<p>Again, if the purpose of the trip is simply to get a feel for a suburban , small (and well respected, ok that too) school, then that can be the goal. Doesnt need to be, at this point, for the purpose of deciding to apply to that school, but to see if that type of school (size, location, etc) appeals to her. We visited our big flagship Univ. They hated it. Helped them decide they did NOT want a big U. Helped to narrow down to looking at small and midsized schools.</p>
<p>Here’s what my slackery son said, “You should have taken me to visit Yale when I was younger, if I’d known how nice it was, I would have worked harder in high school.” (We’d taken him to reunions at Harvard, but he was unimpressed BTW.) I don’t think it would have lit a fire under him, but it might have. He did all right in the end. (Attending Tufts.)</p>
<p>I am also debating with my junior DS and planning to visit that area in about a month. For the OP, Princeton does not offer weekends info sessions or campus tours in the Spring. So make sure you check the site.</p>
<p>Another thing, they don’t require sign ups for their tour, you just show up according to the website. I don’t know if you sign your name somewhere when they actually do the tour so they at least have some record that you visited? Anyone know? This way they could track demonstrated interest besides using analytics, email, etc.?</p>
<p>I agree with the above poster. It’s not about applying to that particular school, it’s about looking at campuses and seeing what you like.</p>
<p>Don’t do it unless and until your d. has a safety where she is sure to get in, that you can afford, and that she loves. I would put ALL available energy into that first.</p>
<p>But, putting all that aside, your d. told you she doesn’t want to go, and gave you a good reason. Why should she have the implied specter of Princeton sitting over her head? I’d trust her.</p>
<p>Does your D not want to go at all or did she dismiss the trip simply because she figured she couldn’t get into Princeton? If she’s really not up for going, then I wouldn’t force her, especially since it’s a trip that you could do at a later date.</p>
<p>I agree that safety schools are the most important schools to look at and fall in love with. I also think that deciding whether or not to visit Princeton is turning into a much bigger deal than it needs to be. If everyone is up for a nice day and some exercise , great!!! If the student truly has zero interest in visiting, that is also fine!!</p>
<p>I wouldn’t push it if she is not interested. My D and I have wandered the Princeton campus a few times when we were in the area. I do not feel it is representative of schools that size; most other campuses we visited have not been like Princeton at all!</p>
<p>The best time to visit campuses is spring break- when we visited the nearby campuses in junior year of my DS there were quite a number of freshmen and sophomore visiting and attending info sessions as well. I thought it was a good idea because the admission officers were discussing the criteria and hearing from them, they might get inspired.</p>
<p>Touring one of the most difficult to get into colleges with your D, after she has already said she wasnt interested, is a ridiculous idea . There are plenty of pretty colleges to visit on the east coast, if that is what YOU want to do. And if you want to visit colleges with your D, then focus on her safeties, as mini said. But dont drag your D along to Princeton. She seems to have a much more realistic view of her chances than you do, which are basically nil if she is not earning all A’s her sophomore year, or is not a star athlete-scholar.</p>
<p>Unless you are a recruited athlete that the Ivy’s are falling over themselves to land, the only time it is worth visiting the uber competitive colleges is when you have an acceptance letter in hand.</p>
<p>There is something to be said for doing SOME kind of college visit or two sophomore year. A lot of kids get motivated by that. For D1, we went to a local LAC that is good, but definitely not top tier. She came away from it saying she liked it okay, but thought she could do better, and she definitely buckled down on her grades and SAT studying after that. It payed off at admissions time, for sure, and she ended up at a higher ranked LAC with some nice merit aid. For my D2, we saw a couple of reach schools early in her junior year. She was also motivated by that. But we didn’t pick them just on “name value” (eg, a top Ivy). We picked them based on her personality & possible fit with interests (specifically, U of Chicago & Swarthmore because she is very much the intellectual type). </p>
<p>Fast forward to this fall – she got into both Chicago & Swat. If we hadn’t visited to kick-start her motivation, I doubt it would have happened. It won’t work for every kid. And visit a school or two that you have good reason to think is a particularly good fit for your kid, not just a “top brand”. I also think you still need to keep most of your visiting to match & a few safety schools.</p>
<p>Congrats to your D intparent, they are two great schools!</p>
<p>Thanks… she is also in at Harvey Mudd. She is VERY excited, but having a heck of a time deciding. And we both feel awful about turning down her matches and safeties (particular soft spot for Kenyon with its beautiful campus – I was just wondering last night if I could put the window decal they sent in on my car even if she doesn’t attend. 
).</p>
<p>As a New Jersey native - I say spend a day in Princeton - you will have a lovely time (esp. if the weather is nice). I have never actually been on the Princeton tour. However the campus is probably the most beautiful around and I have visited several times - go and enjoy their outstanding museum (world class - this alone is well worth the trip), stroll the quaint main street, window shop the stores, and have a nice lunch (al fresco if the weather permits). So, go for the fun -with no pressure to apply.</p>
<p>Nice options, intparent!! Congrats on all!!</p>
<p>If your daughter has never been on a college campus, and you and she think that she would benefit from seeing, in general terms, what it’s like, why not visit Rutgers instead?</p>
<p>Same area. Much less emotional stress.</p>
<p>Marian is right… tell you D she needs to go on at least 1 college visit this spring to see what it is like (ideally while schools are still in session and there are kids on campus). Give her a few choices – if she isn’t comfortable going to a reach, then give her a few “matches” of different types (universities, LACs, etc.) and let her pick one that looks interesting. I think just getting her onto a campus to get her thinking that “this is real and in a couple of years is going to be me” is important, and can really pay dividends. Don’t worry about whether it is a reach or not at this point.</p>
<p>Re-reading your original post, one more thing… I would NOT start your D’s college search off with an argument/battle over the first visit. If she is not interested, don’t try to force her. Two hours away is actually VERY close if she decides to visit there in the next 18 months, before you are done you will likely be taking plane trips and much longer car trips than 2 hours for this. And it is very important to get some buy from her on the first visit. So take the “going to be nearby” part out of the equation and give her a few other options for a first visit. If you don’t have a Fiske Guide to Colleges book yet, I suggest that as a great investment to read up on colleges. (That Fiske guy and Cal Newport, who has a book I also frequently recommend, really ought to pay me royalties!).</p>
<p>We kick started our tours spring break sophomore year. We were vacationing several states away and decided to fly there and drive home stopping along the way. We then saw a school in a charming city, a big public U and a medium sized private. Good combo, and it got us on the road to narrowing down fit and gave the idea of 3 very different schools and what she did and didn’t like.</p>
<p>If she’s into it that’s fine, and I can see the notion of taking a 8th/9th grader who is already an uber achiever for motivation, but I can’t imagine wasting a day at an ivy when you’re looking seriously for matches. Princeton is a charming little area though, hubby lived there when we were dating.</p>
<p>Princeton has tours (but not information sessions) this weekend, I checked the website weeks ago when I knew we would be in Newark.
I know how beautiful Princeton is; I’ve been there a couple of times and my memories of enjoying the campus and town are one reason I was thinking of it. But I just asked D in as casual and no-pressure tone as I could and she says she’s not interested. So we’ll see if we leave it for another time or whatever.</p>
<p>As for the issue of getting acquainted with campuses, we’ve done 1 formal tour, Cornell, when we were in that area last summer. Cornell’s College of Human Ecology is a possible match for her–their acceptance rate for NY state students is around 35%. She’s also seen quite a number of schools informally–I teach at a community college and she’s been there many times ever since she was a baby at the day care center on campus. Then over the past 4-5 years she’s seen the Columbia campus during a book fair, been in a dorm room at NYU when my husband attended a seminar there; she’s been to 3 museums at Yale, and walked around Harvard Yard when we visited Boston. We spent a week in Montreal and sublet an apartment on the edge of McGill from 4 students, and had an informal tour from a friend who works there. We’ve also been to events at Fordham (where many students from her HS end up) and Hofstra (her Speech/Debate league does a tournament there every year). Last summer we spent a long weekend at a family conference at the University of Scranton campus, lived in a sophomore suite, ate all our meals in the cafeteria and had to find our way to events in several buildings.</p>
<p>Here is my daughter’s story. We were visiting out of state family between Christmas and New Year when she was a junior in HS. I made her visit a top 20 college that was 30 min away. She did not want to visit as she wanted to sleep in :). I did make her go as we had visited a few colleges and I thought she would like this one. I told her to just visit and if she did not like it, then mark it off the list.
She did go with quite the teenager attitude. I could tell that she was impressed but she would not admit it until later that day. She made another visit the summer before her senior year. She was in love and is graduating this May from this college.
It is a running joke between us that she did not want to visit and that I made her. She is glad that she visited and has loved her time there.
Visiting colleges is about discovering what you like and what you really want in a college. No harm in visiting if you are nearby.</p>