I have not looked back at this site since last “boarding school season” My daughter was waitlisted at all eight schools that she applied to. Andover, Exeter, Choate, Deerfield, SPS, Loomis, Hotchkiss and Lawrenceville We contacted one to find out how she could improve her chances. Their reply. “Her folder shows incredible remarks. She is wonderful, the problem is that we selected the financial aid box!!” All things happen for a reason. I will never forget how low my daughter felt on March 15th. She felt like a fool. The AO’s all loved her. They sent Christmas cards, reached out and made her feel good. The dance teacher at Deerfield said she would be perfect at their school. She said she was on the admission board and that my daughter would be on her wish list. Again waitlisted at all 8 schools. She did not reapply. She is very happy at our local school in the IB program. We are very happy to have her home. Not ready to let her fly on her own yet. So to all of the parents please be ready to comfort your child. My daughter felt like she was not good enough. Like something was wrong with her. It has taken a long time to recover from the experience. I always said we would put 100% effort into the application process and understand that there is nothing more we could have done. I am so proud of my daughter. Be proud of your children no matter what the results are on March 15th. They are ALL incredible kids. AO’s might act like you are in… but remember they tell that to everyone. It is a business. It is a game. Be careful… Be prepared…
Sage advice, Funaviator - thank you. I’m so sorry that your daughter had such a painful experience. She sounds a phenomenal candidate. A salutary lesson in not drawing inferences, making assumptions or counting chickens…
Thank you for your advice. Do you think she would have been accepted if no FA was needed? My son applied to the same schools, we do not need FA and is applying as a recalculated freshman. He has high SSAT scores, great recs and ECs but his current grades are not as high as he’d like them to be.
@Britmom5 - I agree, especially about not drawing inferences from positive comments and feedback.
@funaviator - Thanks for posting. So sorry, I’m sure that was very painful for your daughter (and you!)
So true. @funaviator, I am happy to know that your daughter is doing well now. Mine is too.
Parents, do take heed of this and of ThacherParent’s advice under “Not Forgetting the Big Picture.”
I will try my best to prepare myself for March 10th. Thank you for sharing your story, funaviator. I’m glad to hear that your daughter is thriving at her school right now.
Very very wise post. Re: the realities of financial aid considerations, please read this NY Times article (if you haven’t already)
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/03/15/your-money/for-boarding-schools-an-evolving-financial-aid-philosophy.html
p.s. the above posted article also speaks directly to the ways in which boarding school admission committees rank applicants. (This ranking method is in keeping with what we learned from a college panel comprised of AOs from University of Chicago and Wellesley College.)
Well, sadly, that probably rules us out of the competition! We’ll be here to cheer the rest of you on, come M10!!!
I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if we hadn’t tried, though!
It sounds like you and your daughter did everything right. She sounds like such a fantastic kid that she will do well anywhere. Thank you again for your advise and for sharing your story.
This is also why “casting a wide net” is a good idea. With or without FA, when you apply to only uber-selective schools, you are competing with way more great candidates than there are available spots.
Funaviator, I’m sorry your daughter had such a painful experience, and I’m very glad that things have turned around for her. She is obviously resilient… And that will serve her very well going forward.
I would agree with cameo. There are so many really really good schools that aren’t as selective simply because they are more off the radar. The OP’s story proves that excellent candidates can still be rejected because there are just so many of them! I’m glad things are working out now.
Karen0, I believe if we were full pay she would have been accepted. Besides Loomis telling us that FA caused her to be passed on… Choate’s waitlist letter touched on not having enough aid to accept her. They sent different waitlist letters. We learned a lot from the whole process and will now be better prepared to apply for college. Her SSAT score was a 94. She had plenty of extracurricular activities (flute, dance, theater) Essays were outstanding. Interviews good too. We will never know exactly why she was not accepted… We went for the big schools… There are not may openings when you start to break it down. One of the reasons my daughter did not reapply is because she did not want to go to a school that played the game that the AO’s play. I believe if you have a very strong hook you are in. Something that really makes you stand out from the other applicants. So many of the applicants are smart, and play instruments and sports and are top of the class in their current school. I do not think your son’s grades will keep him from being accepted. It will all depend on if other students play the same sports… have better ECs, grades, SSAT scores and come from an under represented area… So many things go into the decision. It is out of your control… All you can control is how you deal with March 15th. Good luck to all… I wish you all could get in… 
Thanks funaviator for very good advice to keep all these amazing applicants grounded. I’m sorry your daughter had such a rough lesson. I wanted to share with those people that do need financial aid, it does exist! My daughter goes to a small school that has a small endowment, it’s not a wealthy school and she receives significant aid. It was terrifying waiting for the reward letter but it worked out.