<p>teachandmom,
It might come to you as a shock, but you CAN send your 21 year old to Europe and expect his college to be covered by the government there. Education is still free or nearly free for everybody(that includes foreigners) in quite a few European countries. Germany, Finland, Czech Republic, and some others. Some even have grants to cover living costs for exceptional international students.
I do agree though that OP needs to abide by the rules in the US.</p>