Boyfriend's financial picture included on financial aid forms?

Paying for College
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<p>I'm considering the following scenario and would like to know if it will affect my daughter's financial aid. I was told by someone who knows a lot about financial aid that the income a "significant other" or boyfriend contributes to the household is taken into consideration when determining financial aid. I've read everywhere else that it's only if you are married. I need to know before making a decision to move in with him since he does have high income. It doesn't seem right since I'm the one who will be paying for her college and he has nothing to do with her support.</p>

<p>My daughter is currently living with me and I've been her sole support her entire life. Her biological dad does not contribute anything financially. She and I now live alone.</p>

<p>Here's the potential scenario:</p>

<p>I may move in with my boyfriend and my 17 year-old daughter may move into a separate house on the same property where her biological dad lives. Even though I won't be living with my daughter anymore, I would continue to pay her rent and all her living expenses. Her dad will not be paying any support for her or contributing to college. </p>

<p>My boyfriend and I would live in a separate home in a different area, not on that same property. He owns this house and pays the mortgage and utilities. I will pay toward this so it's somewhat like rent for me.</p>

<p>So when I put household income on financial aid forms, do I need to include my boyfriend's income? I'll also need to complete the Profile form since she's applying to these colleges. Will I need to include my boyfriend's house equity or say that I'm renting?</p>

<p>Does my daughter need to be living with me to include her as part of my household?</p>

<p>Thanks,
Jane</p>

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<p>Nothing I have read indicates that a roommates income would be used to determine aid packages unless he has adopted your daughter, but I also think that your d would need to be living with you to be part of your household.</p>

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<p>???</p>

<p>Is your D a senior in HS?</p>

<p>It sounds like your D will soon be in custody of her Dad…even if you’re paying for her stuff.</p>

<p>However if she’s somehow still included in your custody, you won’t include your BF’s income, but you might have to indicate somewhere that he contributes to household expenses (which means that you’re not paying for all household expenses)</p>

4

<p>“the income a “significant other” or boyfriend contributes to the household is taken into consideration when determining financial aid.”</p>

<p>Read the IRS "Chief Counsel’s office (SCA 1998-041) letter.
Make sure that you contribute in the household by paying electricity, groceries, etc and keep the checks/credit card receipts. Each one files separately as their own head of household.</p>

<p>For financial aid, this is directly from fafsa:
"Q. If I live with an aunt, uncle, or grandparent, should that relative’s income be reported on my FAFSA?
A. Generally, no. You can only report your birth parents’ or adoptive parents’ income on your FAFSA. Only if a relative has adopted you and is now your adoptive parent can you report that person’s information on your FAFSA. However, you must report for question 44(j) any cash support given by relatives except food and housing.
Q. What if I live with a girlfriend or boyfriend who pays the rent?
A. You should not report any information for a friend or roommate unless the two of you are actually married or are considered to have a common-law marriage under state law. You must report in Question 44(j) any cash support given by the friend, except food and housing. You would have to report the rent the roommate paid on your behalf.</p>

<p>Q. What’s the difference between cash support and in-kind support?
A. Cash support is support given either in the form of money or money that is paid on your (the student’s) behalf. You must report cash support as untaxed income. Thus, if a friend or relative gives you grocery money, it must be reported as untaxed income in Question 44(j) If the friend or relative pays your electric bill or part of your rent, you must also report those payments.
Examples of in-kind support are free food or housing that a family receives, usually in exchange for work or services. You usually don’t report such support.</p>

<p>However, the application does require you to report the value of housing a family receives as compensation for a job. The most common example is free housing or a housing allowance provided to military personnel or members of the clergy, which is required to be reported in Question 44(g).
Q. How does a family decide who should be counted in the household size?
A. Anyone in the immediate family who receives more than 50% support from a dependent student’s parents or an independent student and spouse may be counted in the household size even if that person does not reside in the house. For example, a sibling who is over 24 but still receives the majority of his/her support from the parents can be included. Siblings who are dependent (as defined by the FAFSA) as of the date you apply for aid are also included, regardless of whether they receive more than 50% of their support from the parents. Any other person who resides in the household and receives more than 50% support from the parents may also be counted, as long as they will continue to reside with your parents and the support is expected to continue through June 30, 2013. "</p>

<p>The above irs letter explains that you do not have to pay half the cost of the entire house, but at least half of your household-that’s you and your daughter.</p>

<p>Your problem in the scenario that you pose is different than you think because your daughter will leave with dad, so according to fafsa:</p>

<p>“Q. If my parents are divorced, whose information do I need?
A. Report the information of the parent with whom you lived the most during the 12 months preceding the date you completed the FAFSA. It does not make a difference which parent claims you as a dependent for tax purposes. If you did not live with either parent or lived equally with each parent, the parental information must be provided for the parent from whom you received the most financial support during the preceding 12 months or the parent from whom you received the most support the last time support was given.” </p>

<p>If your daughter lives with dad, his income has to be put in fafsa, not yours. When you file the non-custodial forms you have to include the bio dad’s income. It is not whether the non-custodial parent contributed financially, but the amount of contact that parent had with the child.</p>

<p>Jane, it seems that you were never married with bio dad, correct? If not, has there been a custody order? I am not talking about acknowledgement of paternity but just legal determination in court of who has physical/legal custody. If you have not, then you are presumed by law to have sole physical and legal custody. It does not matter whether she lives with you or dad, you maintain sole physical and legal custody. Just for fafsa will be a problem if she lives with him.</p>

<p>If the bio dad has a lot of income then you have to get a waiver from the school so his income is not calculated in the financial aid award. You will need at least 2 letters from unrelated people to write that bio dad does not have relationship/support for D. The people can be clergy/school counselor/lawyer, etc. Basically, just keep receipts to document everything. You do not have to include the boyfriend in any financial aid or tax form. You do not support the boyfriend and you do pay the expenses of, remember, YOUR household, not the entire’s house.</p>

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<p>Don’t include your boyfriend’s income. However, your daughter will no longer be living with you - that will adjust things, no doubt.</p>

<p>Have you thought about putting off the move-in with the boyfriend until your D goes to college? there may be benefits to her that go beyond the impact on fafsa.</p>

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<p>I don’t think the boyfriedn is going to be an issue. But if your daughter is living on her father’s property, more than she is living with you in a year, he will become the custodial parent, never mind the history or the lack of support.</p>

<p>Also if you were considering getting a non custodial waver for the dad which is sometimes requested in such cases when the non custodial parent is not in the child’ life, that is out the window if she is living on her property, and really if she even has that option. THat won’t be an issue on the FAFSA but if she is looking at private colleges that require PROFILE, it will be an issue for a great number of such schools.</p>

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<p>^For legal purposes, just because the child goes to live with the non-custodial parent, physical and legal custody and child support does not change unless ordered/adjudicated by a judge, or the custodial parent signs a notarized letter where he/she relinquinshes custody. If the parents were never married, the father can not get any type of custody unless he petitions the court. They can not even do it in a notarized form.</p>

<p>That’s a word of caution, as we also saw at the recent legal proceedings with the Cristie Brinkley case, if you have a child suport obligation do not stop to pay the money to the other parent because the child came to live with you. Unless the court orders it, you are responsible to continue to pay. </p>

<p>For the OP if the child goes to live with dad, then the issue will also be with fafsa because it specifics refers to such a situation:</p>

<p>“Q. If my parents are divorced, whose information do I need?
A. Report the information of the parent with whom you lived the most during the 12 months preceding the date you completed the FAFSA. It does not make a difference which parent claims you as a dependent for tax purposes.”</p>

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<p>Thanks for your responses. To answer your questions, no her dad and I were never married. His name is on her birth certificate but there has never been a custody agreement. She’s always lived with me and I’ve always provided full support. But she does have a good relationship with her dad. She is not living WITH him, but she may be living in an entirely separate house right next to the house he is renting on the same property, and I’d be paying for her house. I know it’s a strange situation, but I cannot afford to live where we’re living right now and I think that it’s best for her to live there next door to her dad rather than living with my boyfriend and I. My daughter is very happy about this and is a very unique and responsible person and will be 18 soon, and it really seems that it is in her best interest, even though it may seem sort of a strange situation. Plus her high school is near by and we have long-term close friends right across the street who always look out for her. So everyone is trying to talk me into this, my daughter especially, and I’m just trying to make the right decision for her. Of course I’d be there most days visiting and checking up; I’m certainly not abandoning her. </p>

<p>Her dad has very little income, he’s retired and living on a minimal amount of social security, plus investments. His income is even less than mine I think, but it’s his investments and savings that will probably be viewed as assets.</p>

<p>18 years ago, our verbal agreement was that I would have a child on my own, no strings attached. I agreed that I would have full financial and take all responsibility. I chose to be a single mom. And we’ve maintained this agreement even though he has a wonderful relationship with her as her dad. I’m happy that he’s in her life and is a very positive influence so I’ve not asked for support.</p>

<p>So she really would not be living with him but it may look like that since the houses are both on the same property right next to each other. </p>

<p>Jane</p>

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<p>Jane, I am glad you gave a lot of details at your initial post. Many people only ask a question without providing a good description of the situation. As you’ve seen your question was about a different aspect but as the other posters noticed immediately, the problem will be with the dad’s assets, not the boyfriend’s. Since we write also for others who read in the future, nothing personal to you, in such situation, you should always have something in writing. There is nothing strange about your situation. It is just nowadays, it is always best to have everything in writing. If you had written an agreement, instead of verbal, you would have a good chance to argue that you always supported the child yourself and there was no financial support by biodad. Usually the college fa guidelines are based on the divorce model so if one can show that the parents were never married, there was a legal agreement about child support, and there was no financial support given all these years, you would had a good chance to prevale. Also, it is a good idea to have a written agreement because you might die (hypothetically speaking) and there could be so many issues about custody afterwards, issues about travelling overseas as some countries do not allow the child to board on the plane unless the form required by the foreign country is signed by both bio parents, or show an existing court order that states who has physical and legal custody, etc.</p>

<p>The problems that you have now are:

  1. Does the child live with the dad? The answer is no. It does not matter that it is the same property as there is a different electricity meter, etc, right? It is not just a room in the same boarding house, correct? Since it is a different apartment/condo/townhouse, make sure there are electric bills, etc, everything under YOUR name, and keep checks/receipts for everything. You are allowed to have multiple houses.
  2. Dad’s income will be taken under consideration by schools that require non-custodial css profile. What can you do right now, in advance? Is there a clergy, attorney, psychologist, whoever you can think who is not related to you or the child, who can write a letter that you were not married to the father and you were the only one financially supporting the child and the biodad just has a casual relationship with the child, but that’s all there is. You will need 2 such letters. Request a waiver for the non-custodial parent’s income when your D applies to college. You can also call in mid May a random college, same tier as the one she wants to apply, talk to the financial aid office, tell them you are interested in the school and ask them what should you do in such situation (only discuss about the biodad’s income for the non-custodial profile. Do not discuss or explain re living arrangements/boyfriend, etc).</p>
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<p>Thanks so much for all this great info and advice. Really appreciate it.</p>

<p>Jane</p>

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<p>The situation the way that Op has presented it will not make her eligible for a non-custodial waiver. In addition, schools will not accept attorney letters for non-custodial waivers.</p>

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<p>None of this will matter if your daughter applies to a school that request either the non-custodial profile or income and assets of the non-custodial parents on their own form. When it comes to distributing need based financial aid, the 2 of you are first in line when it comes to her education.</p>

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<p>^Yes they do accept. I was told directly from the FA officers in 6 different schools what letters were needed and accepted. A minimum of 2 letters from either attorney on the custody case, school counselor, clergy, psychologist, police officer, abused shelter staff, work supervisor from decades ago who had intimate knowledge of the case, etc. Their only qualifications are not to be family members and have knowledge of the case in their official capacity.
This is from the first letter I found on the web, it is for nyu:
“2. Please attach supporting documentation for full consideration. Documentation may include legal/court documents or a letter from an attorney, member of the clergy, therapist, teacher, guidance counselor, or other nonfamily member who is familiar with your circumstances and is in a position to confirm your explanation of the
situation.”</p>

<p>Since they were never married, the standard of proof is not as high as a divorced parent. Anyway, the OP does not have anything to lose to request one. The FA cmt will decide to accept it or not.</p>

<p>From the same link at nyu: "Submit additional information about the history and current status of your
relationship with your noncustodial parent, including frequency of any contact you have had with that parent, a history of any financial support provided for you by that parent and any other information that you believe will help
us to better understand the circumstances that you think make it necessary to waive the requirement for Noncustodial Parent Information. "</p>

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<p>I expect the schools may wonder why the extra incurred expense of not having the daughter live with her custodial parent.</p>

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<p>Which is exactly why an attorney’s letter most likely will not help Op. There was no custody case. They have never been to court and OP has not taken any legal action against NCP. </p>

<p>At this juncture, unless the attorney is a close family friend who has been familiar with the family history, it is highly unlikely that the attorney would have any first hand knowledge of Op’s situation. </p>

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<p>From the school’s end parent will have to update emergency contact each year which she will show that she does not live in same household as custodial parent. Depending on the state where she resides, if the child is under 17 1/2 this could easily become an ACS case because the school officials are mandated reporters.The school would not be able to write a NCP waiver with out detailing the student’s entire story.</p>

<p>Another challenge that OP will have is if she lives with BF and daughter lives in her own place, even though she is paying the rent, OP will not be able to file as Head of household because D will not be considered a dependent on her taxes.</p>

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<p>OK, you can’t afford to live where you are is understandable. But, why incur the extra expense of maintaining 2 households? I’m not sure why this makes sense and not particularly frugal if your saving money for college.</p>

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<p>The cases I have known where the non custodial parent was taken out of the picture by PROFILE schools that request both parents’ financial, have been cases when a school, a minister, a social worker can say, “what parent?” In other words, the parent is gone, out of the picture, no relationship, as if he did not exist. Like he as absconded, and even if he owed the money, getting it is nigh impossible and effort has to be shown. If he has a relationship with his daughter and is seen with her, the fact that you have a contract between the two of you that he doesn’t have to pay for anything for her means nothing. Heck, if that were the case, it would be standard for all separation and divorce contracts. Everyone would have that wording so their kids would have a shot at lots of college bucks. You get a free pass with the FAFSA which calculates the EFC without the NCP info, and there are schools that do not requre NCP, even using PROFILE, but the schools that tend to give the most generous amounts and try to meet full need tend to ask for the NCP financials, and they don’t care about any lawyer statements or agreements. If the guy is in the kid’s life, and unless there are those in position of trust like school counselor, minister, etc to say he is not, then his stuff gets counted.</p>

<p>One of my closest friends had that problem. Her ex was high income but refused to pay for college. Refused to even fill out the forms, But he was in the kids’ lives in that he had shown up for their main events and the high schools could not in good conscience or legally say, the guy was not in the picture. He just did not want to pay and would not pay which fits the description of a lot of parents, not just ones who are divorced. So her kids got funds that FAFSA only sources would give, but the DD had to give up on her private schools as her dad would not pay, and the schools would not give aid to her based on that.</p>

<p>Now some schools are more lenient about NCP than others, so give it a try. Just don’t count on it. Some schools are very much sticklers about the “not in the student’s” life situation.</p>

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<p>^As I previously said the cases are seen differently if the child was born out of wedlock and if there was a divorce. Even if the non-custodial parent pays child support, the custodial parent can obtain a waiver from the FA. In divorce situations, they examine the length of separation and divorce. If the parents were divorced 17 years ago, there is a very good possibility that the waiver will be granted. The threshold is ~<10 years from the time the child goes to school. Again, they examine both the financial support provided all these years, as well as the level of contact between NCP and child. If the NCP both provides child support and has contact with the child, the waiver will not be granted. Only in states that the NCP is required to contribute equally for tuition until the child graduates from college, can be a court mandated enforcement, both to pay and fill out the forms, or if it was stated in the divorce agreement. Unfortunately, unless one has a good attorney, they do not think of such details into the future.</p>

<p>The schools do care about court records and attorney statements because every case is examined individually. There can be myriad of individual circumstances like domestic abuse, long term non-contact, etc. The NCS is not required to have absconded, nor that he/she does not pay child support, for the NCP waiver to be granted. In the OP’s case, there is a good chance that she will be granted because she was always responsible for all financial support and has never received any money from bio-dad. It is as if he was a sperm-donor. (Jane we are not judging, just discussing it on how to present it) He had some contact with the child, but that was it. The key is that there was no marriage. It would have been easier if they had a legal agreement, so she has to think from whom to get letters. Is there a colleague/supervisor who knew her for many years since the child was born and can attest that the mother was the only one who provided financial support, did not live with the bio-dad, etc. The second letter will be from the school advisor. Even if she moves with boyfriend, she can still live in 2 houses. That’s why the OP has to make sure that all bills for D’s house are under her name, including the lease. Clearly, if she moves with the boyfriend she will have no lease/ownership of his house. Thus, she should file as home address for irs using the house she will have for daughter.(That’s also a good idea because things happen when you live with someone and if you are not married/have a joint lease or ownership, aka there is no legal agreement among you, he can kick you out of the house and you will have no recourse about it.) Jane, sign the lease under your name for daughter, and put both your names on the mailbox. Send credit card bills, bank statements, etc to that house, and you can just pay them online, you do not need the actual stub. It is what many young singles do, if they can afford it, keep their own apartment but move all stuff to the boyfriend/girlfriend’s house.</p>

<p>For the IRS, the quote presented by another poster is for any qualifying person, but for a child there are different requirements, from the same publication 501:
" A child is treated as living with a parent for a night if the child sleeps:
At that parent’s home, whether or not the parent is present, or</p>

<p>In the company of the parent, when the child does not sleep at a parent’s home (for example, the parent and child are on vacation together)…</p>

<p>Relatives who do not have to live with you. A person related to you in any of the following ways does not have to live with you all year as a member of your household to meet this test.
Your child, stepchild, foster child, or a descendant of any of them (for example, your grandchild). (A legally adopted child is considered your child.)"</p>

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<p>From the sound of it, he had much more than “some contact”. They have a good relationship.</p>

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<p>The OP should give it a go. If she can get NCP waivers for her situation, fine for her. She should just be prepared that some schools are stickler on this, and they don’t care what the court papers say, what the state laws are or whether the parent will pay or not. Doesn’t matter. The colleges are permitted this discretion with their funds. </p>

<p>So give it a whirl, but do not depend on it. We, on the board, are not the ones that have to be swayed by the facts and arguments. It’s the financial aid offices of the schools to which kids in this situation have to deal with. I’m just telling you that it is not an auto-go.</p>

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<p>IRS has different qualifications than FAFSA & CSS.
If she is going to live on the same physical piece of land as her father, it is going to be pretty hard to argue there has been no contact.</p>