Our high school meet with all the parents at the start of Spring semester their Jr year. They gave us information regarding the college process and advised us to pay attention to deadlines. We had another meeting at the start of their Sr year regarding the college process. The district had college nights all college visits were excused absences. The counselor meet with the kids a few times a semester. I thought they did a good job of setting the parameters but the actual footwork was the job of the the parents.
I think the most jarring experience for me so far happened recently at our back to school night. We follow our kids class schedule and started the night off in homeroom/advisory. My son’s homeroom teacher happens to be the schools former academic advisor and current interem head of school (long story).
She asked for any ideas for junior fieldtrips and I suggested the local college tour that a friends son took at another local private school (the day trip to W&M and CNU). Her response was that that idea was walking a fine line between fear and motivation. Another parent spoke up and said that fear was sometimes a motivator and she said that was true but that fear was also paralyzing for some kids and they didn’t want the college search to make these kids afraid.
I was rendered speechless. ‘These kids’ are 11th graders, not 8th graders!! Her response summed up for me what we can expect this year which isn’t much. Such a shame.
D goes to an urban public high school with about 3,000 students. She’s a freshman, and preliminary discussions have already begun. A college timeline was given to students as well as parents during freshman orientation. The school website has a list of college visits, scholarship opportunities, test dates, etc. that is updated daily. Parents of first-time college students have various meetings throughout the year to discuss whatever it is they discuss (we don’t qualify for that). A district-wide college fair is being held early next month, and all freshmen are encouraged to attend. In addition, several colleges visit the school throughout the school year, and students are excused to visit them. Students are encouraged to wear college tees and sweatshirts. With so many students in each class, I’m not expecting arranged college tours - I can just imagine that nightmare for chaperones.
Honestly, if parents can get away from work and afford to go, it’s better to tour with your kid. In a school group they may be rather distracted by or overly influenced by their friends. Parents can look out for some of the things kids may not notice or think to ask about.
We took my older daughter with friends to go see two schools during an open house weekend which made for 2 mistakes for us. She was definitely influenced by her friends opinions (which were not so positive) and the open house concept had no opportunities for personalization. She was just one of thousands of kids walking around. When we toured with her during her spring break (which bc she goes to private school was a month earlier than public school break) and it was just her, my husband and I, and groups of 8 - 15 kids for each of the 4 schools we toured. It was a better experience in every way.
@VaNcBorder - in what way do you think your son’s school (or your son) is behind?
It seems to me that the agenda for 99% of kids should be:
Spring of junior year:
- take at least one SAT or ACT
- go on a college trip and visit some schools
Summer before senior year:
- make the list of schools to apply to
- (optional) think about / work on essay(s)
Fall of senior year:
- (optional) visit some more colleges
- (probably) retake your standardized test
- finalize list
- apply
After acceptances:
- Do accepted students’ days at schools if a choice exists.
At our school there are 3 counselors for the entire 9-12. 6 AP classes are offered and 59% of the kids participate. But APs are not the only classes offered marked ‘most difficult.’ 85% test ready for college but well over 90% go on to either junior college or 4year colleges on average. Last year the ACT was the required test (for the state) so everyone took it and the average across that entire junior class was 28. I think the school does a pretty good job of “educating” parents and students about college given the variety of college bound students in a small but rigorous public high school that is highly ranked in the state.
Sophomore year parent meeting going over financial info, GPA requirements for popular colleges/unis, sports scholarships and requirements, curriculum requirements for college bound students, required testing etc.
Junior year student meeting re: required testing, scholarships, general college info, PSAT, PLAN results from sophomore year
Senior fall early individual meetings with students and their GC to go over the “list” and review state requirements as far as classes to make sure everyone has everything done. The GCs take no meetings with freshmen, sophs or juniors in September…they try to get through all the seniors by the end of the month.
In my case we did our “trips” divided into two - one trip spring of junior year and the ‘final’ list fall of senior year. The summer between junior and senior year was spent culling the lists down from 15-18 for each kid to under 5-10 for applications.
My kids go/went to different college-preparatory private HSs. At their schools, the college counsellors don’t get involved much beyond scheduling standardized testing dates, until spring of junior year. That’s when the counsellors are done with the college admissions cycle of the senior class.
From my sample set of 2, I would expect more or less the same attention cycle by counsellors at other HSs.
Wow, you guys are lucky. I pretty much had to figure out all of this college stuff on my own with the help of this website and a few teachers. When did my counselors start to help, you ask? The answer is, they haven’t.
Even entering my senior year, if anyone asks my school counselors about college or help (even with classes-- asking to switch out or into a class), they act like you’ve done them an inconvenience or that they’re really busy and basically can only help you minimally.
This is unfortunate, of course, but at least I’ve learned how to do all of this college stuff. In fact, today I submitted my first application.
There is low-level college counseling in fall of junior year (information about the PSAT and its significance), taking the PSAT, and encouragement to attend local college fairs and events, etc. In January, the tempo steps up with student and parent questionnaires that provide the basis for a preliminary list of colleges, partly generated by the GC and partly by the family. The GCs schedule weekly presentations about aspects of the application process - everything from “demonstrated interest” to the FAFSA and calculating your EFC. By the beginning of the fall semester, a draft of the common app essay is due, as well as requests for LORs, and a finalized college application list including all deadlines (which can be tweaked if necessary) by the end of September. At least one standardized test by the end of junior year, with a second attempt in the fall, if necessary. For those taking SAT II tests, they are advised to get them done by June of junior year.
Rural HS, about 1000 kids in HS, 3 counselors total. The first time any one at school brought up college planning was at the FAFSA-fill out session in January of my D’s senior year. So basically, they do almost nothing. The presumption is that the tippy-top kids will aim for the flagship (most do), and the others will go to 2-year schools or regional colleges.
Motivated parents and students can talk among themselves and meet with the counselors one-on-one.
My school counselors did nothing more than make schedule changes for students. They had know clue about anything other than our local community college. Said they had never had a student take the SAT and that I should be shooting for a 20 on the ACT. I was like you got to be 5hitting me and said as much during an assembly. That was not a popular comment, I was promptly sent to the office for being disruptive.
I actually had to write the school student profile for them to submit with my apps because they had never seen one before. Clearly it was not a college prep school, I was generally disgusted with their lack of knowledge or assistance.
I am very appreciative of our college counselors and after reading some of the posts, we are truly blessed. Son goes to a small private college prep school. There are 3 counselors for a class of 100 seniors. 100% go to 4 year schools and all students are accepted to highly selective schools. Accepted but don’t necessarily attend. They do a fantastic job of instilling the importance of finding the right fit. College Counseling starts the 3rd week of Junior year. Students are required to meet with their college counselor and if they don’t schedule to meet with the college counselor, the counselor goes looking for them. They provide updates on what they’ve accomplished, what students should currently be working on and timeline for future tasks. The guidance the parents have been given is to back off and limit college discussions to once a week so that the kids don’t feel like it’s coming from both sides. Parents are welcomed to have in-person or telephonic meetings with the counselor and/ or family meetings.
The college counselor has spent enough time with my son over the last 13 months that I feel confident that she is capable of writing an excellent school recommendation about my son. She has shared with us items she intends to highlight. Each students school recommendation letter will be personalized with specifics and examples about each student, as it should be.
I have spent a significant amount of time since spring of Sophomore year researching and visiting schools with my son as I am not the type to leave my son’s future in someone else’s hands but I have been very impressed with their input and how the process they have established.
Edited to add that I graduated from a HS of 1000 seniors. Never met my college counselor even though I was in the top 10% of the class. That was a very long time ago back when we used typewriters to complete our apps.
My son and daughter went to a very good public school. Our son, who went to a liberal arts college, had a lot of help putting together his list. I was very “hands off” - Our daughter’s experience was very different. She aspired to a design school, had absolutely no help - her guidance teacher required a signed note from us giving her permission to drop foreign language her senior year so that she could take another art class. Even her art teachers were not much help with match schools. They only knew about a few, and recommended them. One kept pushing his alma mater, consistently recommending it as “the best art school.” They had not even heard about the one she eventually attended, even though it is nationally ranked. I did most research myself, as my daughter was feeling overwhelmed by the lack of information available through the “school channel”. The College Board site was also NO help for her. We found a few art schools which would have been a good “fit”, but it was only due to perseverance on my part. She is happy at the school that she is attending, and we are paying substantially less than we would have at the college that her art teacher kept pushing.
I’ve come to the conclusion that leaving the college guidance decision to up to guidance counselors (only) is like leaving where you want to live for the next 10 years up to your realtor. They might know a lot, but you are the one who will need to live there, so it is important to research as much as you are able. You also need to know what you need in a home, versus your “wishes” - you also need to know as many statistics about the area that are relevant to you.
I had a realtor who was dismissing a neighborhood because even though she had never been in one, she thought that the houses were “too small inside” and refused to show us one until I insisted. It was the right price, the right location, and the right school. We put an offer down that day. While a tad smaller than what she had been showing us, it ended up being a great “fit” for us, and she apologized.
Since you already have a private college Counselor, you don’t really need to involve your school until September senior year. Let the school get this year’s seniors sorted out first!
I consider this a student’s job, with parental input, as desired. I would never leave something important to the school.
A couple of years ago a friend’s daughter was accepted to Middlebury. This girl told me that when she informed her Guidance Counselor, the GC’s response was “Oh, is that a community college?”
We don’t live in New England, but not so far from the region, either. Although this girl went to the neighboring public high school, not the one our daughter will attend, I don’t think I will rely too strongly on the school for information! I have noticed that most school teachers/staff in our area attended the local regional university or a tiny scattering of other schools within a 90-minute drive.
My kids go to a public HS with 1700 kids. Each GC is responsible for about 300 kids. So not very much help. We did meet with the GC at the end of junior year one time with our child. We also filled out the brag sheets to help the GC write their letters of recommendation. My son also had 3 different GC throughout HS. You can see why a brag sheet is necessary.
I think you need a very self motivated kid to manage the insanity of applications, testing, sending scores and school visits. I was happy to help my kid come up with reasonable list of schools. His guidance counselor made a couple of recommendations but chose schools without engineering programs which was his intended major. Don’t rely on their help.
I just want to point out there is a Middlebury CC in VT.
http://ccv.edu/location/ccv-middlebury/
I’m sure that doesn’t match up with the student’s record, but…
Thanks, Erin’s Dad, it’s good to know…but from our geographic location (Central Appalachians) if the GC had not heard of Mid/ LAC, I feel pretty certain she would not have known of Middlebury Community College!