Audition Reflection

College Majors Music Major
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<p>Me too :(</p>

<p>We have our first audition tomorrow. Well not “we”, but my S. For a state U music school. Saturday he has a pretty competitive conservatory audition. This is a kid who hasn’t auditioned for anything ever, he’s always been asked to join ensembles…as a jazz/contemporary bass player, things are, I suspect, looser.</p>

<p>I’m a nervous wreck. Also, it’s supposed to snow and there will be high winds, and we have to drive 2.5 hours to each one. I am just taking deep breaths, leaving extra travel time and praying a lot.</p>

<p>I’d say with a 13 yo you are ahead of the game…by the time he gets to college auditions, if he chooses to, he should be an old hand!</p>

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<p>Ohiobassmom, my heart goes out to you! Good luck and I’m sure he will do well. Even if he has a “bad” audition, son’s private teacher says that there are no bad auditions since they are all learning experiences. (He would know since he was asked to audition for one of the major symphony orchestras and froze at the audition.) Just drive carefully and make certain to have a copy of the SOM applications, music and directions. Son’s first audition last year, we drove 500 miles stayed at the hotel the night before and in the morning I realized that I had left the directions to the school at home. So we drove around the campus and starting asking anyone we saw where the school of music was located… Remember to enjoy this time with your son before he goes off to college.</p>

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<p>Zoosermom-</p>

<p>Welcome to the wonderful world of music, where unless you have family or friends who are in it, most parents start out just as clueless, so don’t feel badly because you don’t know, few of us did:).</p>

<p>In terms of what other posters have said about getting involved and such, obviously as parents we play a big role in supporting this and in the end you have to use your gut instincts in guiding your child through everything. With our S, for example, we stopped being actively involved in his lessons when he was in middle school, and especially when he switched to his current teacher, he was old enough and frankly at that point there was nothing we could really do for him and only would be in the way. Plus once kids get to higher level teachers, they don’t exactly encourage parents to be in there either. My recommendation is to give your kid as much autonomy as possible but retain being a parent if you feel final decisions need to be made (yeah, I know, great advice, it really helps, doesn’t it…not:). On the other hand, if the kid really does find a passion for music, it has to come from within, past a certain point if the kid isn’t practicing because they drive it, doesn’t show an interest in figuring out their path and so forth, a parent stepping in isn’t going to help much, because what happens when the rubber hits the road? I kind of like looking at the parents role as that of an advisor, one with an ultimate veto that is rarely used:)</p>

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<p>One thing my daughter’s teacher always advised her to do was to play for people. Whenever a competition/big performance was upcoming, she would instruct her to find different people to play for in different locations. She’s played for relatives, neighbors, friends, the high school department chair… anywhere she could get nervous and learn how to calm herself down. I think it’s really helped a lot</p>

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<p>Thank you so much for the kind words and wisdom. It is more appreciated than I can tell you!</p>

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<p>Zoosermom - welcome to the music forums!!! Hang on tight; it will be the ride of your life.</p>

<p>I can’t add to what others have already said; only to agree with them.</p>

<p>I can so relate to what you are saying, though, in terms of it being so nerve-wracking for the parent. In middle school, my S played at a festival (where you are judged, but do not compete against others). I was the accompanist. I was so nervous, my hands were shaking. Because this was a district-wide event, there were not enough pianos to go around, so classrooms were given keyboards. I had to play on a keyboard propped on two student desks. When I played loud, the keyboard slid all over the desk. It was a Mozart piece, and the orchestra reduction (when they arrange an orchestra part for just piano) had lots of notes, and I missed probably half of them. I left the room in tears, convinced that I had ruined my son’s life, and lost my temper with the band director (for doing something “so important” with such a shoddy set up.)</p>

<p>Of course, my son earned top ratings, and I learned it was worth it to pay someone else to accompany…</p>

<p>One thing I would remind you of is that your son is probably competing against others his age. It’s new to them, too. Don’t be intimidated.</p>

<p>(Editing to add): A couple suggestions. Give your son a banana ahead of time. Supposed to be calming. Might work, might be placebo, but does make you feel like you’re doing something.</p>

<p>Also, protect your S from well-meaning - or less well-meaning - peers and parents. Don’t let folks talk to him or distract him if he is trying to focus. Don’t let folks ask him over and over, “are you nervous?” Don’t let peers tell him how hard or how easy something is. My S learned to go lock himself in a bathroom stall if necessary, to avoid certain people or situations.</p>

<p>My S is 26, and a full time member of an orchestra now. I have reached the point where I can attend his performances without holding my breath the entire time. Only half the time.</p>

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<p>binx, I used to hold my breath, too, until the pieces got so long I passing out. The Chaconne probably caused brain damage. Seriously, I learned that rather than sitting around anxiously while the audition happens in another room, it’s best to do something distracting, like chatter about the weather to other parents, who will probably also welcome the distraction. Or hit you, depending on their own state of mind.</p>

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<p>In his pre-audition practice, make sure he practices at the same volume level as his audition. Too many kids practice the whole time at a lower volume which does not translate well when it’s for real. Auditions were harder on my son. Spelling bees were harder on me.</p>

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<p>thanks momofbassist…he’s going in 5 minutes…he’s been in a practice room working things out for an hour…I want to run up there and talk to him but I am going to sit here in the “green room” and wait for him to come down instead :)</p>

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<p>Holding your breath is dangerous, especially for parents of violinist, if they ever solo on the Beethoven Violin concerto you will definitely die of lack of oxygen <em>lol</em> (for those not violinsts, the Beethoven Violin concerto has the soloist standing up there a looong time before they start playing…kind of like the chorus in the 9th symphony, that sits up there for an hour before singing:). Even after all this time, seeing him in recitals, ensemble playing, solo playing as part of a pit band several years ago, etc, it still is hard to sit and watch. I am glad I take a lot of fish oil and my nails grow back quickly, otherwise they would call me nubs…</p>

<p>I tend to agree about playing/performing for people, the more the merrier, it is very, very important to get comfortable playing for people, doesn’t matter who it is. A lot of the time teachers IME will encourage kids to find performing opportunities like competitions and such, not to win them, but rather to get used to performing.</p>

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<p>One unexpected benefit for D3 was that she entered audition season with a lot of performance anxiety, but left feeling pretty confident about auditioning and having learned a lot of techniques that she’s been able to apply in other situations. Sort of like being thrown into the deep end…</p>

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<p>At S1’s first audition, he thought he did not do well. After the audition (when my son just wanted to leave), the professor on his instrument stopped us and told him that he had picked the most difficult movement and did it well than then proceeded to give him a 45 minute coaching session before we left. You never know how the process will go! It made him more confident at the next audition.</p>

<p>zoosermom - keep us updated on the school situation - it sounds like this school may be fine since they welcome a jazz clarinet - it is important to feel welcome</p>

<p>ohiobassmom - I tend to pace alot and breathe deeply during the auditions - I used to also try to keep S1 (and S2) away from people who were saying they were nervous ( when they were young). We visited New England Conservatory on a day when they had auditions ( we were just walking through the building checking it out) and I saw some extremely stressed out kids auditioning. The parent’s looked more stressed than the kids. I think staying calm, positive, upbeat and taking your cues from your musician is a bit part of it. I kept telling myself that it good to be here and that he is healthy and able to audition and ‘show his stuff’. That is enough to make you smile!</p>

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<p>Ok, so here’s the update. You guys were all correct! We found out last night that he was admitted, had received the school’s top music scholarship and will be honored next week or his “outstanding musical achievement.” I don’t even know what to say.
Thank you all for the warm welcome! I am sure I will have countless questions going forward.</p>

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<p>Congratulations! Sounds like he really impressed them.</p>

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<p>Congratulations zoosermon’s S!! What an achievement!</p>

<p>My S is regrouping and recalibrating this week, next audition is next weekend. This was a learning experience, his first audition for anything, ever. It served its purpose, showed him what he needs to do, and I am glad. </p>

<p>(thanks for letting me piggyback on your thread zoosermom)</p>

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<p>Ohiobassmom, I’m glad you piggybacked! I want to get to know everyone here.</p>

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<p>Congrats to your son and to you, zoosermom!</p>

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<p>Zoosermom I would hazard a guess that most of us here did not know what we were doing or getting into when we found this fantastic resource. Stick around. It’s a great community. We would not have made it through the college auditions without it.</p>

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<p>Good to hear your fantastic news!</p>

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<p>Zoosermom-</p>

<p>That is really great news! And it goes to show you, ya never know what the outcome of an audition is going to be:).Congrats!</p>