moving? If you KNOW that you will be leaving somewhere within a certain amount of time, be good friends/lovers but don’t get too serious. </p>

<p>Makes things easier in the long run. Saves you both the stress/heartache of any potential long distance issues. You definitely don’t need that during your transition.</p>

<p>It’s a fair question…I applied to 4 UC’s, 2 CSU’s and two OOS schools.</p>

<p>I’m rly only considering the UC’s unless for some crazy reason the OOS schools in NY throw some crazy scholarship at me.</p>

<p>That being said yeah I’m in a committed relationship. But I had goals before going into my relationship and my gf knows that. As far as transferring I think I’ll go to the UC that offers me the most money so that I can finish with the least amount of debt possible. My gf is a CCC student she did not apply for any 4 year schools even though I strongly urged her to. She said she would move wherever I decide to go and take 2 semesters of CCC nearby (I.e. I go to UCSB and she will go to SBCC) we still haven’t figured out if we’ll live together or nearby or everything. </p>

<p>Most of that will all be figured out when they send out acceptances and rejections and as time goes on.</p>

<p>Hi Flowerchild 747:</p>

<p>I’m definitely an older person (George Bush, Sr. was in office when I graduated HS). But, I returned to a CC in 2005. During that time, I met a woman who I fell in love with. I made stellar grades upon returning to school (3.9) and was accepted, as a transfer, to multiple UCs (Cal, UCLA, Davis, UCSC), 4 Ivies, and some OOS, East Coast, privates. I chose Cal because it had one of the best departments in the country/world for my major focus (British history) AND because I wouldn’t have to leave the woman who I eventually came to marry soon after graduation.</p>

<p>In my experience, long distance relationships almost never work (NOTE: there ARE exceptions to the rule, or so I’ve heard…, but I’ve never seen one, personally). I made my choice after having lived through a few long-distance relationships myself (3000 miles distant). But I knew that she was the one for me… the one who would stick it out through the hard times. I’m currently in a graduate program and we now have a 16-month old son.</p>

<p>Here’s my advice for what it’s worth: Think about what your relationship offers you. If your partner is already telling you that he/she will break up with you if you choose to leave your area in order to get the best education that you can… that is your answer as to whether a long-distance relationship would work with them. But, if you determine, on your own, that being with them offers you a chance at something special and you can’t imagine not having them in your life… and this outweighs your desire to go to the school of your dreams… then, by all means, stay close to home.</p>

<p>+1 to Calbears response.</p>

<p>The glass is half full :)</p>

<p>+1 Great advice for Calbears.</p>

<p>In top of that, I always believe that if you guys are meant to be, then a long distance relationship will eventually work out. A strong healthy couple look to compromise and encourage each other to follow suits to their career and their dreams.</p>

<p>I really appreciate all your answers!</p>

<p>I was in a relationship with someone during my first two (out of three) years in CC. He did not have UC-level grades. To my parents’ dismay, I thought we could try to meet half way–he would raise his grades as much as possible and we could go to UCSC (even though Berkeley and UCLA were my dream schools).</p>

<p>When we broke up, I realized him leaving was the best thing that’s ever happened to me and that I’d rather be single and let life take me to the best universities and career opportunities I can get to. The rest of CC I dated someone else far more casually, and after transferring to Cal fall '12, I’ve been single, happy, and focused. For me, learning to put myself first and relationships second was totally worth it, even if it meant not getting that close to people. Relationships can wait. Going to my dream school couldn’t.</p>

<p>It all depends on the situation, of course, but that was my experience.</p>