Back from our Campus Visit

<p>First Impression: Notre Dame is certainly the most beautiful campus I have visited. While sitting on a bench taking in the scenery, I found the students to be friendly and most smiled and said hello as they walked by. I noticed there are a lot of kids jogging, kids coming and going from althetics with lacrosse sticks or basketballs in hand. The Catholic presence is extremely strong on campus and I was very moved when I visited the grotto.</p>

<p>However, the most important impression was my daughter's. She did an overnight in the dorms, and these overnights can make or break a decision. Unfortunately, she did not have a good experience. She thought the dorms were terrible, the worst she's seen - i.e., small and cramped. Our tour guide later explained to us that the dorm she stayed in is considered the smallest and there are better dorms on campus. D also said the kids kept their doors closed and there no socializing between the rooms. The students she stayed with in the dorms were all local to the area - no more than two hours away. She felt they were a bit more layed back than kids from the east coast, didn't show a lot of enthusiams or that "Notre Dame spirit" we expected, and she was left alone in the dorm for a few hours while her host took care of other obligations. At one point a roommate came in and never acknowleged my daughter's greeting - completely ignored her.</p>

<p>I wish I had something better to report, but this was quite a disappointment. We are Irish Catholic and consider Notre Dame our "Harvard." Our tour guide, on the other hand was very enthusiastic, and I tried to convince D that there are more students like the tour guide on campus.</p>

<p>I wouldn't get hung up on dorms being small. You don't need many things to live any way and if you can't fit everything into your room then you would be a bit of a prima donna. I don't know what said daughter is like, but the dorm room isn't a closet. And there will be a new women's dorm opening fall 2009 which there will be decanting and more space any way.</p>

<p>As for the little interaction, that could be a function of the way that certain dorms do their room picks (little common space and more bed space). If you go into any men's dorm the socializing is paradigm. Sometimes there is too much socializing (I couldn't get to sleep until 4 last night).</p>

<p>My D had a similar experience at small liberal arts college visit. She told me the other day the school would still be on her list if it weren't for that visit. Definitely a deal breaker, she can't shake it.</p>

<p>Yes the dorms at ND are small--old and cramped! When we visited campuses with our student, we saw some dorms that looked like hotel living! And, it is very difficult to give up a private bedroom at home with possibly a private bath. However, let me say that after having a student live on campus and finishing his second year now, the dorm living is important, but not that important as time goes by. This year, it seems that our student does not spend that much time in his room, nor do his roommates. Between the activities they are involved in, classes, study sessions, etc., our student indicates that he does not even see his roommates that often. This year, when he has had to do some serious studying he says to moves to the study lounge in his dorm--so he rarely studies in his room. He is fortunate in that he has been in a quad this year with a little more space, but he is moving back to a larger double next year. And, while he is not that involved with dorm activities (he says he just does not have the time-have to draw the line somewhere!), he is happy with his dorm. The location for him cannot be beat in terms of dining and classes. I think his roommate feels the same way. I really don't think he will plan to live off-campus as a senior. Yes, when we moved him in as a freshman, it was difficult because that was the year that so many kids accepted admission to ND and ND was not prepared. The dorms were literally overflowing and son lived in a double that probably should have been a single. And knowing the price of tuition, etc., it was difficult to leave him that year because of the cost. But, he survived and remained in his dorm for this year even tho he could have applied for housing in the new men's dorm. I guess that what I am trying to say is that while I can certainly understand your daughter's reaction to dorm living, I think our student can look back and now say that it is not the most important thing in making a decision about ND. There are MANY things to consider and I think that for our student, the academics came first. For us as parents, I am grateful that he chose ND for the safety aspect among other things. As I mentioned, we visited many colleges from the west coast to the east coast, and we witnessed a lot of things in dorms including many things that would literally curl your toes! It can be a difficult decision to make regarding where to attend, but try to encourage your daughter to look at ND as a whole and not just based on a dorm room, or 1 or 2 students. Critically compare it to other schools she has visited before making that final decision. I wish you the best of luck in your decision!</p>

<p>Best of luck to you and your daughter!!! Please know that there are other students out there! Some of the dorms are pretty small, for sure, but others are really very large (west quad for example). In the end, it really doesn't matter~there is so much dorm pride among most of the students! Their dorm becomes their "home" and they truly love it! Now, if your daughter ran into some of the more dull types, it is just a shame. Most of the ND kids I know, are in love with their "place" and wouldn't trade it for new! I think a more realistic example of the "typical" ND kid was probably your tour guide...really!</p>

<p>I can certainly understand your daughter's point of view after this disappointing visit. However, it seems as though your visit was not typical. My daughter is a freshman, living in a triple which is supposed to be a double. There is so little room that the three girls really can't fit in the very SMALL common space at the same time. Is it ideal? No way! But she has adjusted and quite well. As the other posters indicated, the students grow to love their dorms and it becomes their home. The dorm life is one of the best attributes of ND. I can understand the apprehension, as I was quite unnerved after seeing my daughter's living situation. (Her space is literally the size of a twin bed. Her furniture is lofted and holding up her bed is a desk and portable closet.) Over time, this becomes less and less important. </p>

<p>Concerning the girls that she met, that too seems atypical. Obviously, students come all across the country and the world. In general, people are very friendly. Feel free to PM me with any other questions. I wish you the best of luck with this very difficult decision!</p>

<p>NYmama....
My D had totally opposite overnight! She stayed in quad in McGlinn(?)....delightful girl from San Diego, roommates from NY & FLA I believe. Doors open, girls walking by stopped to say Hi to my D; D went to 2 classes, but when host student had a French class, host arranged for a friends to show D around. D was always in company of at least one ND student....all showing great ND spirit. Host girl introduced her to many students, and they viewed ND/Marquette hoops game in the "brother" dorm (out by midnight!). By the time she left, D felt she had whole new group of friends at ND. Host has even "facebooked" my D and was thrilled that D enrolled.</p>

<p>Yea, dorms aren't the spacious, but D had such a positive experience that she said it wasn't a big deal--there's a lounge and library to study if desired--and that the dorm "spirit"/commraderie just wowed her.</p>

<p>Sorry your D didn't had great time--I just have to feel it's an anomly---kinda like getting on the crappy tour, when the friend had the awesome tour....</p>

<p>Our daughter had an overnight visit also. Although the campus was beautiful and her host spent a lot of time with her, the visit didn't win her over completely and she is still looking at her other choices, one an Ivy League school.</p>

<p>Main concern is the fact she has never attended a football game in her life and isn't really into team sports. Second concern is that the visit validated her belief that the university is in a remote location without much of anything around it. </p>

<p>I'm sure she would do well there and make good friends, but I am also pretty sure that she would not enjoy football season, which is why I'm leaning towards another school that is less sports-crazy. I do like the safety aspect of the dorms and the campus.</p>

<p>This is an interesting thread. We faced the exact same situation. D was accepted early action and ND was her dream school. We had previously visited in the summer when few students were present. She went back for an overnight in February, wanted to fall completely in love, and send in her deposit when we got home. Unfortunately, this did not happen. Her overnight host was a lovely girl. They went to a basketball game (D is a sports fanatic) and went back to a quiet dorm where most people were studying (on a Thursday night). The dorm room was apparently a bit isolated from the rest of the floor, so this may have been the reason, but there was no socializing between rooms happening. We previously loved the idea of single sex dorms, but D had the impression that it was harder to meet guys to be "just friends"- and this was confirmed by her host. She noted that girls were eating with girls, boys with boys, at the dining hall- not a lot of mingling. She also was unsettled by the close connection with St. Mary's- was told by her host that it was harder to find dates for dorm functions, etc. because the guys were frequently already going to a St. Mary's function. She wanted a school that had one cohesive student body.</p>

<p>Whether or not this is true, unfortunately this experience was all she had to go on, and she has decided to attend another college. We are both so sad that she is saying "no" to ND, and she knew that she could be happy there (frankly she could have been happy at all her choices) but it just didn't sing to her during her visit.</p>

<p>On another note, I just cancelled my reservation at the Morris Inn for move-in weekend, so there is a vacancy if anyone is looking for a room. Good luck to everyone!</p>

<p>that was a sad story :'(</p>

<p>I just got back from visiting this weekend. I stayed in Alumni Hall, and the first thing I noticed was how ridiculously cramped the dorms were. Gah. Not sure I can really choose this school over some other great options when the student body seems overly obsessed with football and the dorms are closets.</p>

<p>Everyone was exceptionally nice and welcoming, though.</p>

<p>I would think that the fact that everyone was exceptionally(you didn't just post nice - you used the word exceptionally!) nice and welcoming would overcome the small dorm rooms and the obsession over football. I guess it all depends on what your priorities are when making your decision.</p>

<p>If you enjoy watching football, then spending 3-4 hours every weekend for at least 12 weeks is great fun. If you don't, then having to hear about it all the time probably isn't. I think other schools have a better balance between sports and athletics.</p>

<p>Parelli -</p>

<p>Just curious - didn't your daughter know that football was a large part of Notre Dame when she applied? It is all mixed in with the spirit and tradition of the school. But Notre Dame isn't all about football - it has so many other aspects to it...!</p>

<p>Sure, those other aspects are what attracted her (and us) to it, and they still do. I am sure she would get a great education and make good friends.</p>

<p>But after reading the ND football thread, I really started to wonder whether someone who doesn't participate on game day would fit in or enjoy themselves. And don't say just let her try it to see if she likes it -- not everyone wants to be part of a screaming crowd every weekend. Lots of people enjoy attending operas also, but that doesn't mean that if I go enough times I wlll grow to like it. </p>

<p>I'd love to hear from ND students who didn't participate in the football games and still enjoyed their time at the school.</p>

<p>Parelli, I can’t answer your challenge and I can understand that ND football may seem over-the-top, especially when viewed from the outside, but, you really don’t know it until you live it. </p>

<p>Before ND, my son had gone to only one of his high school football games and then only because he was assigned to take photographs for the yearbook. Football was not on his personal radar screen when he chose ND. His Dad and I splurged for his freshman season ticket package anyway, knowing he might find it fun to attend the games with his dorm-mates. I remember the cell phone call during the first home game - the excitement in his voice as he shared the pregame hype and the thrill of the day. Needless to say, he’s now a fan and plans to attend every home game of his college career and any game he can make as a graduate. He is not at ND because of football but he has found it to be a bonus. </p>

<p>So, it’s hard for me to think of ND football as a reason NOT to attend ND :). Just saying, she might have been surprised and enjoyed it. And if not, no one would make her go to the games. You’re only talking about six or so Saturday afternoons in the fall (home games), anyway.</p>

<p>Yeah, i agree with Greta. I don't think there is a way you could put a negative spin on having great sports teams; if you are into that enjoy it and if not its not like you'll be a social outcast.</p>

<p>Well, D. absolutely did not give a rip about football, and barely attended any games in high school and is not a team sports person. SHe is however an athlete (running) and she went from being completely oblivious to football to being a perceptive observer and an enjoyer of the whole season. She has also decided to major in Anthro, so maybe her interest will someday be published in some obscure journal about the tribal bonding rites of upwardly mobile Irish Catholic midwesterners, but still....everything can be interesting on some level.</p>

<p>well, in the end, she finally decided last night to go to the Ivy league school with more majors that she was interested in to choose from. I still haven't been convinced that a person who is not into team sports (watching or playing) would be able to fit in at ND (yes, believe it or not, there are people who aren't into team sports). I totally understand the attraction to the school, and I'm sure it is easy to make life-long friends there, but given the need for other entertainment besides sports she wanted more of a college town nearby and also wanted more housing options than the dorms provide. I'm glad it's finally May 1st, the past five months have been difficult.</p>

<p>Parelli -</p>

<p>Believe it or not - no one ever stated that they believed that there weren't people who aren't into team sports at Notre Dame.</p>

<p>Yes, you're right, I didn't mean to imply that, but if you look at the number of intramural teams it sure appears that almost everyone participates in them.</p>