My kid’s freshman dorm roommate, who seemed sullen and silent on movein day, was found to have a small and a large knife in the room and was self-harming. The roommate received an emergency suspension and there is to be a school hearing on whether the student can return after treatment. Are my kid and the other roommate who discovered the weapons at risk from the roommate returning, unauthorized, and retaliating against them? Who should I contact in the administration to discuss this? (My student told me about the incident.) Do privacy laws affect this? I don’t want to detract from my student’s feeling of maturity for handling the situation wisely and swiftly – on the other hand, I don’t want to ignore possible ongoing risk. What would you do in my place? It is not the self-harming that worries me but that the roommate had the large weapon. Advice?
Without knowing the details, if the student was cutting, they are unlikely to be a threat to your child or the other roommate. If they are a cutter, then they may be engaging in nonsuicidal self-injury, or they may be suicidal. If the knives are there for reasons other than self-injury then it is concerning that the roommate had weapons and I would hope that the school will do something to prohibit their return.
Most schools I’m familiar issue parent resource guides of some sort that would help point you in the right direction for escalating a problem. And there should certainly be something like that for your student. Have them look it up if you can’t find anything. But they could start with their hall/dorm advisor and/or Security.
I would make sure that when the roommate returns to school, if, that he no longer rooms with your child.
Is there a policy against weapons on campus or in the dorms that would cover the large knife? If so, I’d contact Res Life and express your concern about having them room with your student or any other student.