<p>Question: I realize that extracurricular activities are practically an unwritten requirement to gain acceptance to a selective school. Well, what happens if you can’t participate in after-school clubs? I can’t drive yet, my parents work very late, and I have a little sister who needs to be watched after school! I also understand that extracurriculars [...]</p>
<p>Similarly, my d’s EC’s have been curtailed a bit over the past two years … not her H.S. or church activities, so much, because I didn’t want her to lose out on those experiences. However, I asked her not to take a job. We’ve cared for in our home my mother who struggled with early onset alzheimer’s. She passed away a couple of months ago, but up until that time I was her 24/7 caregiver, and my daughter provided much needed respite for my husband and myself. Essentially, several times a month … for an evening out, or an ocassional weekend away, I paid my D to be g’ma’s caregiver: doing all the duties I would, varying from feeding, bathing, dressing, toileting, providing companionship and safety. This required a great deal of maturity, compassion and patience. And as having a scheduled job would have removed her from this “on-call” status (which was my lifesaver), it did affect some of her time for herself. My D didn’t want to write about this time period in any of her essays, as it’s very personal and also very close emotionally, in terms of Mom’s recent death, but I feel as though adcoms should be aware of it in some way. So, on the two applications she’s filled out so far, I had her write a short “blurb” in the “family commitments which have kept me from …” sections. Does that seem reasonable?</p>
<p>zebes</p>
<p>Also, for the next few months, I’m sure the writer of the question would have no trouble finding a local campaign that runs an evening phone bank. It sounds like she has more time in the evening. Many homeless shelters also need volunteers to work the graveyard shifts.</p>
<p>Zebes–My condolences on the loss of your mother and on the painful period that preceded her death. Yes, it’s absolutely reasonable that your daughter should explain her role during this stressful time to admission committees. If her obligations at home also affected her commitment to school activities, you might want to discuss this with the guidance counselor, who may also mention it in your daughter’s recommendation. Colleges do very much value these sorts of “extracurricular” endeavors.</p>
<p>^^^
Thank you. She will be asking her GC for a rec letter this week, actually. And I have written something up, and I was debating sending it in. I will now. 
I’ll show her your comments, too, maybe it’ll make her feel better about my insisting that she put something in the “family committment” portion of her application. She hates drawing attention to herself, and with this topic especially, she didn’t like feeling as though she was trying to garner a “whoa, look at me,” kind of response. She wrote it as clinically and matter of factly as she could, LOL … just the facts, and she and I came to a reasonable compromise. </p>
<p>Thank you for your condolances.</p>
<p>zebes</p>
<p>I’ve heard today’s students (high school and college) dubbed the “Look at me!” generation, so it’s actually refreshing to hear about teenagers who don’t fit that mold.</p>