Breaking Up With Girlfriend

<p>Hey I need some advice and I've heard it from friends and heard all the different sides to what I should do but I really need just some fresher perspectives. </p>

<p>So my girlfriend and I had gone out in highschool from mid sophmore year right up until we left for college about 2 weeks ago. I know a lot of people say I'm young and that I don't know what it means but I can guarantee you that this was true love. Her and I were just completely entrhalled in each other and the last two years were the happiest of my life. We always worried about college and had gone back and forth about staying together and breaking up for college but finally decided it was better to break up, but stay close friends that tell each other everything. </p>

<p>I moved in to college about 2 days before she did. Once I was here, she was still talkling with me as if we were just really close friends and almost nothing had changed which I loved. But then as soon as she hit college, I dropped off the face of the earth pretty much. She never texted, barely responded, and just didn't care about me anymroe at all. I must give you a little background about her. She comes from a very very hard background, her father was an abusive alcoholic and her mother was near destitute so she had always been insecure, stressed, and just always weighed down by her problems at home. I was her escape though and she knew that I was always there for her. I had always told her come college she could forget these problems and become someone without them. This is why I think she is so wrapped up in her new life. She is just trying to forget her problems right now and is taking in all the attention she is getting from guys and girls, and shutting me out in the process. </p>

<p>I still love her though and as improbable as everyone says it is, I still have hope for us. In the beginning I had a hard time coping and ended up blowing up her phone with texts, to which she got very annoyed. All her friends told me that I just need to give her space as she is just going through a phase(one in which she is partying all the time, hooking up with guys alot), something she has never experienced before. It is because of her background that I in a way forgive her for what she's doing and I have a feeling when I see her at THanksgiving all might be better. I want her to know that there is this guy who thinks of her literally every moment and that he is a guy worth keeping but right now all she sees is her new lifestyle, her new escape. So I have resolved to give her space and not talk to her for about a month, hoping that either if she doesnt contact me sooner, by then things might have calmed down and perhaps we can become closer by then. </p>

<p>I just really want to know what people think I should do to get her back. Will she eventualyl realize that this lifestyle is going to end up harming her and that she had a guy who cared so much about her? I must say please don't tell me it's not worth it as I have gone through hell and back in much worse situtations with her when we did go out to do things for her. I love this girl with all my heart and I will be patient to get her back.</p>

<p>Dude, not to be rude, but you need to break up that huge long block of texts in paragraphs before anyone is even going to attempt to read that.</p>

<p>true sorry</p>

<p>Don’t wait around for her for too long. You seem like a good guy, but chances are she isn’t going to come back to you no matter what you do. Do your best to move on - Thanksgiving makeup isn’t and shouldn’t be good enough. Please resign yourself to the fact that this was a high school relationship - I believe you when you say it was true love, but you need to move on. There’s not much more I can say, except that I’ve seen many of my best friends go through the same dilemmas, with much of the same results. If you are truly meant to be together she will realize it and contact you - only then should you respond accordingly. Don’t initiate contact, don’t beg her to get back with you, don’t be desperate and dwell on the times you had in high school. If she doesn’t realize quickly/soon what she had was worth it, then you deserve better. There are no ifs, ands or buts.</p>

<p>^ that…</p>

<p>you expect me to read all of that can you revise it and make a shorter version</p>

<p>I am going through a similar situation and it really sucks because I think about this girl all day as well. Fa-la-la-lena is right and summed it up perfectly. I want to tell her how strongly I feel about her and be the hopeless romantic, but that’s only going to come across as desperate and weird. If things are really going to work out she needs to show interest and if she’s not then it’s not meant to be. She could realize her mistake after the first year or maybe not even until she graduates, but that’s life I guess you can’t force it.</p>

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<p>Well, Scottykid, she sounds ‘experienced’ <em>now</em> !!</p>

<p>As Star Trek’s Scotty would say in his immitable Scottish brogue :</p>

<p>*" Cap’n … I donna think my di-lithium crystals can take much more o’ this abuse !! " *</p>

<p>why are people being an ******* to OP? he asks for advice and you guys are *****ing about how long his post is.</p>

<p>to the OP i would say to try to move on buddy. if it is meant to be she’ll come back to you man.</p>

<p>Move on. Two of my closest friends went through that exact same thing (they were the couple). She did it too, with the sudden stone walling and irritation. They never got back together, but the girl started to realize what she missed out on after a year. Now she tries to be clingy but he’s taken (which I think is a big part of why, reasoning below) - and though she’s also one of my best friends I think she deserves it.</p>

<p>It’s all well and good to be noble and wait for her. But patience is NOT a virtue here. It only makes you seem desperate and unattractive, and at best you’re going to end up being her perpetual cuddle of last resort. Trust me, if you want her back (entirely your prerogative, though personally I wouldn’t) go out with other girls. Once she realizes that you’re desirable and might lose you to someone else, her opinion will change in a heartbeat.</p>